Chapter 1: First Encounters [MM]

I want to write my full story. And it’ll likely be quite long, despite the fact that it really only takes place over about 3 years, from 18 to 21 years old. I want to write it because I enjoy writing, but also because I don’t see much of this kind narrative in erotic writing on here. Most of the bisexual stuff I see around is usually completely focused on the physical action, and why shouldn’t it be? That’s why we’re here, isn’t it? A little smut to pass the time. But I want to see if I can convey how enormously confusing it was for me; an introverted, pretty maladjusted ‘adult’ who, due to what I now recognise as some mild neurodivergence plus the introduction of weed at an early age, didn’t know shit about social interactions. Plus had a warped dependence on sex and what I though was ‘love’ at the time. I was a broken mess at the start of this story, and I want to try and take you along with me as I discovered my sexual identity and went from introverted goth to borderline alcoholic horndog who would stick his dick in whoever was willing to receive it, to a mostly functioning, settled, loving partner.

If however you do just want to skip the sexy time, jump to OH FUCK WHAT AM I DOING?

As mentioned in my previous story, my first sexual experiences where at a far too early age with my best friend. We’d done pretty much everything by the time we parted ways, and I was mistaken in thinking I knew all there was to know about that kind of sex. Spoiler: I did not.

At the age of 18 I was alone. I mean, I was still living at home with my grandparents, but I’d lost my literal only friend. My life had revolved around him for as long as I could remember, I’d ostracized any potential friends before they could get close because as far as I was concerned, I had everything I needed. And also, any new friends might find out about my best friend and I, which was a deep, damaging SECRET that we had kept for a long time. As such, I was probably a bit depressed. However, a spilt bottle of nail varnish was about to change my entire life.

When 2000 rolled around, I was full-on goth. On this morning I was getting ready for college, putting on the armour and warpaint for another lonely day, when I spilt nail varnish all over myself. I think it was a deep purple.

As such I missed my normal train and had to catch the next one. Which is where fate had apparently decided I should be, because I met someone from school on there.

I didn’t have any friends at school, but I obviously knew people who I would chat to idly while I was there. One of those people was Tammy. She’d always been friendly with me despite my closed-offness. And lo, as I stepped onto the train and turned to find a seat, there she was, staring right at me. She immediately gestured me over, shuffling over to the next seat to make room for me. I took my earphones out and was assaulted by an abundance of cheeriness.

“I THOUGHT it was you! No-one else around here dresses like that! Oh my god, how are you? Are you going to work? What’s happening with you?”

I was a touch taken aback. Firstly because I’d not really had much interaction with anyone recently, secondly because she seemed genuinely pleased to see me. “Uh, no not work, second year of college. I work in the evenings at a cafe in town.” Any other person would likely have asked the same question of her to be polite, but my social interactions were as stunted as my ability to read social cues, which would become apparent quite soon.

“Oh wow! I’m just starting a new course, I did a year at 6th-form at school so I’m behind you on that!” She was genuinely bubbly, and I didn’t know how to deal with it. I didn’t know how to talk to her. I don’t think I looked directly at her the whole time, I found that too uncomfortable.

“So what’s happening with you? Where are you living? Are you seeing anyone?” The questioning felt relentless, and the last one stung. I answered on auto-pilot, not really being all that present in the conversation because I didn’t really know how to be.

After 15 minutes of ‘conversation’, she dropped a minor nuke on me. “I used to like you, you know.”

I was so taken aback by this sudden tonal shift that I just blinked at her for a second. “Um, sorry?”

“I used to, y’know, like you. I fancied you a bit, I mean. But I didn’t think you’d feel the same, so I didn’t ever say anything. You were always a bit… not there? Like you were always somewhere else.”

I was genuinely shocked. As in, my body was jolted by this revelation. I had to work to get my brain back in gear. “Oh, right. Um, I didn’t know? Sorry?” What the hell were you supposed to say in these situations? Did these situations ever come up for anyone else? What was the protocol here?

She laughed and it broke my shock a fair bit. “It’s fine, I wasn’t, like, madly in love with you or anything like that. And if I had said something to you it probably would have turned out you were gay anyways.”

Oh, hello shock, welcome back. “I’m sorry WHAT??”

