[F] Bf refused to give me what I needed so I got it from somewhere else [Cheating] [Long]

I’ll start this with a big PSA: Yes, I cheated. Yes, I know how it’s seen in the eyes of the greater majority. Please, if you have any judgements, internalise them and be disgusted to yourself. Moving on…

Back story coming up, skip to “???????????” to get to the main story.

This goes back a couple of years ago when I was going through what I can only describe as a deeply profound sexual awakening. I had established certain kinks and vocalised my desire of them to my long term boyfriend of then, five years. My main desire was to be shared with another man/multiple men and be dominated in various ways.

Anyway my boyfriend was always quite vanilla but knew I had a kinky side. So was good at fucking me hard when push came to shove, he had a great cock- thick, long and bent in that perfect way that it hits a woman’s G spot straight away. I enjoyed the occasional spank on the ass but he was always so poor at that build up, that tension building foreplay that triggered that primal urge to be fucked, hard and wild.