My mother was 21 and fresh out of college when she married the 35-year-old untenured Instructor she had secretly dated her senior year. I was born 7 months later, which explains why they were in such a hurry.
One day when I was 14 I came home from school 90 minutes earlier than scheduled. I thought the house was empty – Mom and Dad ought to have both been at their jobs. I was surprised to find my 50-year-old father and his 19-year-old girlfriend in the house. Shouting and threats ensued. I told Mom a few days later and they were divorced before my 15th birthday. I lived apart from him for years; Mom had custody.
The next months were difficult, but once the divorce was settled and court orders were complied with life settled down. I had such negative feelings towards my father that I was happy he was gone. I hated him for destroying our family (while he seethed at me for being the agent of his downfall). I declined the available parental visits to or with my dad, much to his relief.