My expression must have been a picture because she laughed again, louder this time, “I’ve not had much luck with men recently. Two of the guys who I asked out told me they were gay. I’m starting to wonder if I’m cursed.” She carried on laughing in a self-deprecating way.

I felt like the universe was crystallizing around me. This felt like a significant moment. This was an out, maybe?

I coughed and muttered, “Well, it’s funny you should say that…” I think I offered my first real smile of the whole interaction. Her reaction was instant and electric. “Are you FUCKING shitting me?! God dammit I AM cursed! The cute ones are always gay!”

I smiled again, a bit less certainly this time. I was in deep, uncharted waters with only this bubbly, enthusiastic girl keeping me afloat. I just had to go with the flow and see where I ended up. I was feeling a very potent mix of excitement and terror.

Tammy demanded my mobile number and wanted to meet up that evening. “Do you like karaoke? My group always goes to The Star on Friday nights, they’ve got a little bar behind the main pub especially for it. You should come along. Please? I’d love to catch up with you.”

I’d never been to a regular pub at this point, let alone a karaoke bar. But, feeling lonely and suddenly seeing a potential new lease on life in front of me, I agreed. We chatted a little more as the train reached my station, I said goodbye and promised to see her later, and stepped out into what all of a sudden felt like a very different world.

The day crawled past, I didn’t pay attention to what was going on in my classes. My mine was in turmoil. I’d definitely meet her tonight. I definitely would NOT meet her tonight. This was too much. I desperately wanted someone to talk to about this, but I didn’t have anyone. Maybe now I could have someone? The thought that kept recurring was that I’d come out. Just like that. I felt little jolts of terror. What if it got back to my ‘ex’? He’d be furious that I’d told anyone I was gay, because that would make people wonder about him, seeing as we spent so much time together. But I didn’t owe him anything, he’d ditched me, refused to see me anymore. But what if what if what if…

The evening rolled around, and I found myself stood across the road from the front door of a lively pub on a Friday night. To say I was nervous would be an understatement. I was so out of my depth the fish had lights in their heads. Watching people going in and out in couples and groups was intimidating. And they were all dressed so… well, not like me. I likely blended in with the shadows quite well, because I saw Tammy arrive, look at her phone and glance around the street. Then she put the phone to her ear. My own started vibrating. I contemplated not answering. She obviously couldn’t see me, I could just wait for her to leave and head on home. Yeah, that seemed like the sensible option, this was all too much for me.

I answered the phone. “Hi! Where are you? Are you inside already?”

Inside? By myself? The woman was mad. “No, I’m over here,” I said as I stepped forward into the illumination of the streetlights. She turned and spotted me, dissolving into giggles. “Ha! You’re taking the goth thing far too seriously! Lurking in the shadows like that, why didn’t you go inside?”

I looked past her at the building, full of light and music and laughter and people. So many people. “I’ve… never really been to a pub before. It’s all very…” I gestured vaguely. “It’s not my scene.”

Tammy’s expression changed a little, becoming a bit less aggressively cheerful and more concerned. “We can go somewhere else if you like? Sorry, this is just my normal go-to on a Friday, I didn’t consider that you’d not be into it.”

I back-pedalled immediately. “No no, it’s fine! I don’t want to stop you from going in. It’s just… a lot to process for me. I’ll be fine. Lead the way.”

She was reticent, but I assured it was fine. We entered The Star. I went immediately into sensory overload.

I’m sure I don’t have to explain to most of you what a busy pub/bar/whatever looks like on a Friday night. It was loud, raucous, overwhelming and wonderful. Cigarette smoke hung in the air like a blue fog. The smells, the sounds, the warmth. It was wonderful. It was too much. We had to push our way through the packed central floor area to reach a door at the back next to the bar. Tammy seemed to know everyone there. People were staring at me. I was an errant black dot on a kaleidoscope. This was 2000, the 90’s fashions weren’t even close to being dead yet. The colours, mother. The colours!

