My Experience In An Open Relationship [MF]

Wow! I can’t believe people actually read and enjoyed my story! I really enjoyed writing it and I was going to keep writing anyway, but now I feel even more motivated to do so!

For my second post, I want to give a bit of an explanation and context about me and who I am. So until July of this year, I was in a relationship. I’m not a huge fan of labels or tags, so it’s difficult for me to fully explain how our relationship worked. It was an open, polyamorous, creative and emotional roller coaster. It lasted for a few years and the main person who I shared this with was someone called Max.

I met Max as a friend of a friend a few years back. When we met I was going through a bit of an identity crisis. I’d dropped out of Uni, I wasn’t enjoying and I didn’t care about the subject I was studying. I had a lot of family problems and I worked a shitty supermarket job. I felt very directionless and I wasn’t sure what my purpose was, what I was supposed to get out of bed for in the mornings.

I’d often go clubbing, get drunk, try and escape my shitty life. I was still very very sexually active. I’d frequently have one night stands, with men, woman, trans, every creed and colour, sexuality etc. I thought that maybe I’d sleep with someone who could show me who I really was. However I think it just made even more confused. When I met Max I had no aspirations, no drive, no feelings.

The day we met was one of my friends birthdays, we went out drinking and clubbing and the second I met him I knew I liked him. He was tall, dark hair, thick beard. He had deep brown eyes and the kind of voice you would want to read you bedtime stories. He was confident, when we introduced he leaned in and hugged me, and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I was quite literally swept off my feet and he became my obsession. I seduced him into fucking me that evening. I went home with him and let him use me to his hearts desire.

I was infacctuated with him and he was addicted to my body. I met him again and again. Everytime it was a hook up and everytime we’d fuck like primal animals. The early sex we had was some of the most passionate, raw, rough sex I’ve ever had. I’d spend hours the next day feeling sore after the night before. I don’t know what it was, or why, but being with him made me feel like I had a use. No one else in that period gave me that same gratification.

For a few months we kept this up, I’d regularly go to see him and our relationship at that time was solely about sex. We were friends with benefits, I was still seeing other people and I know he was too. But whenever one of us needed something more, something deeper, we’d reach out. Then one day, something different happened, he asked to see me and when I got to his, he took me out for dinner.

We had a date, an unplanned, impromptu date. We went to some shitty little Italian place, but we sat down and talked. Up to this point, we’d barely connected on a human level. I knew his job, his interests, but that was about it. I’m not even sure he knew that much about me. So we chatted, and we chatted, and we chatted. Once we were done at the Italian place, we went back to his and… chatted. I can remember that night so vividly. I turned up at his expecting to fuck, nothing more, nothing less. However when it got to 3 in the morning and we were both fully clothed and talking, I had to pinch myself.

After that evening we both decided to make things more official between us. Communication actually became one of our strong points. We both loved spending time together, not just sexually anymore but also romantically. I think it was about 6 months that we were monogamous. One day, Max said he was inviting an old friend over. They were friends since primary school and had had many on and off flings their entire life, she was actually even the girl that he lost his virginity to.

Max knew I was more than open to the idea of threesomes. He knew I’d had them in the past and so had he. We’d discussed bringing someone into our sex lives and I think this was Max testing the waters, after all, I’d never actually met this friend of his. Her name was Rosie, and she became a part of our relationship. I loved her energy immediately, she was happy, energetic, motivational even. We explained our relationship to her and what we wanted to do and she was happy to be a part of that. She joined our crazy little relationship.

Before hand, me and max had agreed that before bringing anyone in, we’d agree to always be with each other when anything sexual was happening. There would be no sex outside of the relationship. The idea was each time we’d have sex with Rosie, we’d be together. This didn’t last very long. I would hook up with Rosie frequently whilst Max wasn’t there, and so would he when I was away. We were happy with that though, there was a level of trust and absolutely no feelings of jealousy.

Things then progressed to having sex with people other than Rosie. Max would bring girls home and fuck them in our bed whilst I was in the living room. I’d bring guys home and make them fuck me infront of Max. Rosie would also bring people home that would join us in a group. As a collective we all enjoyed the sexual freedom of being open to ideas and opportunities.

Then the world shut down. When COVID hit, that was a really hard time. In April of 2020, I moved back into my parents place. I want to stay anonymous, and leave my family out of my stories as much as possible, but there’s no way they could have got through the first few lockdowns had I not moved back home. Max and Rosie stayed together, I’d speak to them on the phone, on video calls regularly. I tried to stay in that relationship as much as possible. On video calls, I’d watch them have sex and masturbate along to it, in an attempt to feel included.

In the UK, things opened up then shut down again frequently. For the first year of COVID, I completely lost track of all time. I still loved Max and Rosie, but it was hard not being with them. Everytime I was allowed to see them I would, and it was great, but I could feel myself drifting away from them. In this time I did a lot of thinking, a lot self reflection. I’d grown a lot from who I was before I met Max, but I realised I had grown dependent on him. I couldn’t allow myself to rely on him to give me happiness, to give me purpose.

During lockdowns, I worked on myself, I started studying again. I decided what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be. I put a lot of time and energy into this and I’m in a very good place now because of it. Things with me, Max and Rosie were very on an off. Up until Januray of this year, when things went back to “normal” I found myself a mere passenger in our relationship. I wasn’t there, I was at home with my family and focusing on me.

For the seven months between January and July of this year. I stayed a part of that relationship because I was scared to be alone. The passion, the love, the excitement that was there before the pandemic had gone. I tried my hardest to relight the fire, to create a spark. But it was gone, in July I moved into a place of my own. I still speak to Max and Rosie occasionally, and I wish them well. I’ll always have love for them, but I’ve moved on from that now.

Since July, I’ve really enjoyed being independent for the first time in my life, I’ve got a job now that I love and I’m still studying to gain qualifications that will set me up for life. I’m still very sexually active, but I’m happy being single. Ive found writing to be a hobby that I love and hopefully now I’ve found a community that I can write for.

I know this isn’t a normal kind of story for here, but I’ve had so many messages and comments from people that want to know more about Lola. I wanted to get that all out, so that now I can get into the dirty stuff. Once again, please feel free to leave a message or send me a message. I love talking to you guys!

Lola x

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/xr2sft/my_experience_in_an_open_relationship_mf