[MF] That time I hooked up with my dream girl at an awkward party

[This is long. I also got cock blocked. Also, I’m going to write a second part sometime when I actually get the time to write it]

I like to think that everyone had ‘THAT’ girl in high school. The girl that you pined over but you figured nothing would ever happen. The girl that kind of gets stuck in your mind.

I did. And her name was Haley. She was the quirkiest of the quirky but super sexy. She had just an incredible ass that she had worked for, and her Scottish pale skin contrasted beautifully with her raven hair that she usually had tied up in a ponytail. I’d peg her at probably 5’6″? I had remembered when our Junior year came and her tits had suddenly become melons and I cracked a joke to her about it. Found out years later that I was “the first person to notice them” and she was so flattered– always been a weird friendship.

We were in theater together, and we had actually really disliked each other through most of high school. But in true teenager fashion, we became good friends for no real reason. We started to even flirt a little bit, but I was so oblivious back then that I didn’t realize it until years later.

The time I fucked my friend’s friend next to a dumpster [MF]

So this is not my classiest moment, but it’s definitely one of my favorites. It’s from a few years ago now from when I was living in Boston for a bit. Details changed all over for obvious reasons. I had just moved to the city and I was staying at my uncle’s place– important for the story later.

I went to my friend Jessica’s birthday– honestly, she was really cute. I was friends with her boyfriend, James (I always called them J and J) and there were about 23 of us at a long table at a pub kind of place. I was having a blast, talking everyone’s ears off– there was one girl name Melissa who really caught my eye who sat kitty corner to me. She had these Hazel eyes and this absolutely insane curly hair that screamed ‘I’m a California yuppie’ that was crazy different from everyone else at the table.

I cracked a really bad joke, and she giggled. I think it was about poop. My general rule is– they laugh at poop, holy shit they’re a winner.

That time my ex won me back

When I was a senior in college, I was dating this girl named Jess. In hindsight, we shared almost nothing in common. She was an evangelical Christian who was part of some crazy christian group and would admonish me constantly for being too hungover to even consider going to church. But we had the *best* sex. It was amazing. She was about five foot tall even, but she had perfect tits– I’m well over a foot taller than her for comparison. The biggest issue is that now and then she’d tell me that it was bad for her to have sex so she would only give me blowjobs. I wasn’t complaining either way, she gave the best head I’ve (still) ever gotten in my life. When we would fuck, she would start screaming “Oh my God” over and over as she got closer, and I think I enjoyed fucking her even more because of how religious she was. It was the best.

I was in a fraternity and we had something called “Formal”, which is where we would rent out these nice cabins in some secluded place and all have our own rooms and basically throw rip-roaring parties. It was an awesome time, and obviously, Jess was going to come with me.