We reached the door, which led into a dingy concrete hallway with cracked flagstones. This was a relief after the sensory overload of a few seconds ago. The corridor had a few doors along it, then turned sharply left. I followed Tammy around the corner, and stopped at the doorway to a starry night. A loud, starry night. The long room was dark for the most part, with fairy lights strung all over the ceiling and walls. As my eyes adjusted I saw that the walls were actually painted black with glow-in-the-dark drawings on them, little cartoons and moons and all sorts. Along both walls were large picnic benches, the type with a table and attached seating benches on both sides. A walkway ran down the middle, to an inverted stage at the end of the room. Instead of the stage being elevated, it was actually down a few steps. Down there was a person butchering a song with such enthusiasm that it almost made up for their sheer lack of musical talent. Above their head was a large CRT screen with the words to the song working their way across it, and to the right of the singer was a DJ booth with a man looking like he was seriously regretting his life-choices up to this point. Another smaller CRT TV was on a stand facing the would-be pop star, with holders for 4 microphones attached to it. This was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. I forgot to be overwhelmed for a second. It was wonderful.

The tables were mostly full already. Tammy scanned the room for a second, then led me over to a table with a group of people sat around. They greeted her warmly, a few glancing over at me. She introduced me, told them to be nice to me, then had me sit down between two people who shuffled along to accommodate me. This was immediately too much again. I kept my eyes on the table initially, noticing that it was covered in carvings and writings. I also noticed a folder with KARAOKE in big, bold Comic Sans printed on it. Ah. Apparently I was in hell. That explained a few things.

I was aware that the people around me were still talking, shouting, bickering, bantering, just generally interacting around me. I was, of course, not aware that in a very short amount of time these people would become my best friends. One of them at that table would eventually become my wife. At the time though I became very self-conscious that I was just staring at the table and not acknowledging them, which was very rude. I was also very self conscious that I was dressed… well looking back on it now, I have to use the word ‘cringe’ here. Because while edgelord hadn’t been coined as a term yet, that’s definitely what I was at the time. I was basically just gradually folding in on myself in the hope that I might eventually just disappear in a cloud of black glitter. Then Tammy returned. With someone else. And again, I had no idea that this person would have a very big impact on my life. That very night, in fact.

She had the person sat next me move over to the other side, and plonked herself down where they had been sitting. She placed 2 bottles of Blue WKD on the table and pushed one in front of me. “Here you, first one’s on me,” she said with a smile that was nothing but pure warmth. I felt the tension inside me ease a little. I looked at the bottle in front of me. I’d never really drank before, and this stuff was very… blue. Tammy was knocking it back like it was water though, so I gave it a tentative sip. Yeah, OK. I could deal with this.

So some time passed. People got up and sang. Some of those people were from our table. I started to open up, ever so slightly, to the people around me. They would ask questions, I’d answer. Nothing invasive or too personal, just general stuff. The alcohol was working it’s magic on me, I was on my third bottle now. So this was getting drunk, eh? OK, I can see the allure.

Tammy leaned over and whispered in my ear, or as close to whispering as you get in a noisy bar. She nodded her head at the person she’d come back to the table with. “That’s Rick. He’s gay as well. I hope you don’t mind that I told him you were too.”

I should have been mortified, but alcohol dulls all edges. I did what was almost a mock shocked face, and gave Rick some side-eye. I think I thought I was being subtle. I likely was not.

When Rick had arrived at the table I was struck by his height (I’d find out later he was 6’4, towering over my meagre 5’11). He was reasonably wide in the shoulder, but clearly had a tiny bit of belly to him. Not exactly what we’d not call a ‘dad-bod’, but not too far off. Now I was ‘stealthily’ giving him the once-over, I took in his short, light-brown hair and his blue eyes. Clean-shaven with quite full lips that seemed to gently turn up at the corners. He was talking and laughing with the person next to him, a loud, clean, high laugh that was quite striking. As I watched him he caught me looking and nodded at me, giving me a big smile that lit up his eyes. I looked away sharply, and surely it was the alcohol that was making my face all hot, right?

Tammy nipped off to another table shortly after that, and I turned to watch the stage as someone tried to sing Robbie William’s ‘Angels’ and burst into tears halfway through. The crowd hollered and cheered for them for the rest of the song. I got caught up in the moment and added my voice to the din. My head felt swimmy. I fancied another drink.

I turned back to the table and Rick had taken the seat where Tammy had been sat. A bottle of Smirnoff Ice was in front of me. He nodded to it. “Noticed you were empty.”

