This is embarrassing to admit, but I am 28 years old, and until recently I had never climaxed with a guy, and it was starting to bother me. I’ve been having orgasms since I was 15 or so, first with another girl, then by myself. But no matter how much I was in to the guy, or how much he tried, I’ve never been able to get there with just a guy. I’ve studied this a bit, and I guess it’s a pattern with rape victims. Lots of girls who were raped young can only climax with a guy if they are the one on top during sex, never missionary. But even being on top didn’t work for me. I was starting to think it was something I would never experience.
I happened to be scrolling through Reddit posts one night, and I came across one by u/maydoporn, which led me to another by u/smallandtan and one by u/dancinggal1980. They each described experiences they had at a place called “Club Secret” in Vegas where they were gangbanged in public for a lot of money. I wasn’t as much interested in the insane amount of money they got paid as I was how, even with a group of strangers, they apparently had these great, fulfilling orgasms just through heterosex. I wondered if they had used some sort of drugs or something to help them along, but they assured me it was just the raw sex that worked. I started to wonder if maybe a similar experience would work for me.
As another detail, I’ve had this boyfriend I have really been into for almost a year. Let’s call him Mike. We have sex all the time, and I love it, but he can’t quite get me there. It’s like there’s a roadblock. So after talking with him about it, we brought another girl, an acquaintance of mine he didn’t know, into our bed. I have him enter me while I’m facing away from him (doggy style), then we lie back on the bed so I’m on top of him, but facing away. The girl, let’s call her “Jane”, then licks my clit with him inside my pussy until I come. This works, and I love it, because it is the first time I’ve ever been able to come with a man inside me, and I really do like this guy and love sharing that intimacy with him, even though Jane has to be there too in order to make it work.
But then I read these stories from these ladies who were so fulfilled at Club Secret, and I talked with Jane about it too, and she suggested she bring her FWB and a couple other guys over to give me that Club Secret type of experience. I was curious, but hesitant. My first priority was to have a normal, orgasm-filled sex life with my boyfriend. My hope was that maybe trying something outside-the-box could be a step to get me there. But I didn’t think I was ready for a full on gangbang, especially since I have always struggled with anal and had never been double penetrated. So I said I’d talk to my boyfriend about a foursome kind of thing with Mike, Jane, and Jane’s FWB, where maybe Jane could take a step back and I could try to climax with just the two guys. So I talked to Mike, and he said whatever I needed to work this thing through was okay with him. So we set up a night when the four of us would get together.
Mike got us a nice suite at a hotel with three rooms and a private jacuzzi on a large balcony. Mike and I got there in the afternoon so I could “warm up.” Both guys had read the Club Secret stories, so, without actually discussing it, I knew they would be dp’ing me and I needed to be ready for it. So Mike spent a few hours helping me do anal prep, and I’ve linked to a couple pictures of that part of the story below, just to help you know this isn’t all a bunch of BS (I know it’s not “proof,” but it’s something). I was actually getting pretty excited and very aroused knowing I was going to soon have sex that was more primal than anything I had done before.
Not that it usually matters, but in this case it does: Mike is well-endowed for a white guy. He’s almost nine inches at his max, although not huge in girth. I don’t care much, I’d love him if he were a little five-inch guy, but I have found it nice that he never has to “compensate” like some guys do who seem to need to prove themselves every time. He’s comfortable with himself and his “equipment.”
Around nine o’clock that night, right as planned, Jane arrived with her friend, “Ty.” Ty was not what I had in mind. He was a really big guy, and I won’t go into details, but he was just different than I was expecting. But we all said “hi” and exchanged pleasantries. We all had a drink, then Jane took the lead and took her clothes off and stood in frond of us naked and started fingering herself. The three of us were a bit more deliberate, but we all stripped down. I watched as Ty pulled his pants off, curious what I’d be receiving. He was big, and I started to get a little worried. Jane got on her knees and started sucking him to get him full-sized, and I got scared. Ty was huge, at least two inches longer and a lot bigger around than Mike. I wasn’t sure I could handle him, but I was committed at this point. I was so thankful for the hours of anal prep I’d had. I was hoping it would be enough to at least keep me from tearing and hopeful let me handle the pain. I sucked Mike until he was erect, which only took a few seconds, and then I got on my back at the edge of the bed for him to start into me vaginally. I had planned on receiving a bunch of oral first, but after seeing Ty, I wanted to make sure I was stretched and ready with something I was used to before handling him. I wanted to make sure Mike readied me first. Mike pumped my pussy for several minutes, then Jane stood up and pulled him aside so Ty could start in to me. Ty was gentle, but he reached my cervix before getting all the way in, and there was some sharp pain as he bottomed out. I screamed out and pushed him back. He laughed and pulled back out, then pumped me without going all the way in. It was still uncomfortable for a couple minutes until I strethed enough to fit his girth, and a few times he bottomed out again and I involuntarily let out a little cry.
