NOTE: Most of the things I have here are pretty much just things I'm taking straight out of that old diary I have here – I don't remember everything I was feeling or everything I was thinking, especially since this was a little bit over a year ago. :) (I'm still laughing at myself though HAHAH I was embarrassing)
I didn't talk to Mel for three days after he took my virginity, and for multiple reasons:
1) What the fuck was I thinking? I had every right to say no and not open that door and not even respond to anything he was doing. I had every right to scream, to shout, and to fight back – but I didn't. (I'd honestly written #regret. I know, I'm embarrassing).
2) He was my dad's best friend. Holy shit, he was my dad's best friend and I'd done it with him and my dad would kill us both if he found out.
3) I didn't know if he had any STDs and if he'd given me one I would have fucking died of embarrassment.