This little comment had a strange effect on me. I locked up, considered it for a moment. He was right. I was empty. My life was empty. I had no friends. Wow. That was a profound statement. This guy got me. Just like that. Wow. Wow.

It’s possible he noticed my far-off expression, as he quickly added “Your drink, I mean. I noticed you didn’t have one.”

Oooooooooooh. Right. Yes. Of course. Silly me.

“Ah, yes. I was. Thank you.” Was I slurring a bit? Surely not. I offered a smile. I wasn’t really used to smiling much at the time. I hoped it didn’t come out as a rictus grin. He smiled back. A good sign! Wasn’t it? Wait, what am I doing?

Alcohol. The great inhibitor. Not only had I not ever really drunk before, but I am a massive lightweight. Even later, when I was drinking like a fish, I would get drunk very quickly, but I could STAY drunk for a very, very long time without passing out. Not much of a super power, but I’ll take it.

His voice was a little posh. A very tiny bit. Proper English and a little musical to my ears at the time. He leaned forward a bit and asked a question that I would tease him about for a very long time after. “So, what kind of music are you into?”

Dear reader, I’d like to paint you a picture of me, circa 2000 A.D. My hair was naturally very dark brown, to the point where most people mistook it for black. I had grown it out down past my shoulders at this point and it was currently tucked behind my ears. I was wearing eyeliner. I had avoided the outdoors during the day when I could help it to keep a pale complexion (which didn’t work anyway, as I have very slightly tanned skin naturally). I had a metal pentagram on a pleather strap around my neck. I had purple nail varnish. I had a spiked wristband on one arm and a metal bracelet on the other. I had taken off my long leather coat by this point, to show the Fear Factory t-shirt I had on underneath. I also had black Demin jeans and big boots, to complete the ensemble. To be asked what kind of music I was into was, quite frankly, fucking hilarious.

I had planned on just answering with “Heavy metal and stuff like that.” I really did. But Mr Alcohol was running the show, and my hitherto ignored humour muscles decided to take the wheel briefly. I looked him in the eye, and just said, in my most deadpan voice; “Steps.”

The table around me exploded with laughter. My head snapped around. I had no idea anyone else was listening to our interaction. But they were all laughing, not at me, but at my joke. I grinned, mostly out of nervousness, but with perhaps a touch of pride. This was a new experience for me. People thought I was funny. Huh.

The night progressed. More drinks were drunk. I was possibly a little squiffy. Tammy returned at some point, and we had a lengthy conversation about life after school and all that went with it. My sexuality was only briefly touched upon, but I was open enough at this point to flat-out say I didn’t want to talk about that at the moment. She didn’t push it. I even started talking to the others at the table. Rick was a constant presence throughout the evening. Nothing too full-on or pushy, he just kept up a steady stream of light conversation throughout the night. Suddenly, last orders were called, and I found myself outside in the cold with a bunch of friendly strangers. They were discussing going to the next big town over to keep the night going at a nightclub. Tammy was expressing interest in going with them, but kept glancing at me to see how I was reacting.

The cold night air had hit me like a brick of cotton wool. I was distinctly tipsy now and just grinning at not very much. Rick then appeared next to me. “If you don’t want to go with them, you’re welcome to come back to mine. I’ve got a few beers at home.”

Shock. That’s literally the only word I can use to describe my reaction to this. Adrenaline hit my system like a cold shower and several pints of coffee. I wasn’t so naïve that I didn’t know what the offer meant. Or.. did I? Was I reading too much into that? Maybe he just wanted to get to know me better and was being friendly? I was stunned for a good few seconds. I had no idea what to do. I was drunk for the first time, OUT with people for the first time (in more ways than one). This was such an insane departure from my whole life in general that I couldn’t process what was happening. Tammy, bless her heart, was once again there to save me from myself.

She pushed herself between me and Rick and jokingly said “Down boy,” to him. She took me to one side quickly and said “Don’t feel you have to, you know, do anything you don’t want to. One drink doesn’t mean you owe him anything.”

I hadn’t even considered that. I was too busy having an internal meltdown to worry about small details. Then she smiled and said “He’s nice, though. If you get what I mean. He won’t force you into anything if you go with him. I know him well enough to know that. You’d be safe.”