Meanwhile, Jane went down on Mike to keep him hard while he waited his turn to work me again. Eventially, Mike pulled back from Jane and grabbed the bottle of lube we were using earlier for the dildos we were stretching my ass with. She poured some in her hand and and coated his cock with it. “Get on all fours,” Jane told me. I was glad to have a break from Ty, even if it meant doing anal with Mike. Ty pulled back and I stood up, taking my time and enjoying the pause. I was feeling a little weak-kneed already. I got on all fours at the edge of the bed with my feet hanging off the bed’s end so the guys could stand and I could pull away. Mike worked his way into me anally, going very slow and gentle, adding more lube, until finally he was all the way in, thrusting his full length in and out. After he had me fully stretched to his size, he pulled out so Ty could take his turn. I got tense and gritted my teeth. I have had guys just as big as Ty vaginally, but it was always miserable and I would just close my eyes and silently beg for it to be over. But this was way more than I’d ever done through the back door. Ty seemed aware of it: “Let’s stretch this bitch” he said as he worked himself into me. I had made up my mind to just bite my lip and stay silent, but I couldn’t. I screamed out after he was only a couple inches in, and again every time he pushed deeper up my asshole. I tried rocking forward to get relief and make him go more slowly, but Ty grabbed my hips to hold me still as he forced his way into me. Jane had wiped Mike down and was noisily trying to keep him distracted while I dealt with the searing pain of getting stretched open. After Ty got himself all the way in he sped up his thrusts and I rhythmically screamed to every one. It never stopped hurting, but I could feel myself loosening up to accommodate his pole. The female body is pretty amazing.
“She’s loving it!” Jane said. She directed Mike onto his back on the bed as Ty pulled out and stood there. I was dripping in sweat, from the heat of the guys but mostly from giving everything in me to endure the pounding Ty had given me. Things had gotten to where I was the submissive one and Jane and Ty were in charge. I knew I was going to get dp’d next and I had gotten things to the point where I was just going to have to deal with whatever they were going to do. I turned around to try to take Mike in my ass so Ty would get my pussy, but Jane said, “Oh, come on, give your boyfriend a kiss!” I did what I was told, knowing Mike would end up in my pussy and Ty would destroy my asshole, but Jane had taken charge. I climbed on Mike and slid him into me, giving him a kiss like Jane had instructed me and then leaning forward to await Ty. He entered me swiftly and forcefully, and I screamed out as I started receiving my first DP. Ty hurt a lot, but Mike felt really good, and I had spent so much effort trying to take Ty already that I didn’t have anything left to fight back with or even try to contortion my body to lessen the pain. I just whimpered as the two men worked me, and I realized I was actually breaking down and letting go. I started “finding my zen” in the middle of the pain Ty was inflicting on me, and I started focusing on Mike in my pussy and, to my surprise, I started feeling that circling feeling of an approaching orgasm. My clit was pressed into Mike’s pelvic bone, and Ty’s rhythmic thrusts, incredibly painful though they were, were causing my clit to get rubbed just right. I was still crying out from the pain with each thrust from Ty when suddenly I started moaining/screaming/crying as the waves of an orgasm shook me. Both men just kept going, and within a minute a second series of orgasm waves took me. By now I could hear myself cry out with each thrust, and the pain was still there, but I had become partially disassociated from my body and it seemed like I was just there watching myself. I could feel a third wave of orgasms coming, but my body was too worn out to release them and there was just sort of a moment of a pleasant feeling that displaced the pain. Once that was gone, the pain from Ty’s relentless thrusts returned stronger than ever, and I wanted it to be over. I knew Mike would stop the proceedings if I asked, but at this point I felt compelled to let them both finish. You never feel right stopping sex just because you finished first! So I just took the pounding for a while, then suddenly things started to spin, then fade, and I blacked out.
