Author: PretendPrint

My [M] one gig at a swinger’s group [M/F/M/F/M/F] Yikes!

In my late 20’s, I was part of a band. We never really clicked but we did do quite a few clubs, things like that. Towards the last I found myself getting booked solo at parties, The two nights a week bookings the band was getting were not exactly covering food.

I found myself playing solo guitar background music in a dinner house in East Portland, $20 and a meal. One night this couple came up to me and asked me if I played at private parties, offered me $50!! You BET I played at private parties for that much, so I found myself a couple of days later sitting on a stool in the corner of a large living room, with a houseful of people there.

Now I was much younger than the guests, that was noticeable. Also quite noticeable was there obviously was some things going on I wasn’t used to, like a few couples sitting around getting rather friendly. One guy was on a couch and a lady was blatantly rubbing his crotch, in short order he had one of her boobs out of her dress and was playing with it. Read more »

That masseuse [F] I [M] have been coaxing came by Sunday

One part of my lifestyle that I love is the massage with happy ending situation. For a very long time I have been into massages, even to the point of going to college, two different ones in fact and actually working part time as a masseur myself. A few times I had as many as 3 clients a week, and ended up in quite a few sexy situations.

All of the latter is a bunch of other stories, this one is about last Sunday. I found this local lady working free lance online, managed to get an appointment for here at home. Craigslist used to be a good source, but with that gone now, it’s more difficult. This one, believe it or not, I found on Facebook. First find one local, send a friend request, move to messenger. Not easy, but the ad sites are full of hookers.

Now my wife knows all about this fetish of mine, she gets a kick out of it and often we both get rubdowns. My wife is a Doctor, and she has a totally different outlook on life, sexuality, than any female I have ever known in my entire life. No jealousy at all, she will often elbow me and point out some nice looking lady we might see out in public to make sure I don’t miss out. Or she will want me to describe how my own recent massage went while working to get me going herself. Read more »

That nurse [F] at my [M] Colonoscopy procedure

This one is from way back, I was in my late 30’s at the time. No one will believe it, (I almost don’t myself) but it’s quite true.

I was having some abdominal upsets, my local G/P sent me to Portland for what he called a lower GI. Basically a crowbar with a camera on it up the behind, since it was just the lower Colon, no putting me under. Portland is a 100 mile drive for me, PIA but needed to be done, I was seriously having some discomfort.

I arrived after having done the lime flavored battery acid deal, (any of you who have had this done know what I mean) and zero food for one previous day, needless to say my mood was not the best.

The receptionist was a crabby acting old lady about 60 or so, she checked me in and told me they were running behind so it would be a half hour. What she meant was an hour and a half, which added to my mood. So from this, you can probably tell I was not in the least bit excited at the prospect of having some Doctor stuffing things up my most private region. Read more »

Surprise for me [M] and the wife [F] on vacation

This happened close to 25 years ago, just a memory from way back. I was married to a wonderful woman named Dotty, our relationship was perfectly normal and content. In two decades together there were no affairs, nothing out of the ordinary at all. About the naughtiest thing I ever did was stop for a beer at a local dancer tavern, the girls wore G-strings and pasties. I didn’t hide that from Dotty, even asked her if she wanted to go, but she never did.

We took annual vacations to different resorts, one year I got a huge sales bonus, $5000, so we decided to do a gambling trip, and chose Reno, one of the casinos that at the time was a family run operation. We got a spa suite, fancy for our lifestyle but with plenty of extra cash the cost didn’t matter, and we planned to splurge on meals and shows, and try our luck at the games. Read more »

My [M] dermatologist [F] appointment last Monday

My wife got home Saturday, she is a Doctor that runs our local clinic. I would love to just let her be my Doctor, but I can’t, some ethics thing. She does take care of me though, and she knows everyone in the profession around here, so I get sent to the best physicians.

My skin check appointment was Monday, after having one Squamous Cell Carcinoma removed last year they check me every three months. I was going to cancel since Debra was home but she wouldn’t let me, so we drove the 70 miles from here on the Oregon coast out to the dermatology center in the valley.

My Doctor has always been a grizzled old guy about 60 or so, thus NBD. He is the one I accused of SELLING the meat he cut off my back by the pound a couple of years ago. From the size of the hole he cut in me I know it would fill a Big Mac.

Imagine my surprise to find I am assigned to his new office partner this time, a very tiny little oriental gal about 30 or so, cute as a bug’s ear. Her nurse was not the matronly woman that was there the last time, instead another slightly larger and also pretty oriental lady. Read more »

Strip club fun with wife [F]

Wife and I were on a trip to a cousin’s wedding maybe 15 years or so ago, all the way to San Diego. We stopped at Vallejo at a motel, there was a strip club just a block away. I was surprised when she popped up saying she wanted to go, we had never been in one before together although I had back home in Portland.

