[MF] A One Night Stand With A Girl I Met On Twitter (Part One)

Hey guys, long time lurker, first time poster here (although I often post on dirty penpals and the Celeb DPP). I’m just an average guy from south east England. My sex life has rarely been much to speak of, unlike many posts on here, but I do have a couple of very hot stories. This one is the story of the best sex I’ve ever had. Apologies in advance as this story is rather lengthy, but for those of you who stick with it, I think you’ll agree that the story is worth it.
The girl in question is still active on Twitter, I don’t know if she’s ever used Reddit, but I’m leaving her name out of my recount on the off chance.

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Back in 2011 I was scrolling through Twitter, I used to scroll through the trending hashtags to find people who I had things in common with. Truth be told not much has changed. Anyway, if I recall correctly it would have been around the time of the Reading & Leeds festival. I’ve never been myself, but I often watch the TV coverage. Anyway, I saw this girl on Twitter who had tweeted asking who Them Crooked Vultures were. I replied and explained that they were a supergroup formed of members from QOTSA, Foo Fighters and Led Zeppelin. She thanked me in her response and somewhere down the line we followed each other’s accounts. I didn’t think much more about it at the time.

Lending a Hand, Part 1 [MF] [Long]

Long-time reader, first-time poster. Hoping to make this a regular thing so long as people enjoy! Standard “good stuff starts here: _______” disclaimer applies.

(Upfront admission: this happened long enough ago that some aspects—a.k.a. dialogue—have gotten a little fuzzy. As such, I’ve taken a few liberties to make things read a bit more naturally. But rest assured, the recollections themselves are all true.)

I was in my senior year of university, and my course load was light. Being the go-getter that I am, I decided to get a job—specifically, one that would look good on my CV. After turning over a few rocks and talking to a few friends, I wound up getting a gig with the students’ union. Good work, cool people, and decent pay. What more could a 22-year-old want?

At first, I was sweet on one of the execs—a tall drink of “please sit on my face” named Tessa. Beyond being cute and easy to talk to, she was also the one I worked with the most. But after a couple of weeks, I found myself getting on really well with one of the other VP’s: a curvy redhead named Janice who was as bubbly as she was cool. Played in a band, told funny jokes, and rocked a delightfully tight and faded Velvet Underground t-shirt like it was going out of style.

[M]y fun night [W]ith a stranger in Venezuela

[Back Story]

This all takes place last year when I was staying at a nice resort hotel in Caracas Venezuela. The reason for being in Venezuela of all places is because I’m a professional baseball player and for those of you who don’t know, it’s a job that can literally take you anywhere to earn a paycheck. In Venezuela, Americans are often looked at as rich and possibly being a way for girls to escape poverty. The women there treated me as if I was a celebrity right away, pretty much the opposite of how I get treated back home. Now, I’m not the most attractive or confident guy but I would say that I usually have pretty decent luck with women, that is when I actually have the balls to talk to them. To paint you a picture I’m six foot, blonde hair, blue eyes, and have an athletic build. (Also, I’m 27 years old.)

Ended up sleeping with a semi-decently known person of minor “celebrity” status…had no clue she was, and didn’t find out until hours later, shortly before we did the deed (she was surprisingly deep too, philosophically-speaking) [MF]

Here’s something that I never thought would happen to me ever. Half of you probably won’t believe it, but I saw this sub and figured that it might actually be an interesting place to write it, so, here you go. Not every day this arbitrary stuff happens, and, frankly, I actually think that it is one of the funniest things that has ever happened to me in my life.

Anyway, so, yeah, I slept with this girl who turned out to be of some prominence, although, despite technically being subconsciously aware of her existence for years (never knew her name till then though), I literally had no idea who she was upon introduction, and did not until shortly before I sealed the deal. She probably liked the fact that I was not a fan and treated her like the average person you’d just strike up a conversation with. Since she is semi-somewhat “high profile”, I am not going to give out her name. The story is all that matters. It is likely that many of you, as I did not, haven’t ever heard of her, but I’m not going to be a dick. (I assume she is really only prominent in the younger teen demographic given what she does).

Alone with Ashley, Day 4 [mf][inc][mast]

“What’s up?”

I tossed my Popular Science magazine aside as Ash entered my bedroom and sat on the edge of my bed. Her friends were still hanging out downstairs probably wondering how to get me to come back so they could embarrass me further. Ash had her hair tied up in a messy bun and was wearing sweats and an oversized t-shirt. But damn did she look cute.

Ash began asking me about the type of girl I like and although she said it was because her friends were quizzing her, part of me wondered if she was asking for herself. At first I said she was my type, but in a sarcastic way and I’m glad that’s how it came out because at that exact moment her friend Simone passed by my door. I doubt she heard me, but still, I didn’t want our secret to become public knowledge. I guess I must have satisfied Ash because after I described my type she perked up, kissed me on the cheek, and dashed back downstairs. After she left I got up and closed the door, locking it behind her. I lay back on my bed, my dick already stiff and closed my eyes, remembering our time together the day before.