The next thing I knew, I was lying on my back in the bed. The three of them were talking and one of them was in the bathroom. I could feel cum seeping out of my pussy and my asshole, so I knew both guys had finished in me. I was glad for Mike, but I was wishing Ty would have pulled out first. Jane suggested we all use the jacuzzi, and Mike agreed. I think Ty did too, but I sort of blacked out again.
When I came to, Ty was pulling me by the legs to the edge of the bed. He was hard again, and he quickly rammed his tree trunk into my pussy. I tried to gently push him back, not to say “no, no sex,” but to say “please, not so deep.” But he pushed my hand away and went in as hard as he could. I cried out as he hit my cervix. Then he pulled my right leg up so my knee was almost to my chin. I don’t know how every big-dicked guy knows about this, but they do. It seems to pull your cervix closer to the entrance and makes sex as painful as possible. Then he rammed me as hard as he could as I whimpered. Jane and Mike were out in the jacuzzi, and I just had to lie there and take it. He pumped me just slowly enough to keep himself from coming. After maybe ten minutes and hundreds of thrusts, Jane walked back into the room, naked and dripping wet. “The whore wanted more, eh? Sounds like she’s loving it!” He sped up his thrusts while Jane watched, and finally I heard myself shriek as he pushed my leg all the way into my face and forced himself in as far as he could go while he drained his balls into me. I can never feel a guy ejaculating into my vagina — I don’t think I have nerve endings that deep, but I could tell he was trying to keaglw in order to get every last sperm he could as deep into me as possible, like he was breeding me. He remained there for a while, then finally pulled out and took a step back. I lowered my leg down, but he grabbed it put it back up, then moved my other leg too so I was spread eagle. Apparently I wasn’t supposed to close my legs together, I had to leave myself opened up so his handiwork could be on display. I felt the cum slowly start to seep, and I really wanted to try to will it out of me. He stood victoriously over my dripping pussy for a good minute while small talking with Jane.
Ty started pulling on his pants, and then Mike walked into the room, wrapped in a towel. As soon as I saw him I put my legs down, but I know he saw me holding myself open in front of Ty and Jane. Ty was wiping his dick off with a dry washcloth before pulling has pants up all the way, obviously having just fucked me. I felt awkward, like I had just cuckolded Mike. I wanted to disappear. I didn’t have a towel or anything, so I had to put my hand over my pussy to catch the cum as it rushed out of me while I stood up to walk toward the bathroom. Unfortunately Mike headed into the bathroom ahead of me and closed the door, so there I stood in front of Ty and Jane with my hand covered in cum and more dripping out of my pussy and down my leg. I wobbled toward my clothes and pulled my dress back on so at least I wasn’t naked, but I felt disgusting and embarrassed. “Thanks for coming,” I told them, which meant “please leave.” Ty stood in front of my with his dick still hanging out looking me in the eyes with an “I owned you, cunt” look while he put his shirt on slowly, then he put his thing away. I got the message. They left and Mike and I watched TV before a sexless night’s sleep. I got the orgasms I wanted, but everything else fell apart. I still feel funny about it with Mike, and I don’t ever want to see Jean or Ty again.
Me using saliva for the first (smallest) toy we used to prep me: [https://imgur.com/DoJey3R](https://imgur.com/DoJey3R)
Insertion pic: https://imgur.com/s044Dk8
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/8hka3t/mmf_f28just_had_first_heterosex_orgasm_but_with
You had an emotional flashback to your memory of rape, I’m afraid. That was the part where you felt your conscious self separate from your physical self. It’s a defense mechanism the psyche uses to survive extreme trauma.
And honestly, this 4-some was about as close to consentual rape as one can get, IMO. So it’s not surprising that you felt violated enough to trigger the dissociation.
Your reasons for pursuing this encounter are understandable. And the fact that you didn’t call a stop to the proceedings even though you wanted to fits with both your commitment to follow through on an agreement and the traits of a victim of sexual violence. However, giving away all power to control what was happening to your body wasn’t really fair to those parts of yourself that had been brutalized in the past. More caution in choosing participants, setting ground rules (safety words!) and easing into situations like this is recommended. If you ever decide to try this kind of thing again, that is.
A professional Domme or at least experienced roleplayer with whom you can build trust over time and that will take you through the process step by step would probably be a more healthy option in the future. Better yet, a psychotherapist that specializes in helping abuse victims through sexual health issues.
In any case, I hope there are more life-affirming orgasms in your future.
Hi. <<Mike is well-endowed for a white guy. He’s almost nine inches>>
Just so you know, that is massive for any race and any guy.