The place was pretty tame, at that time some city law made them wear G-strings and pasties. We got to talking to a couple of young guys at the next table, they mentioned the hot show was North of town, out of the city limits. They couldn’t have been older than maybe 25. The wife said she wanted to go, so off we went, the two guys leading the way.

The place was different, it had a long bar that was wide, with stools lining the front. I found out why quickly, the dancers came out and danced on the bar, all of them naked. Tips got them to spread their legs, it was rather nasty. The wife and I were sitting at the bar with the two guys. It was loud in there so hard to talk much, but she was talking to the one fellow sitting next to her between songs, the other one was on my left. Read more »

How I [M] met my wife [F]

Medicare physical, I had been alone for nearly a decade after my 1st wife passed. The Doctor was a woman, younger than me, mildly heavy, but personality plus. She began by asking me questions about everything, what I did every day, where I went, even questions about how my life was clear back when I was a kid.

Then, questions about my sex life? She is the only Physician I ever saw that wanted to know. Did I masturbate, how often, what did I think about when I did, what excited me, did I have a partner, did I see prostitutes or massage girls, was I interested in homosexuality, and what was my biggest fantasy. She hesitated when I had to admit I had not had sex with anyone since my wife passed away.

That all startled me but somehow I was answering her truthfully and she managed to dig the deepest and darkest secrets out me. She even got me to tell her about a girl friend I had once that liked to flash guys, never wore panties, and how her doing that somehow made me hot. She just grinned and said that lots of us women like to do that, and that she seldom wore any either. Read more »

My [M] one and only massage by a [M], unexpected. (Really happened, a bit long)

I was just over 30 at the time, unattached and often went to different massage places. This was way back before the State of Oregon decided to legislate the massage profession, so it wasn’t really that difficult to find a woman willing to do a happy ending. In fact, most places had a receptionist out front that told you the rates and how much it was with a “hand finish.”

That actually was nice, a single guy could get the edge off without having to go through all of the wine and dine stuff. There was one place in south Portland I really preferred, it was clean, they had showers, and the price was right so if a guy struck out on an evening’s hunt for a one nighter, stopping off on the way home was a sure thing. I was young and in shape, had a few bucks in my pocket so usually I could find a friend in one of the clubs, but this night I was having no luck at all, so around 2 in the morning I drove down. The place was always open, I never saw it ever closed. Those of you that knew Portland back then will know about it, it was named after the creek nearby, same as the road it was on. The first thing I noticed was the parking lot in the back was full, I had to park down the street. I knew they usually had 3 or 4 girls on staff so it shouldn’t be a problem waiting, a few times before I had a short wait. Read more »

Long time masseuse [F] and me [M]

Posted by[u/PretendPrint](https://www.reddit.com/user/PretendPrint/)[1 minute ago](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/ci4uip/long_time_masseuse_f_and_me_m/)

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? **nsfw**

Her name was Lynn, I was barely 40, she was at least a decade older than me, likely more but I never knew her age. I hurt my back at my machine shop, picking up heavy engine parts I should never have tried to. A friend one day spotted my back brace, handed me a business card with her name on it. That night, I was getting ready for bed, the card fell out of my pocket. The next day I called, what sounded like a little girl, such a tiny voice answered.

Unsure, I made an appointment anyway. At her office, 3 flight up of course, she answered the door. Her shoulders and arms put mine to shame, she was tall, right at my own six feet. T-shirt, no bra, heavy busted that sagged, obvious. Then after an interview, she told me to take off my clothes and get on the table, sat down in a nearby chair and watched me as I undressed.

I was thinking from looking at her that I was going to die, this was a big strong woman with biceps larger than mine were. Her voice did not fit her appearance at all, she sounded like a teenager. Read more »

Surprise [M]in the shower [F]at home.. tame

Posted by[u/PretendPrint](https://www.reddit.com/user/PretendPrint/)[6 hours ago](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/can68p/surprise_m_in_the_shower_f_at_hometame/)

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? **nsfw**

Back when I was about 25 or so, I was prepping for running a marathon, NBD since I was usually way back in the pack but something I liked to do. I got to the house, saw a note from my wife that said she was shopping and would be home in a couple of hours.

So, I stripped down and hopped in the shower. I was just soaping down when I heard something, thinking the wife was home I called out.

“Nope, just me, is Sharon home?” I heard my wife’s friend Kathy say, she was right outside the frosted glass. Kathy typically came over a lot, and since I left the back door open she just came on in. She is a cute bubbly little thing, barely 5 feet tall and sort of skinny.

“No, she is shopping.” I said, rinsing my face.

Then I heard the shower door slide!

“What are you doing?” I asked, turning my back.

“Just curious, I want to take a look.” She laughed.

“No! Stop that.” I yelled.

“Oh come on, turn around, I want to see it.” Read more »