[FM] How many people can say this – I got to play with my favorite porn star

I have been an exhibitionist my entire adult life. I started posting sexy images on 4Chan of all places, and loved the attention. I got such a rush knowing guys were stroking themselves to me. Once I entered the kink scene, I gained a reputation for fucking in front of people at parties, and I was known for being extremely vocal, enthusiastic, and skilled with a cock in my hands. Eventually, this evolved into me doing some amateur porn with a local producer, and although I was extremely nervous about it at first, I eventually became more confident and started to really enjoy the experiences. Most of what I had done was erotic massage, one of my favorite categories of porn. My partner LOVED it. He loved having documentation where I am pleasured, or where I am expertly stroking a cock. I loved the fact that my porn was being distributed and that men were jerking off watching me.

[FM] My experience shooting porn as (mostly) an amateur looking to scratch an exhibitionist itch

I wrote this immediately after shooting the video, but it was before I had actually seen the footage, so this writing is as best as I remembered it at the time, it is not a “novelization”. Meaning, all the events are all true, but I am sure I mixed up the order of events at some points.

**Preface**

Last year I saw an ad for a website that connects porn producers and performers. I had never done anything on film, or done anything ‘professionally’, but having a strong exhibitionist streak, I decided to check it out. One ad especially caught my eye, a local producer looking to shoot happy ending massage videos, which happen to be one of my favorite categories of porn. I love the moment the massage turns sexual, and the reveal of a hard cock. I also love porn where one person’s pleasure is the center of attention, I love the clinicalness, the transactionality. After watching a few of his videos and liking what I saw (good lighting, great cock), I worked up the courage to email him. It was a bit of a surreal experience, like writing a cover letter to give a handjob. I bragged about my abilities. I have been told I am quite skilled, and even quoted a friend who called me the “handjob queen”.