First off, I’ll say that I had been curious of exploring gay sex since I was in middle school. I’d sleep over at friends houses & hope to see them naked or be able to not get caught looking at guys in the gym locker room in high school as I led a completely straight lifestyle dressing the skater part. I always was attracted to girls, but had a strong curiosity to mess around with guys. I had messed around with boys when I was much younger, which can hold off for another post, but I’ll just say there was exploring of bodies, holes, dicks…
I got through high school having girlfriends & partying while coming home drunk to get online & look at gay/bi porn & chat with guys on aol. This continued through my first years of college, where I had just wished to meet a guy who would take the lead, but I was always too nervous of someone finding out. Finally, after many years of shame & guilt for my desires I was open to the idea that I should meet someone to explore my sexuality. I had made post on CL in the past, but all the dudes that responded just wanted to meet up & get off & bounce. I wasn’t looking for a relationship, but was looking for some respect to take it slow & allow myself to open up as I’m an introvert who needs to feel trust before baring the boxers.
I began to chat with a guy & we’d cam & share pictures. He understood my stance of needing to take things slow, but did not live in the area. But he knew a kid [Jimmy] that lived in my area who was gay & really down to earth. He introduced us & Jimmy & I set up to meet up. I lived near the ocean so we met up & chatted for a couple hours. I felt that I could trust him & he was kind. That night we did not hook up, but my curiosity & eagerness mixed with nervousness overloaded me. If we hooked up, did that mean I was gay? No, but my shameful mind continued to tell me it was. I was tired of holding this closet desire inside (I still have the same feelings, but is not as strong).
Jimmy & I continued to text. Then one night after quite a few cocktails, I invited him over. Being nervous is an understatement, but the booze helped with letting it loose. I was so fucking turned on that I was about to play with another man. I had always thought that I’d be a top, but also had the curiosity to bottom. I began to undress him to his boxers & he did the same to me. We were both hard & I placed my hand on his cock. We laid on my bed & instinctively we began to make out. I took my hand down his boxers & was amazed at the warmth & softness of his dick. I was so turned on. We both got naked & continued to make out. I can’t recall who went down on one another first, but I remember putting his warm dick in my mouth & how great it felt. That night ended with both of us getting off & an amazing relief I felt that going through with it. There was a sense of liberation.
Jimmy & I continued to hook up off & on for a couple years, while I continued to live the straight lifestyle & hook up with girls. Jimmy was one of the coolest guys I’ve known & took it slow with me. We eventually did everything. I fucked him, he fucked me, we 69’d, it was hot! Unfortunately Jimmy was gay & was looking for a relationship. Something I was unable to offer him. It’s a bummer that I have not found another “Jimmy” to explore each other while I can lead my straight lifestyle eating pussy as I desire. Of course the ultimate goal would be find a girl who is open the bbg lifestyle & open. I’ve yet to find someone I can open up about this type of subject. I hope one day soon, the universe will place someone into my life.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/xbat06/32_m_college_curiosity_skater_boi