Summary: I was extremely depressed and suicidal because of some trauma. I learned about the ancient Ayahuasca ceremonies that helped people overcome their trauma and set out to find a non commercialized place to do it. With the help of a Brazilian friend I was eventually able to find a person who was the sole contact for a very isolated tribe of people. Most importantly they were had a shaman who sometimes took in outsiders and helped them. A week later I arrived at their settlement. I couldn’t communicate well, but could tell everyone was extremely friendly.
My Ayahuasca ceremony lasted 6 days and afterwards I felt brand new. I felt intense gratitude towards the tribe and I decided to stay a little longer.
They were polyamorist and sex was rarely done in privacy. Their view on sex was very different from what I grew up with (US). There were many purposes for sex, many specific rituals that helped individuals who partook come out with a better understanding and love for each other. I had watched them with fascination for a week before I joined. As a pale skinned woman I obviously stood out. I learned what features of the body men sexualized. For example it turned out the men cared little about the breasts of the woman, but had their eye on the woman’s mouth. A symmetrical jaw and lighter colors for the lips and tounge were coveted.