[M]y [f]riend gave me a birthday lap dance as a joke which ended in us fucking

Before you head to college, everyone tells you that it’s going to be the best four years of your life. They tell you about the wild parties you’re going to go to, the life long friends you’re going to make, and all of the sex you’re 100% guaranteed to have. While all of these things are true in the long run everyone fails to mention one thing: how much it sucks being a freshman guy your first semester. Sure you make friends and have sex, but you’re not going to all the parties you dreamed about. Most nights consist of you and your friends drinking beer in your freshman dorm talking about where girls might be and which girls might want to fuck us. We were truly modern philosophers and our logic was sound. If a girl said hi to you in the hallway, she wanted to fuck you. If a girl asked you to buy Svedka for her, she wanted you to fuck her. If you locked eyes with a girl for 2 seconds in the dining hall accidentally and then you sheepishly looked away, she definitely wanted to fuck you.

Anyways, with it being hard to find parties eager to accept freshman guys with little to offer in terms of girls, alcohol, or drugs we were often left to throw our own dorm parties. About halfway through the first semester, my birthday was coming around. Taking the universe into my own hands, I decided to throw myself a birthday party/pregame in my dorm room. I texted all my friends the details and pleaded with them to bring any drugs and alcohol they could find. At the time, my core friend group consisted of four guys and four girls. Amongst the girls, was a girl who I’m just gonna call D.

D was, and still is, one of the funniest and craziest people I know. She would do nearly anything to get a reaction out of people, and seemed to love making other people seem uncomfortable. D looked incredibly out of place in our friend group but actually fit in super well. She was about 6’2, always wore tight outfits that alternated between Russian Hooker and Russian Socialite, and had the kind of ass that caused you to forget what you were talking about when you would see it out in public.

D was best-friends with my friend K. The two shared a sense of humor, but other than that they couldn’t have been more opposite . He was about 5’1 on a good day and a little incely at times. He was a virgin, and any mention of sex or display of PDA made him uncomfortable and antsy. When D and I found out this fact, we quickly put it to use. D and I would pretend to make out and grind against each other as she would give fake moans that would put pornstars to shame. Up to that point, we had never actually kissed or fucked, but there had definitely been some unintended erections that I prayed neither of them had noticed.

The night of my birthday came and the party was actually a lot of fun. We had to occasionally turn down the music on account of the RA making rounds, but the night flowed on as we played round after round of rage cage and drank warm natty lights. By the end of the night, only me, D, and K were left in the room. We were sitting around in a circle, D and K sitting in bean bag chairs, and me in one of those weird chairs at colleges which are supposed to stop you from killing yourself, just shooting the shit.

Eventually, D took a long sip of her lemonade and said “So why do girls get lap dances from guys on their birthdays but guys don’t”. K took a sip of his beer and responded grumpily “because if a girl asks for a lap dance it’s quirky and fun, but if a guy does it he’s a creep”. D laughed and responded “well if a guy ask me I would be honored”. “If that’s how you feel give me one then” I said, staring at D, the words leaving my mouth before the thought had even crossed my mind. “Can you guys not be gross for once” K pleaded. D looked at me and then at K. She flashed K a smile and said “well now I have to do it… give me a good song to do it to though”. I grabbed my phone and switched the music to “birthday sex”.

Immediately, she got on her hands and knees and playfully crawled over to to me. I imagine K was looking on in horror, but I was too busy looking down D’s shirt to notice. Once she was on her knees in front of me, she hoisted herself on-top of me. She began gyrating her hips, rubbing her big ass and her tight leather pants on my jeans as my face was pressed in-between her boobs. I began grinding, moving my body with hers. “Please stop right now” K pleaded, but neither of us listened. She stood up and spun around so she was now facing K before sitting down again. She continued grinding against me and grabbed my hands and placed them on her tits. I started squeezing gently. At this point, I was fully hard but I didn’t care that she could probably feel it. “What not enjoying the show” D said to K playfully who looked on in horror. As she continued to grind, she leaned back and loudly whispered into my ear “your cock feels so big”. “Fuck this I’m out” K said as he stood up and left the room, slamming the door on the way out.

Once K was out the door, I figured we were going to stop. The joke had gone on for long enough. But we continued to grind against each other. I could feel my cock straining against my jeans as she continued moving her ass against me. She turned around again and looked me in the eyes. I could tell she was going to say something but I didn’t care. I grabbed the back of her head and placed her lips on mine as she continued to grind into me. I picked her up from the chair (horny strength for the win) and we continued kissing. She grabbed her shirt and threw it across the room and I did the same. I put her down on the floor and before I knew it, she was on her knees unbuttoning my jeans. With a little assistance from me, she freed my cock from its constraints. She looked up at me “aww is it this hard because of me” she said before beginning to kiss the head of my cock. I wish I said something witty back, but I was in sensory overload and couldn’t respond. Her left hand moved to my balls and her right hand took my shaft as she began blowing me. She was sloppy and I was loving every second of it. Drool was dribbling down her face as she continued to suck my cock. She took my cock out of her mouth, slapped it against her face, and said “watch this”. She slowly took my entire cock in her mouth, emitting a choking sound but not letting that stop her. I fucked her throat for a few seconds before she removed her mouth from my cock. “Now it’s time for you to fuck me” she said standing back up.

I grabbed her hard and threw her over my desk nearby. I grabbed a condom from the bottom drawer and started putting it on my cock. “Don’t keep me waiting” D said playfully as she shook her ass. I slapped her ass and put my cock inside of her pussy, she moaned as it went deeper inside of her. “Start slowly” she told me to which I obliged. I started fucking her deep, slowly, and rhythmically. The way her big ass moved with every thrust inside of her was the most magical thing I had seen in my whole life. Soon I began speeding up, fucking her harder and faster with every thrust. “Fuck I’m going to cum soon” I told her as I got closer and closer. “Do it, let me feel you cum inside of me” she yelled back. I came instantly and hard. It felt like I had just shot everything inside of me into her and I could do nothing but laugh. I removed myself from her and she started laughing too. “Happy birthday” she said giving me a kiss on the cheek.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/ypzmx1/my_friend_gave_me_a_birthday_lap_dance_as_a_joke