# 1
D: You know that group of boys in 11a?
M: The backyard boys?
D: Heh, don’t call them that to their faces. But yes.
M: Why, they hang around by the bike racks and play hearts!
D: They moved on to poker this year, and they’re not boys anymore.
M: Certainly not men yet.
D: Getting there … Certainly legal.
M: Creep. Seriously, you are the worst they could have picked to help out with PE.
***
D: So your fan club.
M: Huh?
D: *The Backyard Boys*
M: Please, I’m trying to prepare for my next class.
D: Why?
M: Not everyone is a born bullshit artist like you. And I do not have a fan club.
D: I was just born ready.
M: Good for you. Now shut up and let me do my job.
D: Gosh! Fine.
D: …
M: *What?*
D: Nothing.
M: Danielle … ?
D: They have a group chat: *MissMyersMelons*. Major props on the alliteration, looks like they learned something from you at least.
M: shut up.
D: Though I’d imagine you’d just mark them for the missing possessive.
M: shut. up. not in here. come.
***
M: Miss Myers’s Melons?
D: Told you, no possessive. And apparently MelaniesMelons was discussed, but passed on for being to personal. Art never wins. From what I’ve seen it’s more of a general theme than a hard limit though.
M: Wait, WHAT?
D: Obviously they love your jugs. But your legs and ass have ferv …
M: From what you have seen?!
D: Hush. Yes: I’ve seen. Nuhuhuh! Won’t tell you any more than that. As I was about to say, of course it started with the obvious. But I imagine as they developed their individual tastes, personal collections started to vary.
M: I … it is disgusting.
D: I’d find it flattering. They’re…
M: Don’t give me any of your *boys will be boys* bullshit. It is sexist, predatory stalking. For fuck’s sake, they are all just one swipe away from the prettiest pixies taking three guys at once in HD. Why me?
D: Melanie. Even VR porn isn’t real, six feet in front of you, bending over to pick up her chalk from the floor.
M: No! Do not …
D: Or walking around with a big foodstain on her shirt peeking out of her v-neck sweater.
M: Fuck you.
D: You’re a clumsy girl, Mel.
D: Bye!
***
# 2
M: I feel like you’re egging me on to something here.
D: Bullshit. Confront the problem: Sound professional advice.
M: Pha… you’re even less of a professional than me. Give me a break.
D: I know more about men than you.
M: … I would debate that.
D: Anytime!
M: …
D: Coward! Cause you know you’d loose.
M: I have to go. Can’t be late for my office hour.
D: No, not for this one. Have fun!
M: Fuck you Danielle.
***
# 3
D: This your first reunion?
M: Five years. Shit man, we’re getting old.
D: Right, you started after me. Mine was last year.
M: Not sure I wanna to go.
D: Oh come on, don’t leave me hangin!
M: It was … an interesting class.
D: Right! *The Backyard Boys*.
M: Ooh … don’t call’m that, Dee.
***
M: Yous caused me a shitload of trouble back then.
X: Oh, I know.
Y: I guess so. Sorry Mrs Myers.
M: Mel. And sorry my ass. It was full on sexual harrassment!
Y: Talk about you.
M: Seriously?
Y: That meeting?
D: You made’m all hold hands.
M: Hihi. Oh I forgot ’bout that one.
Z: Most embarrassing moment of my life.
M: Pha, you’d earned it and then some. If I remember correctly, *you* and *you* were busy playing pocket pool ‘stead of listening to the scolding I was dishing out. All yous, probably.
Y: Heh, don’t you try pull that shit on us again.
M: No sweat. Would be unfair: Half of you would go limp before it’s your turn.
D: Mel, shut up and help me.
Y: She’s right Mrs Myers. Here, time to use that filthy mouth of yours for something useful.
M: [slurp]
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/7jn76r/mfmiss_myers_melons_being_the_education_of_a