Longer post. Scroll to the xxxxx for the sexual parts.
Going on just over 10 years of marriage, over 15 years together, and 3 kids, my wife and I certainly got comfortable with each other and things in the bedroom got stale. First sex became once a week, then once a month, and it was always the same. I go down on her to get her warmed up, we fuck missionary, and then wrap it up. Bleh.
I was annoyed by it. We had talked about it and she agreed things had gone a bit stale, but that’s “what happens to married couples after this long.” Things changed for a bit, but then quickly settled back into the routine.
I wasn’t going to settle for that. I have fantasies, many of which I never expressed to her. Finally I told myself screw it, and speak up. So one night watching TV, I finally said to her I want you to control me when we have sex (start small, right?). After some what’s and where did this come from, I said it all. I told her every one of my fantasies that I could think of. Some she was intrigued by (controlling me, denying me, letting me lick her ass), others she flat out said no to (threesomes, peeing on me, heavy bondage). I think I just picked the right night to talk about it. She was in a good mood and very receptive.
I took it and ran with it. I bought us some toys she indicated interest in (larger dildo, vibrating rings, chastity for myself) without her knowing and gave them to her and told her for her use when she desired.
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In the last month or so…
She had me fuck her with the dildo instead of my dick. She came hard I was surprised. (Side note, I am not small, actually a bit above average around 7.5″. The dildo is 9″.) I did not get to cum that night, and I was fine with it. Giving her the new pleasure strangely sexually satisfied me without me cumming.
She’s been vocal during sex. I would have been lucky to get a moan before all this.
I licked her ass and fingered her pussy after a massage and she came hard.
She had me wear one of her thongs during a small Super Bowl gathering with friends this weekend (talk about exhilarating when nobody else knew)
She put me in a chastity for 3 days (not including night wear) and made me earn release by sexually pleasing her. We fucked after she let me free, suffice it to say I did not last long!
She had me eat my cum from her pussy.
She snowballed me with my cum after she gave me a BJ, and also fed me my cum after a handjob.
We have been having some form of sex 2-3 times a week.
She took the thong she had on all day and essentially gagged me with it while we fucked.
We took pictures and videos of us having sex (NO I am not sharing them!)
We created a shared note on our phones of fantasies and she’s been working through them. I’ve let her take control of all this because she seems to enjoy that more.
I am absolutely floored by all of this and am posting this mainly so other married couples in this situation realize there is hope. Above all communication has been the key for us. She’s not very vocal in general, so getting her to talk about this really changed things.
I don’t know if she already harbored these thoughts before I brought it up, or if I just struck the right chord with her. My guess is probably the latter because she’s not terribly sexually experienced beyond me and I would never suspect her doing some of these things before now.
I am hoping it continues and am open to suggestions for other ideas I could bounce off of her.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/lhbxrj/rekindling_married_sex_life_mf
Congrats man! I can honestly say that after 15 years and 3 kids with my wife, we are still going strong. I think our secret, as you said, is open communication. We also have done a lot of sexting and sexual chatting for years. Also, couples have to keep things fun so sometimes we flash each other when the kids aren’t close. I’ll touch her pussy maybe giving it a quick finger. I’ve pulled out my cock several times and she’ll give it a quick kiss and suck. Couples have to remember to never give up on intimacy. After all, that’s how the kids got here to begin with! Keep enjoying yourselves and never give up on sexual satisfaction. I don’t care what anyone says, sex is important!