[MF] A Cold Summers Night

It had been a long, hot day when Ethan got back into the house. This was to be expected – after all summer in Queensland is typically on the wrong side of 35 degrees for comfort. He brushed the dirt off his boots and took them off and placed them on the patio. The patio was well weathered, in desperate need of a coat of paint, but had that country charm that is so often associated with older houses of its generation.

“I’ll add paint the patio to the list” Ethan murmured to himself as he ran his rough hands down the grey, splintering column next to his boots. “And probably a good sanding too.”

Looking out across the front paddock that stretched to the main road at the end of the long driveway, he could just stand there and smile. It had been a good season so far with plenty of rain and corn was over head height with a good chance of getting a decent yield for once. Turning towards the front door his nose was the first thing to turn off from the day – alerted by a smell of fresh bread drifting out of the kitchen. Ethan walked down the hall, his mismatched sock covered feet making little noise on the polished hardwood floors. Halfway down the hall, walking past dozens of photos hanging on the wooden walls put there by three generations, Ethan turned the corner into the study, or as Emma called it – her “Sanctuary”.

I thought she was 18 [mf]

I’m writing this at the risk of catching a lot of negativity from it. I’ll say that I’m very open minded and comfortable with myself and am not writing this for approval or disapproval. I know that I never seduced this girl in any way, and am not conflicted about what happened. I didn’t know how old she was, but she knew how old I was. This is a true story I’ve only told one other person and not in such detail. If something like this makes you uncomfortable, you don’t have to read it.

I was 36 at the time. I’d say I’m a pretty good looking guy and in excellent shape. And I only mention that because people might wonder how I pulled this young hottie. Anyways, I’m a professional photographer and single dad. I do the dad thing half of the week and the other half I like to party. And with my job and circle of friends I end up around a lot of young girls who model. About a year and a half ago, I had sex with a girl I thought was 18 but turns out she was actually 16. She had been telling people that she was 18. And in case you’re wondering, the legal age of consent in Hawaii is 16. Which I did not know prior to this occasion. So for anyone who claims this is against the law or that I’m going to jail, it’s not, and I won’t. So please hold off on those comments as well as any hateful comments that simply spew your immediate disapproval.

I had sex with an 16 year old. [mf]

This is a true story I’ve only told one other person. I’m a 38 year old single dad. I’m a professional photographer, I’m fit, healthy and happy. I live in Hawaii and I work and do the single dad thing half the week and the other half I like to party. I’ve been divorced for about 2.5 years and in that time I’ve slept with 45 different girls. Most of which were under 30, the majority under 25 and a couple 18 and 19 year olds. About a year and a half ago, I fucked a 16 year old…who, at the time, I thought was 18…because she was telling people she was 18. Thankfully the legal age of consent in Hawaii is 16.


This was no ordinary 16 year old. She was way ahead of her years. She had, and still has the body of a goddess and the face of an angel. Without a doubt, the hottest girl I’ve ever hooked up with. She’s one of those Instagram model/celebrity babes who has an obscene amount of followers and just gets paid to get her picture taken. You’ve probably even heard of her or are following her on Instagram. Obviously I won’t say her name.

[MF] Bending The Knee for Emilia Clarke [Celeb][Oral][Romance][Str8]

Game Of Thrones. It’s been an honor working on one of the best shows in the history of television. Dragons reigning down hell fire on swarms of armies. Sword fights between men and the undead. Incredible story. Gorgeous women bearing it all almost every episode. The list goes on and on of fantastic things and sometimes with friends I find myself dragging for minutes on what I got to film for the day. The one special reason for me why I love this job so much more though was for my girlfriend and hopeful future wife. Daenerys Targaryen herself, Emilia Clarke.

“You’ve been together for what, four years now? Don’t worry, she’ll say yes. You’ve got this.” The director reassures me while I’m sweating bullets behind the camera fiddling with the ring in my pocket. We finished filming the current season yesterday but me and the director convinced her that we needed to reshoot something real quick.

I look down the hallway and smile as I see her approaching. I give the director the thumbs up out of her sight to shout “Queen approaching!” like everything is normal. “Hi honey.” Giving her a gentle kiss on the forehead to not screw with her makeup I take her hand and we walk into the throne room.

In a wheelchair (m/f, oral)

(Please mind the misspellings.)

For the last several years she made a point of not staying in chain hotels. If she’d needed to live out of a small suite for a few weeks at a time she did not want to be able to predict the furniture and arrangement with more than sixty percent accuracy. In her early days of traveling she’d discovered most chains had the same handful of paintings and pictures in their rooms. Pastorals without location were mixed in with photographs of local landmarks taken from off angles. This happened from Seattle to Tampa.

Most of them were held in frames that hadn’t been replaced in decades. In a way she respected their resiliency. Hotels typically remodeled or rebranded every five to ten years but these frames persisted through each iteration. In a way, the hotel bent the frames’ will.

She’d come to recognize the patterns of local hotels. Without prompting, the staff would tell you about which celebrity who’d stayed there once, tipped everyone extravagantly, and then refused to stay anywhere else when they were in town. Young Celebrity Not To Be Named #1 was a jerk but Young Celebrity Nuber #2 was a sweetheart who also tended to ignore knocks on the door, usually didn’t bother to set the lock or generally wear clothes.