I [M] got a hand job at a hotel pool

This is one of my all-time favorite stories.

A week or so after meeting this one woman a few years older than me on Tinder, we went to a basketball game. We were talking all day, every day and it wasn’t just about sex. We had some great, intellectual conversations with some raunchy, dirty, steamy sexting sprinkled in, too.

Before we went to the game, I had a request: a maxi skirt with a thong. We met up at the arena before the game and, sure enough, she was wearing the skirt. I wasn’t sure what was under, though. Our seats were pretty high up and not many people were around us. We watched the game and had a beer. At one point, my arm was laying over her thighs and she was holding on to my arm, kind of snuggling with me. I let my hand drop in between her legs and she slowly spread them to my hand fall deeper. She took off her jean jacket and laid it over her lap. I hiked up her skirt and started rubbing her panties right at her slit. She was getting all wiggly so I knew she liked it and I got more daring. I slid her panties to the side and slid a finger in. She grabbed my arm so hard. But because of the angle, that was all we could do.

I [M] had first-date sex in a parking spot outside of a bar

I’m just a dad who’s working from home in an empty house and it’s given me time to reminisce about the good, old (read: single) days. I thought I’d write down some of my greatest hits to share with all of you. Hope you enjoy.

Before I met my wife, I used to love online dating. It was like shooting fish in a barrel or, better yet, online shopping for women. I used Tinder a lot and all the online dating sites. It resulted in lots of conversations with women, which turned into lots of dates and plenty of encounters. I always knew I wanted to settle down but I also knew I wanted to have as much fun as I could before that, and I knew if I’d know when I met the right woman.

When I was single, my approach was simple: I knew – and still know – that every woman has an inner slut. It was a matter of getting them to show it. Men, listen up: Women are like onions. Keep peeling back their layers and they’ll eventually peel off their clothes. And I also knew that I needed to use my words to start turning women on. Not just send them dick pics. I used my words carefully and wisely. It worked.