I thanked her, drunkenly and profusely, for bringing me out tonight. I was genuinely a little emotional. OK a lot emotional. If we hadn’t been out in the street I’d have likely broken down and told her everything about myself there and then. But as it was, I knew she wanted to be off. And I… apparently had somewhere else to go as well. I turned back to Rick, who was hovering and absolutely not trying to make out what we were talking about, and finally gave an “OK.” His response was unexpected, to say the least. “Yes! Game on!”

My confusion must have clearly shown on my face because he laughed and said “Sorry, it’s from *insert whatever TV program it was from, I can’t remember*.” Well, that cleared that up, I’m sure.

We headed over to his car, and I realised that he’d not actually been drinking that evening. I was immediately going into panic mode again. Get in this stranger’s car? Where to? How far were we going? Our town was semi-rural, fields and backroads were all over the place here. What if he was a serial killer? What if what if what if…

However. Tammy had vouched for him. And even though I technically didn’t know her all that well, the alcohol in my system was telling me that everything was A-OK. Also, let’s be real here; I had a very good idea of where this might be heading. I was 18, drunk and hadn’t had sex for about 2 months at this point, after essentially having it on-tap for a good few years. Mr Alcohol and Mr Libido met up, had a brief conversation and decided on my behalf that this was in fact a wonderful idea and that we should get in the fucking car, now.

The drive was very short, literally 5 minutes up the road. Barely any time to ask questions or even work up the nerve to form a sentence. When we stopped outside a terraced house I thought we were waiting for another car to pass us, but nope. Rick stopped the engine and got out. I took a deep breath and followed. I was trembling. I mentioned in my previous story that I tremble quite intensely when I’m very excited. At that moment I would have given a Hitachi Magic Wand a run for it’s money.

We were in an area that I knew, about 15 minutes across town from where I lived. This gave me a touch more confidence, seeing as I could make my own way home if needed.

It was a nice house. Rick explained that it was his mums. He’d been living away at university until recently, so didn’t yet have a place of his own. He was in fact in the process of looking to rent a place with Tammy and another friend in town. He was talking up a storm, going around the living room and turning on lights, the TV, making the sofa tidy. She was away herself at the moment, he explained, so had the house to himself for a while. He went into the kitchen and shouted through if I wanted a beer. I was still stood by the front door, feeling incredibly awkward. Should I sit? That felt presumptuous. What was I actually doing here? In a strange man’s house late at night? This was insane.

Rick returned, asking if I wanted a beer again. I couldn’t speak, so just nodded. He said I could sit if I wanted. I sat. The sofa looked like it was one of those all fabric fold-out bed things. I was perched on the edge of one of the seats. I must have looked ridiculous.

He came back with two cans of something and offered one to me. He flopped into the seat next to me and started asking about me. How old was I, did I have a job, how long had I been goth for etc etc. I began to reciprocate a bit more, asking how old he was (21) and what he’d studied at uni. The beer was fine, and was working to mellow me out a touch more, but I was still so on edge. And still trembling, which Rick noticed. He asked if I was alright, I admitted that I was really nervous. He looked concerned, and assured me that he didn’t ‘expect’ anything from me. My trembling didn’t subside, but I relaxed a little more, sitting further back in the seat.

We chatted and time passed. Eventually he blurted “I’d quite like to kiss you, is that OK?”

I was at the same time taken aback and oddly flattered. I also became instantly hard. I considered for a second and silently nodded. He leaned forward and kissed me, gently at first but with gradually more open mouth and tongue. I ascended to a higher plane at that point. This was my first kiss.

You see, despite that my ‘ex’ and I had done all manner of sexual activities for a long time, we’d never kissed. I tried to initiate once, but he freaked out and I never tried again. So this was my first ever kiss. It was amazing. His hand found its way to my side, the other to my thigh. I was so hard, more turned on than I’d ever been in my life. I didn’t know what to do with my hands. I just copied him, all the while getting lost in the sensations. My heart was racing and I was STILL trembling. After one particularly intense tremor he smiled and laughed a little. “Are you sure you’re OK? You’re making the sofa vibrate.”

