Y’all ever try to fuck after a marathon? [FM]

This story is 100% pure comedy. If you want hot sex, go to almost anything else I’ve posted.

Once upon a time I was one of those people who despised working out. When people asked how I stayed in shape I would answer “woodworking and lovemaking,” but the truth is I’ve just been blessed with good genes and am naturally thin.

Then I started dating a marathon runner. He’s one of those annoyingly healthy people who gets up at 5:00am to run and meditate.

*We get it. You’re good at life, you fucking show off.*

Back then you could not drag me out of bed before the workday began and I regularly skipped meals and survived mainly on coffee and chicken nuggets.

Then the pandemic hit.

It became clear very quickly I needed a hobby outside and running was the natural endgame.

As much as exercising is the fucking worst, I’m a fan of certain side effects, namely my body was banging while I was training for a marathon. I actually don’t think I lost weight when I took up this hobby, but rather gained muscle and stamina.

My partner noticed.

I mean, mutual attraction had never been an issue, but the firmness of my ass certainly didn’t hurt our relationship. Also, I could finally keep up with him. The man can go for fucking hours.

*Side note: my partner gets hard in like 2 seconds flat like he’s still a teenager. A fun game I like to play with him is “How fast can I give this man an erection in public?” We were once in a pool with all our friends and I blew in his ear. He got so pissed at me.*

So bottom line, between the whole being stuck indoors for months at a time and my consistent exercise, we were having more sex than usual.

So we both decide to sign up for a marathon and run it together.

*Yall ever run a long distance like that? Because it wrecks your body but your mind stays hyped. You see where this is going?*

So we get home and take a shower together. One minute I am talking a million miles a minute and the next I’m thinking I might fall asleep. As we’re washing each other I make the mistake of looking down. He had been lathering my breasts directly before and was clearly enjoying it.

“Ignore it,” he says. “I can’t help it.”

“I mean… I’m down if you are.”

He groans a little. “I don’t know if I can.”

I reach down and do a bit of magic to convince him. He presses me against the wall and we start making out as his hand goes to my chest and starts massaging.

*I fucking love shower sex.*

So he is much taller than me. We’ve tried to fuck in the shower multiple ways and we’re pretty much confined to either oral or with me wholly bent over.

So I bend over.

I put my palms on the back wall and let my ass rub against him. I don’t care how tired we are, there’s no way we’re not going to fuck.

When he first thrusts inside me, for a while it feels amazing. We’re both still weirdly high from the race and he’s slamming into me super hard. So hard, in fact, I start inching forward and have to bend my knees to keep him in me.

My legs give out, I lung forward and hit my head on the tile, and I end up on the shower floor. He looks down at me, absolutely horrified but I’m just laughing as I rub the knot forming on my head.

“Holy shit, are you ok?”

“Yes! Yes. My legs are apparently weaker than I anticipated.” They’re shaking under the strain and I try to stand and fall back. “Maybe I should just stay down here a while,” I laugh. Then an idea occurs. I get on my knees and look up at him with a smile. “Maybe I *should* just stay down here a while.”

I love giving head in the shower. Everything is nice and fresh so I tend to use my tongue pretty freely. I am taking these liberties and going to town by taking my time to lick him up and down before fully taking him in my mouth. The adrenaline has me so hyped I’m going faster than normal and he has to brace himself as he tells me how good it feels. I deep throat him and watch as he grabs my head and gasps.

The problem is, as I’ve mentioned he’s much taller than me. Even when I’m on my knees he has to bend slightly so I can take him fully in.

“I’m getting close,” he says.

*Fuck yes.*

“This feels good.”

*Im totally going to touch myself to the thought of this later.*

“My… Oh god… My… My legs are giving out, V.”

And with a crash he is right beside me on the floor. He hits his head on the way down and for half a second a worry he has passed out. Nope, his muscles just rebelled against him.

We lie there for a while, laughing as the shower water hits us. I ask if he wants me to continue and he tells me he’s afraid the attempt might literally kill him. After a solid ten minutes of recovering, we practically crawl out of the shower, dry off, and manage to put on sweatpants and settle into the couch with Gatorade.

After a couple of hours we’re actually feeling a little better. We put on a movie and take turns massaging each other as we start the process of recovery.

We have the bright idea of making one of his “special recovery whiskey” drinks to numb the pain. We each have two.

Let me tell you about what alcohol does when your body it’s still processing that long of a run… it hits you hard.

