It all started when my girlfriend Jamie left her favorite vibrator at my place.
We live about five hours apart, and we usually see each other every other week – but this was one of those stints where our schedules weren’t going to line up for about three weeks straight. So… leaving her favorite toy at my apartment?? I could just imagine her lying in bed, fresh out of the tub, frustrated that she didn’t have her happy pink wand to send her into oblivion before going to sleep.
I decided to hop on Amazon and send her something new. We already have a decent collection of toys: some plugs, restraints, a small rabbit vibe, an over-complicated vibrating cock ring that we only used once. But all of them have that new-age design: pastel colors and abstract shapes that look more like art objects than sex toys. So I decided to get her something totally unambiguous: a clear, 7-inch silicon dildo. Not massive by any means, but bigger (and definitely girthier) than mine. Except for the fact that it was clear, it looked very realistic. It was veiny, with a big, bulbous head – and it came with a suction cup, and a pair of balls that I figured would make it easier for Jamie to hold on to.