I assured him again that I was fine, just excited and nervous. He looked me in the eye and said “Be honest, is this your first time?”

I looked away, not able to maintain the eye-contact. “Not… exactly,” I admitted. “It’s complicated. I’ve had sex before, but not… not like this.”

He seemed to understand, if only partially. He tucked my hair back behind my ear and said, gently; “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. It’s OK.” I was shaking my head, trying to convey that I was so, so up for doing everything with this sweet, gentle man, but lacked the words to do so. He took my chin and raised my face to his again, kissing me deeply this time. I melted.

After an eternity that didn’t last long enough he broke off and asked if I’d like to stay for the night. I didn’t hesitate this time when I nodded my firm agreement. This elicited another “Yes, game on!” from him as he stood up, a noticeable bulge in his trousers presenting itself for my attention. “I only have a single bed in my room, but this folds out to a double. Give me a hand.”

I stood, my own trousers bulging quite alarmingly. I tried to covertly readjust myself by turning around. I’d soaked through my boxers and jeans with precum. Well. That was embarrassing. I turned and helped him unfold the sofa into what essentially became a mattress on the floor, the back and arms of the sofa acting like a headboard. Rick disappeared upstairs to get some pillows and a duvet. It was during this lull that the thought struck me;

OH FUCK WHAT AM I DOING?

Rick was returning with pillows and the duvet. He laid them out of the sofa bed, switched off the lights so only the TV gave us any illumination, then laid himself out on the bed, looking up at me with a warm smile. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” he reaffirmed. “In fact if you change your mind I’m happy to drop you home at any time. It’s cool.”

I took a deep breath and removed my jacket, that somehow I’d kept on for the entire time. I sat on the bed next to him, and he sat up as well. Even sitting he seemed so much bigger than me. Confidence likely played a part. He put his arm around me and kissed me again, pulling me gently towards him. I let myself be enveloped by him, both arms around me now. I again matched his movements, putting my around him. He gradually slid us lower until we were lying down, still wrapped together, tongues now entwined. One arm drifted to my hip, then my butt. Gentle pressure suggested he wanted me to lie on my side facing him. I do so, and he did the same, lifting a leg to drape over mine. Thought had fled now, my body had taken over. He began to press his crotch to mine, slowly and rhythmically. I matched his pace, pushing back harder and harder. His hand drifted under my t-shirt, running down the bare skin of my back. I tentatively put my hand on his butt, silently urging him to grind against me harder, harder. He began to kiss along my neck, each one sending a little jolt through me. Our dry humping was growing more intense, and I was breathing heavily. He began to moan softly, mouth still on my neck. I could feel his firmness rubbing against mine, and honestly if I’d not been drunk I likely would have orgasmed from that sensation alone. This was most erotic moment of my life, and I was lost in it.

He began to lift my t-shirt, and I eventually realised he was trying to get me to take it off. I untangled myself from him and removed it, suddenly aware that I wasn’t exactly much to look at. I’m pretty stocky, so while there wasn’t much fat on me I also wasn’t exactly skinny. I was naturally smooth though, which was a blessing. Rick certainly didn’t seem to mind how I looked, and immediately resumed kissing my neck, gradually drifting down across my collarbone to the other side. I was slightly raised above him now and looked down at our entwined bodies, still mostly clothed, gyrating against each other. I ran a hand under his t-shirt and he wasted no time in taking it off. I was right in my earlier estimations that he had a tiny bit of belly on him, but he was by no means fat. He was also smooth, and I reveled in the feel of our skin touching as we resumed kissing passionately. My hands were now roaming everywhere, from the warmth of his waist to the feel of his hair. Our breath mingled as we breathed heavily into each other. Small sounds kept escaping me. In a swift movement he rolled on top of me, still grinding, the weight of him feeling amazing as he gently crushed me into the mattress. I spread my legs wider as he planted his knees and began to grind with more urgency. This was almost too much for me, the sensations were overwhelming. I was close to cumming, there was no question. My god that would be embarrassing. Should I say something, would it ruin the moment? Oh god, this was too much.

