We [MF] fucked each other in the ass on New Year’s.

This story doesn’t have any cheating. It doesn’t involve a 3way. It doesn’t involve a dark alley behind a bar. It happened in a boring, middle-class bedroom in the suburbs with the lights on low. But it does require some introduction.

[Archer](https://bad-dragon.com/products/archer) is [Bad Dragon’s](https://bad-dragon.com/) “most boring toy”. “It’s just a human penis”, they say. But ours has the ability to shoot a massive amount of cum into or onto whoever is taking it. Aside from the fact that Archer is 2.25″ thick, this is his best feature.

Uncle Joe is actually [Bandit](https://vixen-creations.myshopify.com/collections/vixskin/products/bandit?variant=1662794628) from Vixen. I don’t know how they measure him on the website, but ours is actually more like 8″x2″. The way he got the name Uncle Joe is absurd and involves some backhanded remark from the internet.

For the visually inclined, I’m tall, lanky, clean-shaven and nerdy, and when I tell people I’m actually 45 years old, they usually don’t believe me right away. I blame a lack of sun and not smoking. My wife by contrast, is ridiculously curvy. Her cup size is an H or I or something, also known as “we don’t carry that” most everywhere. You could buy small islands for the amount we spend on bras, which I suppose, is fitting.

We’d planned our Pandemic New Year’s to be similar to previous years. A quiet night in with a bottle of fake Champagne. Oh, and I was going to get fucked in the ass some time around midnight after all the wine was gone. So after the kids went to bed, out came the wine and the latest episode of The Expanse. Around 11:30 or so we hurried upstairs like a couple of drunk teenagers, and after undressing, she strapped on Uncle Joe and demanded I suck her cock. I wanted to do a good job, because, well, I’m a filthy whore. After doing the ol’ kneel and bob for a while, I shove that fucker all the way down my throat, and she grabs my head and holds me there until I gag.

“Slut.” is all she says while I gasp for air. “And what do you want now, slut?” She likes to hear me beg for it.

“Oh god, I need your cock in my ass. Please fuck me!”

“Well, get on your back on the bed then. Open your legs like the whore you are.” and I followed her instructions like an eager puppy, waiting for my treat. She put my ankles on her shoulders and leaned into me, carefully aiming her huge dick against my little hole. My eyes go between heavy-lidded lust and shock at the stretching feeling of her cock forcing me open, every few seconds. Finally she’s all the way in me, the familiar pleasure of Uncle Joe completely filling my rectum causes me to melt under her, and her enormous boobs smothering half of me. She doesn’t give me much time to rest though before she starts fucking me, and before I know it I’m getting my ass fully railed while I’m writhing around in ecstasy underneath her, and I’m digging my heels into her hips to encourage her even more. We up the pace, and before long she has her first orgasm. I ride her through it, and she just keeps on fucking me through a couple more. We switch positions, and she cums a bunch more times as well.

Then things get interesting.

“How about I make Archer blow his load in my ass while I fuck yours?” I ask.

“Mmmmm! Hahahaha! Yeeees!” was her response, and I have to get up and get everything ready for that. I come back from the ensuite bathroom with that thick fucker fully primed, and she’s already face down, ass up, my cue to eat her ass out and tongue-fuck her to get her ready. Lube gets applied to all involved, and soon I’m sinking my slightly-bigger-than-average cock into her asshole. I stop to let her adjust, and just coincidentally, stretch my own anal ring around Archer’s head. Although my ass is already mostly prepared for this, it still takes a moment or two to get him in, because of how much thicker he is than Uncle Joe. But once Archer’s balls meet my ass, I leaned down to say into my wife’s ear:

“This is how it felt for me to take it just a minute ago!”

She totally gets off on the fantasy that I’m getting fucked by another dude, so this just puts her into overdrive. She moans and shoves her ass back against me, and we’re off to the races. It’s awkward for me because I’m trying to coordinate so many things, but she’s feeling my dick in her, and imagining some Tinder date pounding me right into her. It doesn’t take long for her first anal orgasm to slam through her. Then again and again, and I can’t take much more of this. I grab the syringe and put the plunger against her hip so she knows that Archer’s cum is going to be spurting into me, and start doing exactly that. I groan as he floods my rectum, and she grunts as she cums god knows how many times. Her orgasms just run together into one long one at this point.

I drop everything and grab onto my wife’s hips with both hands. Archer slips out of my ass, followed by a gush of his cum down my leg. I’d like to savour that feeling, but I’ve got another one going on right then as I start slam-fucking her ass. Of course, she cums several times more, because that’s just the way she rolls, but it still takes a few minutes before I can finally blast my nut deep inside her.

We collapse. A bathroom break is had. Someone checks the time.

“Well, it’s 2021 now. We survived! High five!”

Sorry for how long this is, but there was just so much going on, and everything was so awesome, just saying “she fucked my ass, I fucked hers, while I got a load of fake cum in me” just wouldn’t do it justice.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/kpji05/we_mf_fucked_each_other_in_the_ass_on_new_years