I had been married for 10 years and was in my early 40s. Like far too many people, the passion was lacking.
By so many measures, things were great. Great kids, nice home, good jobs, etc.
One problem we had always had sexually was that my wife was too uncomfortable with herself to enjoy receiving oral. And I love giving oral.
When I was in my teens and 20s I was always freaked out about not being able to last long enough to please a partner. A couple of bad early premature ejaculation experiences had me terrified.
So I developed very good oral skills. I figured that if I provided a couple (or more) really good organs through oral at the beginning, then maybe subsequent short comings would be less of an issue.
I had ample experiences with multiple partners to know it was something I was good at. But my wife didn’t let herself enjoy it.
As the passion waned, I really wanted to give mind blowing oral to a woman. I watched porn that focused on that and it was a regular fantasy.