Luckily Rick was apparently as into it as I was, because he broke off the kiss and stopped humping, panting. “I need to stop or I’m going to cum. This is so fucking hot.” He gave a little ‘what the fuck?’ laugh and kissed me again quickly as he got to his feet. I missed his weight on me immediately. I looked at him quizzically. “Just need to get something else from upstairs,” he called back as he bounded up the stairs. I took this opportunity to undo my jeans and readjust myself again. God damn I’d made a mess down there. I went to do my jeans back up, then thought better of it. I mean, they’d likely be off soon anyway. Maybe.

Rick returned and a smallish cardboard box and placed it next to the bed. I raised my eyebrows at him, his only response was “Just in case we need it later.” OK then.

He returned to his place on top of me, resuming our heavy making out and grinding. Eventually he asked “So, what do you like to do in bed?”

I was stumped for a second. “I mean, anything, I guess?”

He laughed. “OK, but are you like a top or bottom?”

At this point I hadn’t heard these phrases before, so responded with, “Well I’m underneath you right now, so I guess you’re on top?”

He laughed again. Not cruelly, but with affection. “Top or bottom doesn’t necessarily mean ON top or bottom, but whether you prefer to give or receive. That is… are you into anal?”

I was, and generally didn’t mind if I was giving or receiving. I told him as such.

“Awesome. I don’t bottom much, myself.” And left it there, resuming our kissing and writhing together. He’d planted the seed of the idea though, and quite expertly. Not directly asking me if I wanted to ‘go all the way’ tonight, but letting me know it was on the table if I wanted it. And I WANTED it. So bad.

Emboldened by this, I began to slip my hands into his trousers, feeling his butt and running my nails along his skin. He took this as a signal and rolled off me, undoing his buttons and arching his back to get his jeans and boxers off. I began to do the same, was struck with a moment of self-awareness, slid under the duvet, THEN removed what was left of my clothing. A lay under the cover, acutely aware of my nakedness. Apparently Rick didn’t have as many hang-ups as me, and was laying naked before me. His cock was uncut, a first for me, and glistening with it’s own reasonable amount of precum. He looked over at me, huddled under the duvet like some sort of chaste 50’s housewife, and giggled a little. He lifted his edge of the cover and slid under, joining me with his warmth. We were on our sides again, his leg over mine, our bare cocks now pressed together, rubbing deliciously against each other. After more kissing and groping he stopped and looked down between us where were joined and let out a little “Wow.” I asked what was ‘wow’.

“You’re pretty big.”

I looked down as well. Was I? It didn’t seem to be much bigger than his. A touch longer, maybe. A bit girthier. I looked back up at him. “Really?”

He laughed a little. “Yeah. I’m glad I already said I wouldn’t be on the receiving end of that tonight.”

I was taken aback, but just resumed with the kissing and touching. His hands drifted south and started to jerk us both at the same time, our cocks pressed together, our mixed precum allowing them to slide against each other. I groaned quietly. Rick rolled backwards, pulling me on top of him. This was an odd sensation. With my ‘ex’ I’d been the larger person, so he was generally on top in our humping sessions. Now I was lying on top of a person larger than me, and it felt a little weird. I went with it though, letting my weight rest on him, kissing and grinding for all I was worth. It was nice, but I definitely preferred him on top of me.

After much humping and kissing and licking and groaning, he was back on top, and I felt wonderful. Eventually he raised himself up, kneeling between my legs. It was a beautiful sight, him towing above me, lit only by the blue glow of the TV behind him. He was playing with me, gently stroking up and down my shaft, down along my balls, swirling precum at the tip. He smiled a little smile. “I want to fuck you, is that OK?”

At this point I would have let this man do anything to me. I’d never had sex like this. This was warm, tender, emotional. Also slightly sticky. Everything I’d had before had been cold, furtive, impersonal. I wanted to feel him in me, no matter how uncomfortable it was. I nodded, shifting my hips in anticipation.

He reached over to the box he’d brought down earlier. He pulled out a condom and what looked like a squeezy bottle of hair gel. He put on the condom and squeezed the gel over into his hand, rubbing it along his cock. My face must have shown my confusion, because he laughed and said “What, you never seen lube before?”

In all honesty, no, I hadn’t. Sex with the ‘ex’ has been a case of using as much spit and persistence as necessary. It wasn’t the most intimate or comfortable of sexual encounters.

