**How it all started**
My confusing, shameful anal kink started when my ex and I were having anal sex for the first time together. Let’s call him Matt for the story’s sake. I read online that it hurt less if the girl was on top (boy, was I wrong), so I straddled him in the cowgirl position as he pumped beneath me. Matt is well-endowed, and he hurt right away, but I tried my best to accommodate his girth.
After a short while, it felt like he was about to split me in two, so I said something like, “It’s hurting. Maybe we should stop.” But Matt kept going (maybe I wasn’t clear enough), and eventually the pain became too unbearable, and I involuntarily shouted, “Noooo!” and he came in my ass while moaning—his face all tensed up from his orgasm.
When Matt recovered, he looked disgusted with himself, like he had just discovered something about his personality and wasn’t sure how he felt about it morally and said, “You saying ‘Nooo!’ made me cum.” I slowly lifted off of him and could feel his warm, silky cum in my ass. I was a little worried that it would leak out of me and into my pussy (not on the pill) or make a mess, so I rushed off to the bathroom.