I’m a sick fuk, but I was lonely and didn’t have moisturizer. I looked online for substitutes and came across one for olive oil and was like, “shit dogg, why not?”.
I made my way to the kitchen like a fiend and grabbed the first bottle that had a label for “olive oil” on it. Without reading the rest, I made haste as time was of the essence…you can figure the rest out.
About ten seconds of bliss came over me and then the waves of **furious fire** started. I thought my dick was having an allergic reaction when I re-read the bottle just to make sure. Sure enough the label read, “Southampton Chilli-Pepper Olive Oil”.
It was a long night after that… unrelentingly painful. *So, remember kids… always read the fine print!*