*[This is my first attempt at writing erotic literature, so feedback is greatly appreciated!]*
**A Visit to My Friend’s New Apartment**
Penny had been in a long-term long-distance relationship since shortly before we had met. And yet, we had never stopped us from flirting. Sometimes our flirting was done knowingly, as a joke between two close friends. We would hit-up college parties together and pretend to be a couple, making up absurd identities for each other to play. I would pretend to be an international student from Germany, for example, who studied architecture who also had a furniture fetish. She would play a local stripper who was only stripping as a way to raise money for veterinary school. It was quite fun.
But sometimes our flirting felt dangerous. There were at least two (three?) times we started the night sober-cuddling in a fairly platonic way and eventually ended up drunk-cuddling in a way that felt, well, less platonic. And once, after doing edibles with a group of friends, our warm embrace slowly turned into us stroking each other’s arms which led to me tickling her back and her caressing my neck. Our foreheads were touching and our eyes were locked and I’m pretty sure if there weren’t four other people there one of us would’ve leaned in for a kiss.
Of course, Penny was extraordinarily cute. She was on the short side, half-Asian with luscious long hair. Her figure was very nice. But her most charming feature was by far her laugh, a giggle that was equal parts adorable and seductive.
Penny had just moved into a Stanford’s graduate student housing, and invited me to stop by. She told me she was the only one there, and has yet to even meet her suitemates. Thus, you can understand my surprise when somebody who wasn’t Penny answered the door.
“Hello.”
“Oh…hi. Uh, hello.”
“I’m Penny’s sister.”
“Hi, ‘Penny’s sister’. It’s nice to meet you. Um, what’s your name?”
“Half-Pence,” she said. She was smiling. And staring at me. Then she suddenly turned around and retreated into the apartment. She looked quite similar to Penny, though a bit taller. And younger.
“Jay, I’m in the kitchen. Come in!” called Penny, “I’m making White Russians, do you want one?”
“Absolutely,” I said.
***
The evening was progressing well. Conversations with Penny were always great. I studied literature and Penny studied computer science, yet we were always able to find something to talk about: politics, television, mixology, gossip, etc. That conversation I spent learning about her family. We’d talked about her parents extensively, but never her siblings. In fact, I never knew she even had any. I learned her sister’s actual name was Jane and that she had just finished her freshman year at UC Berkley. I also learned she had two younger brothers, who were twins. Twins are always creepy, I noted. Penny agreed.
Jane popped in and out of our conversation, but spent most of her time in the kitchen baking bread or “warming her buns” as she called it. We made eye contact a few times, but I didn’t think much of it. Then, suddenly, she walked into the living room and sat next to me on the couch.
“I really liked your performance in *Midsummer*,” she said, “I thought you made an *excellent* Bottom.”
“Oh, thanks,” I said. I was taken a bit off-guard. Plus, I’m awkward about receiving compliments and never know what to say. Penny and I had performed in our school’s production of *A Midsummer Night’s Dream.* But that was three years ago. Jane had seen that? She remembered it? I was worried I was making things awkward so without much thinking I started talking.
“It was actually a change of pace for me. I usually top,” I blurted.
Penny laughed and some Kahlua-infused milk sprayed out of her nose.
“Shit. Okay I’m going to use this as an opportunity to change into something more comfortable. Jay: I will see you in a bit.” And with that she was off. Jane walked off towards the back rooms with her sister, leaving me alone. I putzed around for a minute, but grew bored quickly. I was also trying not to think about Penny changing. So I decided to go use bathroom.
***
When I opened the bathroom door, I was struck. There was Jane, leaning over the sink butt-naked making faces to herself in the mirror. And, *wow*, her butt. My eyes traced along her perfectly scrumptious-looking ass and her sexy arched back several times over.
“If you’re not going to stop staring, at least come in,” she said, smiling.
Without thinking, I took a step forward and locked the door.
“It sure took you long enough,” she said while walking towards me. “You’re going to have to make it up to me, okay?”
“Absolutely,” I said as I grabbed her arm and yanked her towards me. I kissed her and felt her kiss back, hard. She tugged at my shirt and started slowly unbuttoning it. “That’s not how we’re going to do this,” I told her. I quickly pulled off my shirt, silently thanking myself for having finally having gotten into shape this summer. I turned her around and pressed her against the bathroom door. I swear I could feel her body shiver with anticipation.
I continued by kissing her neck, gently at first. She reached down to grab my cock which was hard by now and pressing into her ass through my jeans. But every time she would reach down I was take her wrists and firmly press them against the door and kiss her neck more aggressively—sucking, I was sucking on her neck now with increasing urgency. And when my hands weren’t holding hers down they were playing with her breasts. They felt amazing, just barely big enough to fully fill my hands. I ran my fingers over her nipples which caused her to moan so I pinched them. Now her noises grew more guttural and primal.
I told her to drop down on her knees and she immediately knew what to do. She unbuttoned my pants, pulled down my underwear, and as my cock was just about to enter her mouth I grabbed her hair and stopped her.
“Wait. I changed my mind.” I said. She seemed confused and disappointed. I told her to stand up, and as she was doing so I smacked her ass—hard—so she knew we weren’t done. I bent her down over the sink, like how she was standing when I walked in. I used my legs to spread hers apart. We locked eyes through the mirror.
“Are you ready?”
“Mhmm.” She could barely muster words.
I spread open her pussy lips and pushed my cock inside of her. It felt so amazing to feel myself fill her. I wanted more. I wanted to fill her up completely. As I began to thrust and she started to moan once again I decided spread her ass cheeks apart.
“Yes, yes,” she egged me on. I licked my thumb and placed it on the rim of her asshole. It was as clean as a whistle, as though she had been preparing for this. I continued to thrust my cock deep inside of her and at times I felt her feet lift of the ground. “Jaaaaaaay,” she moaned among plenty of subverbal signs of pleasure. But as the frequency and intensity of my thrusts increased so did the frequency with which she used me name. It was lovely. “Jay, Jay, JAY!” she screamed, my cock and thumb now both fully inside of her. She was amazing. She was everything. I was entranced. She was mine, and I was her’s.
“Oh, oh, oh, Penny!” I shouted as I came.
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/af6cxo/a_visit_to_my_friends_new_apartment
Ok so u just called out penny’s name while fucking her sister wow
This is good. I want to know what happens next after you called out Penny’s name instead of Jane’s.
As for feedback, I can’t think of anything to change on the erotic side, but if you want it to be more polished in general you could consider checking it over after writing it. I noticed that you wrote “we” instead of “that” in the sentence “And yet, we had never stopped us from flirting.” After that part I was just focusing on the story.