Right a[F]ter [M]y first breakup (xpost from r/sluttyconfessions)

*In March of 2019, my freshman year, I ended my high school relationship. It was a bad long distance relationship, and he was my first partner. Ever since, I have sort of been on a terrible binge with hookups. While I’m honestly enjoying myself, I’m also pretty embarrassed, and can’t share these stories with anyone else in my life. But, reading stories online made me want to share with some people who’d enjoy them. So, I decided to go back through my journal entries, and tell you all a bit about some of the adventures I’ve been having. I’ll be sharing them over the coming weeks. Names are fictional for anonymity.*

Tom and I had been dating for three years, and he was the first guy I had ever been with. In retrospect, the sex was pretty tame. I only realized after spending the last six months trying out a lot more.

I’m 19 now. This all happened about six months ago. I was 18 at the time, in my second semester at college. I’m at a private university in a major city on the East coast, but for anonymity am not going to say much more. I’m 5’4”, about 110lbs, with dark brown straight hair. I’ve been told I’m pretty cute, and have nice hips, and a bit of curve. I like my skin a lot, and am feeling pretty proud of how I look right now. I really work hard on my appearance, and work out a lot.

Tom broke up with me out of nowhere. I guess I should have seen it coming because long distance had not been going well for us. In my first semester, he cheated on me, but clearly felt guilty about it, and told me immediately. But it put a rift between us, and that, along with the heartache of long distance had turned me into a terrible, clingy, paranoid and jealous girlfriend, unfortunately. But then he called me, and told me he wanted to end it.

And it took me a few days to process that. I was sad at first, but then, I just sort of felt numb. And excited by the thought that I could hook up with other people. I realized at some point in our relationship that I was way more sexual than him. I also realized that I had a huge creampie and breeding kink that he had indulged just once, because I wasn’t on birth control (which was stupid but we were drunk when it happened). And there are some times in my cycle where that just turns into this gnawing need inside me. Like I can feel my desire deep in my belly, whenever I see a guy I’m attracted to. And I was feeling this the day Tom broke up with me. Like I couldn’t look at a hot guy playing with a dog, or using his hands, without feeling that churning in me, and I’d immediately start thinking about how badly I needed him inside me, and to cum in me.

So like everyone ending their first relationship, I almost immediately got on a popular dating app, one that involves a fair amount of swiping. I didn’t really have any intentions. I just felt rejected, turned on, and lonely. And I swiped aimlessly for a while until I came to a guy who was my type. He was a big guy – he clearly dwarfed other people in a few photos, and I loved how his arms looked, and how perfectly folded the sleeves on his shirt were. Plus we were only a mile apart. His profile was pretty bland, but I was happy when we matched after I swiped right on him.

I was feeling bold, so I immediately messaged him, and told him I needed a drink. The conversation turned flirtatious pretty quickly, and from there turned a lot more sexual. He told me how he wanted to run his hands over my legs under the table. How he wanted to touch me, tease me in public, where we risk anyone seeing. All of that was getting me really worked up, and I told him I wanted to get that drink immediately.

But then he said we weren’t going to get drinks. That we were going to meet up, and he was going to fuck me without saying a word. To be honest, his boldness turned me on even more, but the prospect made me a lot more nervous. He wanted to come over to my place and just take me. I told him I’d rather meet somewhere public first. He told me we should compromise, and we’d meet at a park right by our neighborhood that was usually pretty dark at night, and he’d take me there.

I agreed, but then immediately regretted it. I thought about unmatching him and just leaving it there. But I was also really really excited about the prospect. I had started touching myself during our conversation, and it was really really hard not to come right then and there. But the thought of him using me was getting me more and more worked up, so I finally stopped, without finishing, and put on a short dress that went down to about my mid thigh, with no bra or panties on underneath. I was feeling slutty, hot, and needy. I couldn’t stop thinking about how I needed him to cum in me, needed to feel him fill me. So I messaged him this and he told me to meet him in 20 minutes in the park.

I knew it was stupid to not use protection. I wasn’t on birth control, and I’m pretty sure I was ovulating. But I also couldn’t think straight at all. All I knew is that I needed him to fuck me harder than I’d ever been fucked before. That I needed him to take me and cum in me. That I needed to feel him throb, feel him fill me. As I walked to the park, I thought about turning around several times, but each time I tried, I looked back at our conversation and kept going.

I got to the area we were supposed to meet, by some brick storage buildings, a few minutes early, and nervously flipped through my phone. My legs were shaking at this point. I had never been with anyone except my boyfriend, and this guy wanted to fuck me without even knowing me. It was honestly the most anxious I had ever felt. And then suddenly, I heard someone walking behind me. When I turned around, he was almost to me.

True to his word, he didn’t say a thing, he just looked me up and down, taking me in, and then suddenly grabbed me by the neck. In that moment, I just melted. I felt like I would do anything to please him. He pushed me back into the alley, and shoved me against the wall roughly. I could see people walking by, maybe 30 feet away where there was a brightly lit path, but I didn’t even care at this point, and I don’t think they could see us. He ran a hand over me, squeezing my chest, then just grabbed me, turned me around, and lifted up my dress.

I felt him unzip, and felt his cock run along my ass and pussy for a second before he suddenly pushed into me, slowly. I felt like the world was just coming down on me. I couldn’t think straight. It was pure pleasure. I think he grabbed me over the mouth with one hand, and another on my hips, but honestly, I don’t even know if I knew what was happening. He took me hard. Harder than Tom had ever fucked me. It was like he barely even cared about me. He just used me. I was biting on his fingers in my mouth to keep quiet, and was just in pure bliss. I was losing it. Suddenly he took his hand off my mouth, and I just started begging, “please daddy, fill me, cum inside me.” he grabbed my hips with both hands, pushed into me harder, and I felt him start to swell and throb, and then I just lost it. I felt wave after wave of pleasure come over me as he came deep into me. It felt like so much cum, like the moment was just going and going, as he slowed down. I felt like I was seeing stars. I couldn’t think at all, just felt him pulse into me.

He sat there a second, pinning me to the wall, panting. Then I felt him pull out me, and felt his cum start to run down my leg. I started to turn, but he was zipping up and just walking away.

I couldn’t move. I just leaned against the wall for a while, until I found the energy to pull out my phone to thank him. But when I got into the app, he had already unmatched me.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/ctkvhv/right_after_my_first_breakup_xpost_from