We are LOOSING it over this dumb Netflix comedy and start mildly flirting with each other. I joke that he definitely wants to fuck Keanu Reeves and he tells me he only wants to fuck me. The whiskey is making us ambitious so I pull him on top of me and we start making out.

Clothes start coming off as he moves to finger me. He’s pretty fucking good with his fingers. It’s hard for me to get off that way, but he knows how to read my body and it’s a nice sequitur before we actually fuck. In this particular moment, he’s pent up from before and really goes hard, tugging on my hair to keep me in place as he plunges into me.

*He also really likes staring at me when I feel good which I’ve learned to greatly appreciate.*

I’m building pretty quickly and pull his body against mine, ready to escalate this, until a feel weird jolt from his hand and cry out when his fingers suddenly spread inside of me.

“Fuck!” He screams as he pulls his hand away. His damn arm is cramping up. I run and grab more water and get him to drink as his muscles gradually relax.

His dick does not.

I smile down at him because he’s still hard. He gives me a little shrug and pats his lap as an invite.

Why not? I’m half naked, wet, and a little tipsy.

I climb onto his lap and straddle him, weaving my hands into his hair as I push our bodies together.

I feel a sharp stab of pain and not in a good way.

The soreness from the day is finally hitting me and every movement is taking more effort than I’ve ever felt before. I have to stop for a moment to catch my breath. I continue moving my hips to try and get some momentum, but every move feels like a whole workout.

Finally, my body gives out. Everything in me just collapses and out foreheads bump as I fall forward.

God damn it.

I literally fall to the side the moment I climb off of him and have to lie in agony for a few seconds as I catch my breath.

When the pain subsides, we burst out laughing again. We’re horny idiots who at last accept defeat and go back to lesser ambitions like rehydrating and sleeping.

I think the moral of this story is definitely to never start working out.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/rvxi6g/yall_ever_try_to_fuck_after_a_marathon_fm

18 comments

  1. This is the funniest thing I have read in ages… THANK YOU.

    *I think the moral of this story is definitely to never start working out.* Advice taken.

  2. As a personal trainer, I can’t sign off on not working out. Even if you don’t hire someone, it’s just good for you.

    In terms of sex, working out made everything better in general. And sex after a workout is amazing (which you would have found out if you hadn’t just run a fucking marathon). The rush of endorphins post workout (“Runner’s high”) combined with the pheromones produced have given me some of the best sexual experiences of my life. 10/10 highly recommend.

    Plus, my face is like a 5/10, so I need to keep the body at 8+. 🙂

  3. I just ran my first marathon last month. About the only way I could get dirty would be to sit on the chaise part of the couch with my legs straight. I’d be down for anything provided she could get I to position and was happy working it herself. About all the active stuff I could do would be fingering and eating pussy.

  4. Nice recovery! Glad neither of you got seriously hurt.

    While I appreciate all the benefits that running and other cardio does for me there are nights when having sex after a hard workout and I’m like “sorry babe you’re getting like 50% effort, legs are jelly”.

  5. Actually, yes! I ran the Chicago Marathon this fall and hooked up that afternoon. I would write up the story but it would mostly be a regular sex story with a bunch of “my thighs were very sore while she was sucking my dick” and “my calf was cramping while I was thrusting into her from behind” 😅 maybe a more interesting story to write about would be hooking up during a 2 day Ragnar race.

  6. This is hilarious, but I gotta say, sex definitely does sound like the worst time to get a cramp.

  7. My wife and I used to run multiple half marathons a year. We once hooked up after the race in the lobby unisex bathroom in a hotel near the finish line.

    It was quite the day. Get up super early, run 13+ miles, drink at the post race party, fuck carefully and gingerly in a hotel washroom.

    We were back home by 100pm.

  8. Fantasticly funny story. You know, you just can’t make up the true stuff in your life. I hope you got some rest and re-hydrated before your next marathon of sex.

  9. I swear I’m 5x as horny since I started running long distances 😂

  10. I’m glad neither one of you got hurt but this shit had me laughing going just accept defeat in my head 🤣🤣. I needed this ty.

  11. Thanks for posting I’ve got a half and a full marathon coming up this year and this is the first warning of the after effects of a long run

  12. Sex after working out is wild. I’ll go on a long bike ride and want to both immediately jump in a shower and sleep and also get it in immediately. Whole brain is on fire.

    It’s really hot to see how attracted the two of you are to each other.

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