Rick looked at my face and his expression turned to disbelief. “You haven’t used lube before? Seriously?!”

I shook my head and felt embarrassed. I clearly had no idea what I was doing here. The passion I’d been feeling started to ebb away. Maybe this was a mistake.

He clearly noticed that I’d suddenly cooled off a bit, because he leaned down and took my face in his hands. “Hey, hey. It’s OK, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. I’m just surprised is all, seeing as you said you’d done this before. That can’t have been too comfortable for you.”

His tone, the look on his face. I was OK, I was OK, this was fine. I smiled and nodded. “Yeah, sorry, it’s just a lot all at once, you know? I’ve.. I’ve never had it like this before. It’s all new to me.”

He smiled and kissed me deeply, before rising back up, cock still as full attention, fully wrapped and ready to tap. “So,” he said with a gleam in his eye. “How do you want to do this?”

I defaulted. That’s the only explanation I have for what I did next. I didn’t say anything, just rolled over and stuck my arse in the air, like I’d done so many times before. It was just… what I’d always done. Rick’s response sounded a little disappointed, with an “Oh, OK.”

I felt him shuffle up behind me, heard the snap of the lube tube opening and closing again, then felt something cold rub up against my hole, swirling around before dipping in a little. I gave a tiny yelp of surprise, and heard a chuckle behind me. “Sorry if it’s a bit cold. It’ll warm up soon enough.”

He hadn’t pushed his finger in very far, but it already felt so different. There was practically no resistance. His finger was removed and I felt him moving up behind me, one hand on my hip, the other no doubt angling his cock towards me. I felt the tip press against me, and it just slid right in. No pain, no friction, just the feeling of fullness gradually expanding inside me. He was slow and gentle, asking if I was OK, to let him know if it hurt. I just gave a few high grunts, my face buried in a pillow. This felt amazing. He was wider than I was used to, but it just felt so good. He eventually bottomed out in me, his hips pressed tight against me.. He let out a moan and began to thrust slowly, pulling out and gently pushing back into me. This was incredible. It was so intense. I could feel every inch of him in me as his pace began to gradually quicken, his breathing becoming heavier. “Fuck, I’m not going to last long. You feel so good.” His voice sounded slightly shaky. His words had an effect on me, a pleasant tightening in my chest. But I didn’t make much noise, because I’d never been able to before. We’d always had to be quiet in the past. Old habits die hard.

His pace quickened and his breathing got a bit ragged. I could hear his hips slapping against my cheeks, and knew he was about to pop. With a final hard thrust and an extended deep groan he came into me, and I almost felt a sense of pride that I’d done that for him, that I was good enough to make him to sound like that, despite that I’d not really done anything.

I could feel him switching inside me as he thrust a few more times, his orgasm subsiding. He whispered “Holy fuck.” as he leaned forward and kiss my back, my shoulders. “That was amazing. I’ve never cum that hard before.” I’m sure he was saying that to be nice, but I still glowed inside at his words. He slowly withdrew from me, and I immediately felt empty. It had felt so GOOD with him inside me. Now I keenly felt his absence.

I rolled onto my back as he discarded his condom. He immediately returned to me, kissing me, telling me how wonderful it had been, how I’d been. I was on fire inside, the amount of emotions I was feeling were insane. He grabbed the lube and got a little on his hand, then laid back down on me, but kept to one side slightly, so could easily access my cock. He began rubbing the lube over my cock, the sensation incredible. He pressed his forehead to mine and kept speaking softly, saying how great I felt in his hand, how hard I was, all while jerking me off, giving me my first lube wank. It too was too much, I was coming within seconds, shooting ropes of cum up my stomach, up to my chest. Despite my usual quietness, I couldn’t help but groan at the immense release of this orgasm. I literally had never cum that hard. His hand didn’t stop as I came everywhere, and I immediately began squirming and twitching under him, letting out sharp little grunts as he gently tortured me. He relented, looking down at me. “God damn. That’s a lot of cum.” I looked as well. I was a mess. He kissed me quickly and went to get some tissues. I just lay staring at the ceiling, basking in the afterglow, wondering what happened next.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/uo2kcz/chapter_1_first_encounters_mm