Like all households, our grocery bill has been uncomfortably high lately. This was always a touchy subject with us as I do not cook and hate grocery shopping. My husband loves cooking and doesn’t seem to mind it, but we don’t have a car so we’re naturally limited by what he can carry… Plus he insists on buying way too much healthy food.
My solution? I am always down to order groceries and pay the premium.
*We make enough money, but my husband is cheap.*
So we got into a fight over this the other day because for the tenth time I suggested we just order fucking groceries. He got angry and said he could handle it and with the prices going up he was not about to pay even more. I pointed out that we always run out of food and he never buys things I don’t have to cook.
“We have ten packs of macaroni and cheese, Viola! Ten!” He finally yelled.
“Macaroni and cheese is still cooking!”
“What? It’s like 4 steps!”
“Exactly! I have to boil water and then cook the pasta and then drain the water AND add cheese! Im not a trained chef!”
My husband stared at me for a second and then burst out laughing as he lunged at me. We started making out as he giggled, and reared his head back to smile.
“What foods are suitable to your cooking aversion?” He said in between kisses as he pulled me down on the couch so he could climb on top of me.
“Chicken tenders or like anything I can microwave.”
“Can I get you microwaved vegetables?”
“No! That defeats the purpose!”
He started kissing my neck and reached his hand up my shirt. “You have to eat vegetables, V! We have to keep you healthy because I’m not growing old alone.”
“I’m a fucking marathon runner.”
“I’ve seen you make a pizza burrito.”
“I stand by my choices.” I said as I pulled his shirt off.
“If I go down on you to completion will you let me make you broccoli?”
“If I go down on you to completion will you let me order McDonalds?”
“I’ll put cheese on the broccoli.”
That was it though. At this point he was pinching my nipples and making me whimper. “I’ll eat whatever you want. Just fuck me.”
“Whatever I want?” He laughed.
“Fuck me, please!”
“Beg more.”
I reached my hand into his pants and started stroking him. “I love your penis so much and I desperately need it inside of me.”
“Mmmmmm, tell me more.”
“Jesus, just fuck me.”
He pulled off my shirt, unhooked my bra, and put his mouth to my chest. “I’m going to make you tofu bites with sautéed vegetables and rice. You’re going to eat it and you’re going to like it.”
“Fine dude, pleaaase. I need you.”
He started laughing and finally pulled my pants down. “I love it when you’re so desperate for my dick you promise to eat like and adult.”
“God damn it! Fuck me.”
He thrust into me and I finally moaned and threw my hand to his back and started clawing. He pinned my hands to my side and thrust again. “No, you’re going to take it like this and look at me when you come.”
“Fuck,” I groaned as he kept thrusting in and out.
He went harder then and I groaned, pinned under him as he thrusted in and out. “I love it when you’re helpless.”
“You feel so good,” I whimpered as I felt myself building. I groaned and shuddered beneath him.
“Say it again.”
“I’ll eat vegetables.”
“No V,” he laughed. “Tell me how I feel and look at me when you come.”
I threw my head back and looked him in the eye as I came undone. I screamed, hugged my body to his, and then fell back.
“Now you can suck me off,” he said as he pulled himself out of me. My head was swimming from post-orgasm glow but I was still in sex mode. I got on my knees and put him in my mouth, letting him push my head down to take him all in.
“You’re going to eat vegetables and like it,” he laughed as he pushed me down again.
I stopped momentarily and shook my head. “This is the weirdest power trip you’ve ever been on.”
“Keep going,” he demanded.
“Yes sir.”
I put him back in my mouth and went hard, licking him over and over until I took him all the way in. “Fuck,” he groaned. “I’m close.”
He came in my mouth and I sat back and smiled.
“I’m going to make dinner now,” he announced.
“I feel like I’ve had enough protein, bro.”
“I’ll make the tofu extra crispy.”
My fucking marriage, y’all.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/w1dwng/a_fight_about_vegetables_somehow_turned_into_me
Between the tofu and the McDonald’s, I’m not sure which one of you is more wrong about food.
Viola…. I love you but your culinary choices are actually barbaric lmao. So that’s why you avoided my worst meals you’ve ever served question during the ama LMAO
I’m curious what a pizza burrito is…. Do you just roll up the pizza and eat it or do you actually make a a filling for it lol
This is the strangest and funniest domme play I’ve ever heard.
>“You’re going to eat vegetables and like it,” he laughed as he pushed me down again.
>I stopped momentarily and shook my head. “This is the weirdest power trip you’ve ever been on.”
Beautiful
This is so much my marriage. In a good way. Lots of good ways.
I’m not even gonna lie i want your type of marriage this was hot af haha
This is like an adults version of “here comes the plane” and I love it!
It’s amazing how the dialogue is a kinda like a euphemism but it’s not simultaneously, you’re a wizard with words *bravo!*
Also I see what you did there, all throughout it was always you that’s going to get fed, it was basically a win-win situation for you! And you got fucked too! You. Are. Gud!
Now go eat your vegetables! Cheers to you and your husband Ms. V!
I loved this so much! 😂
> “Exactly! I have to boil water and then cook
> the pasta and then drain the water AND add
> cheese! Im not a trained chef!”
Really fucking funny
> “Yes sir.”
Really fucking hot.
I giggled and laughed so very much at this
This was both funny and hot. Nice work!
On god this has to be satire
I’m active and appreciate my body, but only really put work into it that I find directly rewarding—or that avoids something unpleasant, like a sugar crash, feeling dehydrated, or bonking during a hard activity. It’s a sort of unsophisticated approach. But beyond that, I say that if you feel ok and can perform well enough to run a marathon—calories is calories. If you fuck up, you’ll feel like shit and biology will compel you to try a little harder next time.