[M]y ex Ellie [F] on my couch

My favorite posts on here are the ones with some awkward bits that let me know they’re real. Sometimes I’m reading along and enjoying myself, only to find myself wondering – Wait a minute. Is she really so voluptuous and perma-horny, or so petite and perky and perma-horny? Is he really 6’3″ and chiseled with a dong the length and width of a Pringles can? Erotic fiction can be great, but I like it when I know a story actually happened. Here’s one.

Ellie was intense. Always got straight As, usually got her way, and was so paranoid I couldn’t quite believe she was serious. Like she’d say things like, “I don’t want you to sit with her. You’ll fall in love.” Like that was a normal conversation starter. Made for the kind of drama that almost seemed worth it when neither of us knew any better, but it got old pretty fast. She had a slightly rounded face that glowed when she smiled and looked pretty scary when her blue eyes stared at you, which was too often. She had full hips that I loved but that reminded her too much of her mom. Great, full breasts that were a little too sensitive for me to really play with. Her circulation wasn’t good, so her jiggly parts were usually cold. I liked to try to warm her up.

[M]y [f]irst kiss with Marie

The problem was that Marie and I had been part of a tight group of friends, including my girlfriend, who was now my ex. So after my breakup, even though we were both single, Marie’s friendship with my ex kept us from dating. We said we’d just hang out more, which we did increasingly often. Pretty soon we were spending more and more time at her dorm room, a double that she had to herself because her roommate lived with her boyfriend off campus.

You can probably see where this is going, and you’re right.

The thing is, we respected the boundary we’d set for ourselves not to mess around. Or was it that we wouldn’t actually have sex? We weren’t too precise with our wording, or maybe we just let the boundary drift as our desires dictated. The point is, though, we put some limits on ourselves. And god damn, did that make the whole experience more intense. I was twenty years old and had no idea holding back could add so much, and neither did she. But we learned.