The month of March has been one of excessive love making for me and my partner. Our need for each others’ bodies has been insatiable. I have been late to work on more than one occasion because I had been delayed try to make him cum. Comparing this year to last year, I am in awe. We have had more sex this month than we did in the entirety of last year.
An emotional cock block kept us from the sex life we had once had. But something in 2022 shifted. This distance I felt between me and the man I love dissipated. We opened up to each other. Shared our fears and moved through the resentments. I feel closer to him thank ever before.
This intimacy has transferred passionately into our bedroom. In the past few weeks we have been fucking all of the time and exploring each others’ kinks. The sex today was hot as ever, but like a lot of the times when he and I get intimate, he was not coming. I wanted him to get himself to cum by jacking off in front of me. After about 15 minutes of him jacking himself off sitting near the edge of the bed with me sitting in front of him on the floor anticipating his cum. But you can only anticipate for so long before you get bored.
I started describing to him a fantasy about him filming me while I pleasured him. He began to shudder while listening to me describe how hot it would be for us to make a porn for him to watch later. The best point of view point of view porn. He glanced at his phone then back at me and then back at his phone. He asked hesitantly, “Can I film you?”
Once his phone was on me I immediately felt myself performing for the camera. I wasn’t making contact with his eyes. I was looking for the eyes that would be watching the video. I was making a porn just for the man I loved. And then he came.
He had been jerking himself fast when he breathily said, “I’m going to cum.” I smile excitedly with an open mouth at the camera. Trying to show in my eyes the anticipation for his load to drape my face. Cum exploded onto my face. I had never seen a nut like this. Five separate massive streams of cum came out from his cock that had been so rock hard for hours. Cum dripped down my chin and breasts.
Sweet relief. We were finally done. After cleaning his massive load off of myself, I laid down next to him. I thought about how sexy I felt while he was filming and I was performing for him. In the past I have been absolutely terrified to watch any of the videos I made afterwards out of fear that i might look stupid or fat in them. But today I didn’t feel that same anxiety about seeing myself. I know I will look fat because I am fat. And that’s okay. And I felt to sexy while filming to think I could look stupid on camera. I asked my boyfriend if we could just watch the cum shot at the end because I knew it had to be hot. And it fucking was! Holy shit, I was watching it and finally seeing myself as the sexy woman that my boyfriend consistently insists that I am.
I felt inside of me an urge to post this portion of the video. It’s like I wanted everyone to know how sexy I am and how sexy I feel. I set up a new email and Reddit account and trimmed down my clip. I paused, questioning if I should really go through with this but a wave of ‘fuck it’ washed over me. If someone I know by rare chance happened to see me then they too would find out how hot I am. I don’t give a shit anymore. I feel sexy and I want to share that energy with strangers. I want to make people in different cities cum over the computer. I post.
And I’m glad I did. A video I thought would only get a few dozen views has racked up a couple of thousand. I didn’t know I would be so desired. Being coveted by strangers has turned me on past the point of feeling functional. I feel a deep yearning inside of me. The only brief relief from the discomfort of this extreme desire comes from gripping a nearby object as tightly as I can. As if I could transfer some of the tension of my lust to this object. Writing all of this down has me so wet right now. The video has cracked the door for new fantasies and I can’t wait to see where we go pleasuring each other together.