[F] Christmas mass without underwear

I haven’t posted in awhile. I’ve been poorly and busy. I’m still as horny as ever though…

I’m French, and I was raised catholic. Not any catholic, mind you, the very traditional kind, the Fraternité sacerdotale Saint-Pie-X if you’re into this kind of thing. It is so catholic that the leader of the group was excommunicated by the pope for being too conservative. That means they celebrate the tridentine mass, so mass in latin, old style with the priest facing away from the faithful, singing, that kind of thing. I’m now in college in Paris, of course at the catholic university. I had to fight my parents a bit for this, because they wanted me to come back home. 

I posted some stories on reddit. I got lots of support, some nice conversations and a few dick pics. I have been gently nudged towards openness. So far, I’ve shaved my kitty, gone without a bra home and to class, fingered myself in class, went to mass without underwear, got on some birth control (patch since the pill didn’t agree with me…). 

Since the last time I have written, there was Christmas. As you can imagine, it’s a big deal in may family. I spent a week at my parent’s place with all my siblings. Which means I couldn’t touch myself much.  

We usually have Christmas dinner on the 24th, where we give the gifts, then go to night Christmas mass. I decided to repeat what I had done for mass before, for a whole day. That would mean spending the day with my family, including cooking and preparing the house. 

I woke up early, to be able to use the bathroom for more than five minutes. With my parents, my 10 siblings, two spouses, two kids, my aunt, husband, three kids, and I, you could say the house was a tad crowded and bathroom time was at a premium. 

I chose to wear a white blouse, dark green tights, red tartan pleated skirt with a nice silver safety pin and matching scarf, and a strawberry knitted cardigan. So far so catholic. Except I cut a hole in my tights to make sure nothing was covering my pussy. Underneath, no underwear. I made sure I was shaved and smooth everywhere. I wrote on my whole body with a lack marker. I wrote in French of course, but I’ll give a rough translation. 

On my breasts, I wrote “fuck handles” (poignées à baiser), “bite me” (mordez moi), “too small to fuck” (trop petits pour baiser), “needs to be swollen with milk” (gonflez-moi de lait). 

On my belly, I drew some little swimming sperm cells going up to a stylised womb with a grinning ovum. I wrote “breed me like a slut” (engrossez moi comme une salope), “hit me” (frappez moi), “I like big cocks” (j’aime les grosses bites). I also circled my birth control patch, and wrote “it’s a sin” (c’est un pêcher). 

On my tights, I drew arrows pointing up to my crotch, and wrote “cock garage” (garage à bites), “best bidder only” (au plus offrant), “sin’s source” (source du pêcher). 

Just above my slit, I wrote “deflower me” (depucellez moi). 

I also rubbed my slit to make myself hot and wet. I put some light tasteful makeup, but added some blush on my lower lips, making them nicely pink. 

I went about my day like this. After two hours, I started feeling disgusted with myself and thought about changing back. Of course there was no privacy in the house to dress up and clean myself, so I had to ride it. I became more and more ashamed, and then aroused. More and more aroused, and around 3PM, I could feel my slit becoming more and more wet, to the point I had to wipe it in the bathroom. I touched myself a bit, but couldn’t come. I got quite close. 

This continued during the day, and I was getting desperate, wet, horny. I could feel my nipples hardening, threatening to show through the cardigan. 

Mass was sweet, sweet torture. Standing, sitting, waiting. I could feel my slit leaking and my mind drifting. When the priest droned about God, I could only dream of sin. Of my aching nipples, my swollen leaking slit. 

I realized several things. First, I really don’t belong with these people. I don’t want to be married here, to be a servile baby oven. Second, I really really need to get a sex life. A real one. 

It wasn’t new year, yet on that Christmas night I made several resolutions. First one, I’m going to lose my virginity. I’m going to get fucked, for real, by a man. And I won’t be married when I do that, and I’m going to get fucked by other men after that. I’m going to be a slut. I want to be a slut. I am a slut, who happens to be a shy virgin. Second one, I’m going to stop giving myself orgasms. I’ll still touch myself, but no orgasms until I get my chimney sweeped. Third one, I need to go shopping. I need sex toys, nice underwear, nice cloth. I might need to get a little job for that… 

I felt a weight lifting off my chest as I decided that. 

Of course, since then, I’ve been chickening out, and have not met many people because of COVID. Now that the situation is getting better, I’m looking to moving on. I’m keeping the no orgasms rule. Which is good, because I’m now frustrated enough to be proactive about my first resolution… On the other hand, I’ve been shopping and I now own two sets of sexy lingerie. Go me! And I got a side job, I’m babysitting some kids through an agency, which is sweet. 

More to come then ! As an aside, I’m interested to hear about how I should go along with my first goal…  Tinder? Flatmate? Classified? Reddit? Party? Clubbing? 

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/sk97v7/f_christmas_mass_without_underwear