Family vacation v27.4, and I was alone once again in my bedroom. Another long day of watching bikini clad girls on the beach had come passed. This day our spot was particularly ripe for Instagram stories, and watching model-worthy girls make magic in real time was a little too much to bear.
I knocked back a few beers and, as a I sat on my bed, awaiting a reply from a Tinder match, I downloaded Grindr for the third or fourth time during that trip. I was right in that sweet spot of buzzed, horny, indignant, and verging on depression. Right where I had found myself so many times before. I had yet to admit to myself that I am not completely straight, and I justified my repeated forays into the virtual world of queer dating with my preference for femininity. *I* *was into women*, and transgender women are basically just girls with dicks. Bottoming was out of the question, but I would top one without thinking twice. Maybe even suck her off. That did not make me gay or bi.
Narrator: “His search history would suggest otherwise.”