AnOpenTreasureChest, Author at NSFW story — Page 8 of 10

(28f) When I go too long without Sex… Masturbation Confessions. [F]

Due in no small part to the current state of the world and, more specifically, the series of UK wide lockdowns preventing any form of socialising, interaction with handsome strangers, or, crucially, getting within two meters of anyone you don’t already share a toilet seat with, I currently find myself in the torrid and frosty grip of the longest ‘dry spell’ of my life.

Which is to say quite simply; since losing my virginity, this is the single longest stretch of time I have lived through without having sex.

And I am *not* coping well.

Previous such dry spells have always been relatively easy things to remedy. Boyfriends would be a mere stones throw away and rarely requires more than a single consonant uttered in their direction before they’d be over and pants down. Frankly saying any word beginning with ‘F’ that sounded like a question was usually sufficient to provoke a response. Alternatively, if I was single and feeling the familiar pang of lonely loins I’d pop on a HIAATAMT dress (‘Hi, I’m Alice And These Are My Tits’, for the uninitiated) and head for an evening of socialising at a bar, and the situation would, eventually, come to its own happy conclusion. Read more »

The Walk of Shame and the Surprising Second Round – Fucking on the WoS [FM]

I’ve always found the so-called ‘Walk of Shame’ to be a surprisingly cathartic experience. There’s something wonderfully Zen and calming about stepping out into the crisp morning air still resplendant in the previous night’s finery. There’s nothing quite like some gentle sunlight and a morning breeze to soothe the rough edges of the inevitable hangover – Because, lets be honest, the illustrious Walk of Shame is rarely strutted without the intimate acquaintance of Mr Alcohol loitering – and allows the first moments of reflection on the evening’s antics, safe in the knowledge that you’re heading and and have once again managed to avoid losing a kidney to a lunatic on the black market..

…Or is that just me?

Perhaps I’m romanticising the situation a little (And I very much am. Living in England it’s rare even in the tender embrace of deepest Summer to wake up to such a serene and delightful day. British mornings are invariably freezing cold, overcast and drizzly, and you spend your walk lamenting on not bringing/losing your coat), but on the whole I do genuinely find a sense of peace and tranquility to the morning walk after a night of dubious debauchery. Read more »

(28f) The Birthday Treat – aka – The Hookup and his Housemate [MFM]

As far as I’m concerned, threesomes are the definitive version of sex. By this I mean MFM threesomes specifically, and not only because they place me squarely at the centre of attention.

It’s *mostly* that, but not entirely!

Which is not to say regular one-on-one sex isn’t wonderful. Clearly it’s one of the best ways of spending your time. But even the very best of a sexual pairings has moments in which the momentum relents – Pausing the action to change positions being the most common. Also, and I realise this may sound like something of a controversial statement, sometimes it can be prone to getting a little ‘samey’. Yes, there are multitude of positions, paces, intensities, etc. But ultimately it boils down to putting a thing in a hole. Yes, there can be some variety in the hole, but even then it’s one at a time.

Threesomes however increase those options exponentially. Suddenly there’s not only twice as many things that can be happening at any one time, but also near unlimited options for different combinations. In the same way that when you shuffle a deck of cards you’re likely to be creating a combination that has never before been seen in human history, no threesome (even if it’s the same individuals involved) tends to proceed in the same way twice. There’s always something going on, and there’s always a smorgasbord of options for what can be done *next*. Read more »

Fucking counts as exercise, right? [FM]

Cliches are awkward things when it comes to sex. Not unlike when making analogies, it’s generally speaking wise to avoid cliches like the plague. But, at the same time, cliches only become cliches due to their relative prevalence and popularity. Which is to say that something can, by definition, only become ‘stereotypical’ once it has been played through said stereo often enough that it’s become the norm.

An odd and heavily convoluted way to start off a supposedly sexual post, but bear with me. I’m going somewhere with this, I promise.

So broadly speaking avoiding engaging in cliched activity is best. Forge your own path and ignore the ground well trodden and all that. Great advice.

But when it comes to sex I can’t help but feel that the perspective needs to shift somewhat. Why? Because, as discussed, things become cliche due to popularity. And things tend to be popular because they’re fun, hence why they’re done so widely and so often repeated. Ergo if you spend your life trying to ultimately avoid all of the sexual cliches then you’re likely doing yourself out of a great many fun experiences. As fun as it is to always strive for originality, the simple fact is that sometimes you’ve got to allow yourself to indulge in a classic cliche every now and again. Read more »

My New Year’s Resolution: Give up Casual Sex. I broke it within 25 minutes. [FM]

Ah, New Year. What finer opportunity to decide on some optimistic yet arbitrary life goals that, unless you possess a will far stronger than my own, you’ll have long since given up on by the end of the month. A somewhat cynical viewpoint, I know. But given a mere year ago I found myself breaking my one and only resolution to supposedly ‘better’ myself within half an hour of the bells chiming, I feel cynicism is realistically my only option.

New Years Eve 2019. On the cusp of 2020 which, being as it is a lovely sounding number, was sure to be the year that would bring only wonderful things. A year of optimism. Of hope. of unparalleled success and opportunity. And, personally speaking, the year I had very much intended to, as the old parlance goes; ‘get my shit together’.

I’d spent a significant portion of 2019 in an excellent relationship and, if I may be immodest for a moment, having excellent sex. The sort that, while perhaps not as relentlessly thrilling as with new and unknown partners, includes all the benefits of someone who understands your likes and dislikes, and who is more than comfortable playing to their strengths, and allows you to play to your own too. Read more »

A Festive Fucking (28F) [FM]

(Aka; A true tale of festive fuckery told in a manner befitting the season)

‘Twas a few nights before Christmas and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
But that’s not strictly true, as something *was* stirring,
For under a duvet a vibrator was whirring.
I was attempting to relieve my frustration,
By applying some liberal clitoral stimulation.
Though I was having success, and my toes they did twitch,
It just wasn’t enough to fully scratch the itch.
I sought something more substantial in her Christmas stocking,
To put it quite bluntly, I needed a cock-ing.
For a festive family gathering is great, with one snag,
It presents next to no opportunities to shag.
I’d been home for three days; a Christmas vacation,
And my sex life had halted, a total cessation.
Until then I’d been active, after all, ’tis the season,
Not that I needed to justify the reason.
In short, I was horny. I needed some action,
To get out and find some mutual attraction.
So despite the later hour, and some of my family sleeping,
Out of the house I found myself creeping.
(It wasn’t that late. Maybe just gone twelve?
Certainly enough time for my plans not to shelve)
Wrapped up in layers, looking quite the sight,
I ventured out into the cold winter’s night… Read more »