[f] For /u/DeLiBaKiS, who disappeared on me…

Hi Alex,

I hope you might read this one day, and I hope you’re alright. I wanted to write this to your personally, but you deleted your Account, and I hope it’s not my fault. But, to answer your question:

I think I know a thing or two about guys and happiness. It is not very complicated. And I learned pretty early on, I have already told you about high school, but it was the first year at Uni that I really learned.

Finally away from home and fussy catholic parents and small town stuff where you couldn’t sneeze without someone noticing. I was on my own. Free. I could indulge myself, the self with no space at home.

If you suck a guy’s dick, he will be happy. Maybe not forever, but for long enough. If you do it again, or especially regularly, it could well be a long time, although things can get complicated quickly and I usually didn’t want to deal with complications back then.

You have heard my baseline story enough, I have bent your ear in the past and you were one of the few who I think actually listened. Or cared. Or acted like you cared anyway. I was never pretty, always just ‘the cute one’, got teased for my looks from kindergarden on, and when all the other girls started to get chests in sixth or seventh grade, I was not one of them.

Short, glasses, thin hair, skinny legs, and not even a real butt back then. I did not get a chest to speak of during High School. All the rest of the package was boring, totally uninteresting, with so-so grades, never very good with words or funny or sports or anything, felt like I was the last one in the room, always.

I watched all the town teenagers match up, the jock guys and the pretty, smug, stuck-up girls with their long blonde hair. The smart kids, even the other losers. It wasn’t like I was dying with envy, I couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to be desired or anything. It was just the way it was.

I got a glimmer with a couple guys in high school, one fairly early as a sophomore, but it fizzled so badly no one would take a chance on me til the senior year, and then I found myself a few times at parties upstairs in some dark room on my knees in front of some shit-faced guy with his dick in my mouth.

But I liked it. It turned out I really liked it. I figured if the guy’s cock in front of me was hard he had to have some interest in me. Or part of me anyway. Of course I had heard a couple girls brag about sucking someone off, but I didn’t have any close enough friends who had done that and didn’t get the details, just that their status went up when they could say they had sucked John Forman or some big stud’s cock.

But if you have a hard cock in your mouth, getting ready to spurt, you know you have that guy’s attention. At least for that moment there is nobody more important in the world than you. And I liked that feeling, however momentary it would end up being, and for some guys, momentary is just that and some guys would just get creeped out and treat you funny after they just creamed your mouth. Still don’t understand it. Do the guy a favor, exactly what he wants, and then he gets weird on you.

But having a hard eager cock in my mouth is just about my favorite thing in the world. Better than ice cream, a good meal out, a good night’s sleep. And you can do it a lot more often than any of the rest of those things too.

You and just about everyone else asked me if I swallowed cum from the beginning and of course not. It is just too weird the first couple of times to do that, with a mouthful of warm sperm for the first time, and I guarantee you for anyone on the first time it takes you by surprise, no matter how much you know what is going to happen, and you yank your mouth away while the cock is still going off and even feel a bit funny about the whole business and of course then there is cum all over the place.

And it is a fucking mess. But back then, given the situation, there was the clean up business and usually neither I or the guy had handkerchiefs or anything and we were scared shitless that we would leave some sign in somebody’s parent’s house that there was some sex going on and there would be trouble and everything, so it just got to be easier to swallow. Dispose of the evidence. Didn’t have to use a t-shirt or some extra piece of clothing that then smelled like semen anyway. Nothing more than that, it was just tidier to swallow. My biggest worry was that my mom would smell sperm on my breath when I got home but that never happened.

But guys liked cumming in my mouth. More than I ever imagined. I am not one of those to say that I like cum, the taste and feel and all that crap, it is just part of the deal, and I have adapted so it doesn’t bother me. More than one guy has said that cumming in a girl’s mouth is better than fucking anyway, that a girl’s mouth is always just way more talented than a cunt and can do more things that make for a memorable climax, and some guys seem to get off on the visuals of a girl doing him too. And those were the times I got compliments, cause I was good. I had found out I was real good at something.

It was almost like I had nothing to lose, and it just became a game to see how much I could enjoy myself. And making a guy happy was plenty enjoyable. They just wanted pleasure, and I could do that. It was a no pressure situation if you know what I mean.

Usually I wasn’t set on having my own climax, although that was nice when it happened, although it turned out I was fussy how it happened or even who could do it. But making a guy’s cock go off, go from soft to hard to raging hard to frantically spitting semen, that I could pretty much guarantee, at least one time for each guy.

That is not quite true what I said about not liking cum in my mouth. It is not the cum that is exciting, and some guy’s cum is pretty dreadful tasting stuff, so you learn it is not the taste, but the fact that it happened, and that is what you focus on. I have learned how to take it so that the guy is happy, and boy, they can sure be happy when they squirt in my mouth.

I do like it when he is in the act of coming. I like the way his dick changes hardness, usually just before he goes off, and his dickhead gets just a bit bigger, and I can usually tell by how he is moving his legs, even better when he is moaning or saying stuff, when things are about to happen. And the pulsing when the sperm shoots out, that is real fine. Like having a thick live snake in your mouth and knowing you have made it spit. I am not much a fan of a big penis. You can do a lot more stuff, usually have a lot more fun with a middle size penis, but if it is really big, I still would way rather suck it than get fucked.

Which is another issue.

I am not very big, in any dimensions. It is not a thickness thing, I have had a pile of good thick cocks up me, some of them real nice, but the long ones, unless the guy is careful tend to bang into the back of me, and it is not comfortable. And I will tell you that most guys with big dicks are not careful types anyway, so l learned early on all the ways to deal with them so it worked out for me, and them.

About the things I don’t like.

Well, there are a bunch, some more than others. I prefer clean, or halfway clean, at least not tasting of piss. Circumcised guys often have an edge there. I don’t mind strong smell, but also don’t like overclean, like with soap taste.

The one thing that guarantees I will never suck you again is the hand on the back of my head. I do not fucking know why so many guys think this is a brilliant move, maybe they have seen it in porn or something and they think it is manly or who knows. But if you put your hand on the back of my head and try to force me onto your dick you are done. Maybe I will finish you, but never again, and there are times when I just bailed out right then, especially if I didn’t like the guy much to begin with anyway.

Make an excuse to go to the bathroom to pee or something, get my stuff and clear out. Another reason I always traveled light and always had my stuff in one easy to reach place. I think every guy should suck a dick at least once, and if they ever had that done to them while they were sucking, they would learn that you just don’t do that. Let me handle stuff and all will be fine. Don’t push my head down on your fucking dick. At least not if I don’t ask you for it.

That is how it all is supposed to be. No complications, just good hard intense pleasure.

I hope I could answer the things you wanted me to answer. I hope you’re better, and have just deleted your Account because something good happened in your life, not something bad.

If you are still out there, I’d appreciate if you’d shoot me a note – but if you don’t want that, I can understand.

Alina~

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/cpoana/f_for_udelibakis_who_disappeared_on_me