(Background: We are in our mid 60’s and have been married to each other for over 40 years. Husband writing.)
Extreme frustration and disappointment is what washed over me. Most all at myself and my performance and a very small percentage, 3% maybe, at having a passive lover.
I don’t set out with expectations and hopes but inevitably they are there. I had a deep desire to make love to my wife. Since we had nothing better to do on a rainy day, I expressed this desire to her and we made our way up to bed.
No hopes. No expectations. However, … I make preparations. I get out the lubes: both kinds because she likes one kind for this and the other for that; this and that somewhat a moving target. I get out the wipes; there is always cleanup to be had. And, I get out her vibrator. She sees this and gives a thumbs up. I mention that we could try it since we had time to experiment. Inevitably, I have created in me anticipation and hope.
We climb in bed. My desire for her is now burning hot. I give her a warning that I am in a biting mood and before she is able to lay down, I have already latched my lips onto her breast. I pull her over me as I lay myself back onto the bed. She is on all fours, her breasts hanging heavily over my hungry mouth. I suckle as a starving infant would, switching from nipple to nipple. My hands, equally ravenous, are grasping, scratching, pulling at her flesh drawing her body into mine. She is right here, so close yet too far away from me. I need to feel her, to be in her, to have her in me. Our lips touch. I rein myself in. I force myself to be gentle. Tender. My mouth covers hers. I breathe her soul into mine then move my mouth to her shoulder and bite. Hard.
I can feel my loins stir with passion. I know this won’t last so, almost in the panic of a time-crunch, I apply coconut oil to her tender lips and press my semi against them. I am only half erect, barely there. I stuff myself into her. Yes, I ‘stuff’ myself in. Nevertheless, I am IN. I lay still for just a moment, feeling the intensity of the heat of her body enveloping mine. I am home. My mind quiets. My body sighs.
I am sorely aware that I am on borrowed time. I slowly begin to thrust. My member responds to her grip on me and to my movements and, for a few blissful moments, shows his excitement and firms up. She moans under me. I feel whole. I am holding the one I love and am expressing in this carnal act my love for her, to her.
Then, … he checks out. My mind immediately is preoccupied with my failing erection. I cannot do anything about it. Thrusting simply works me further and further out of her. I bite her shoulder hard, this time out of frustration. I stop. I had been holding my weight off of her but now I fail and collapse. I lay on her not moving, trying to regain control over my emotions. She lays beneath me, unmoving. (She likely can’t move). I roll off to her side bringing her with me and onto me. She raises herself in the saddle, reaches down between us and cradles my failed self between her bum-cheeks. She gently slides forward and aft, gliding her smooth groove over him. He is gone. AWOL. D.O.A.
She lays beside me, cuddled into my side. She is tender, loving. Her fingers lazily trace lines over my torso from my crotch to my lips. My hand slides up and down her back, more of a comforting gesture than one of foreplay. She has sensed my desire leave with my virility. We are both quiet. There is nothing to salvage. I am frustrated. I roll into a refuge deep within myself. I have failed once again. I am unable to provide pleasure to my wife. I am left with an ache in my soul.
She is unable to understand my deep need to please her with my body in this act. It is inevitable that she feels my disappointment. I am quiet. Distant. Sadly, she often turns this onto herself feeling that I am now upset AT her. My actions destroy all of my previous intentions: to make love to her. To have her writhe and moan beneath me in pleasure. To burry my soul in her. To leave my seed deep within each crevice of her body.
I am withdrawn. I am sad. This is me. I am sorry.
Your loving husband.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/vbhrtp/a_bittersweet_longing_for_a_passion_that_once_was
Get some cialis mate.