When my roommates developed a man crush [FM]

*I don’t give a fuck that this story is long. It’s hilarious.*

My last story reminded me of this period in my life and I thought this deserved to be told. I lived with three men one semester who put up with a lot from me. TBF, I put up with a lot from them.

When we first moved in my best friend came to see me. It just so happens that I was fucking my best friend at the time and the two of us got weird.

I had not mentioned our dynamic to my roommates.

He flew in late and I knew we were going to hook up but I just really enjoyed fucking with him. When we got to my place I told him I would make up the couch for him.

“Oh I’m sleeping on the couch, am I?”

“Yep. The good news is that it’s incredibly uncomfortable and small.”

“How about you get on your knees and beg me to sleep in your bed?”

He reached for me and I slapped him and told him not to touch me. He told me I was a whore who was about to do whatever he wanted or he would hurt me. I told him to fuck off before I screamed.

*Although we were well versed in role play, my roommates were not aware I fucked like this.*

He lifts me from the floor and slams me against the wall, shoving my face into it as he dares me to talk to him like that again.

“I won’t,” I breathe.

“You’re going to be good?”

See, at that moment three men come hurdling down the stairs, one of which has a baseball bat. They were quite confident in their abilities to be my white knight too until they saw the size of my best friend and got a little intimidated.

“Get away from her,” one yells. That’s when I die laughing and explain he’s my guest. I also explain the situation is consensual. They don’t believe me so I suggest we all have a glass of wine together. They’re hella skeptical and spend the first half hour grilling him. I even started getting mad because they’re being really rude.

Luckily, my best friend is pretty chill and very slowly starts winning them over.

When my best friend goes to the bathroom my roommate who happens to be gay looks over and says, “That is possibly the most attractive man I’ve ever seen.”

“Yeah,” I say. “He’s um… fun.”

“Do you two have sex?” My other roommate asks.

“That is no one’s business because I am an adult who does not owe any of you an explanation… That being said we do and I need y’all to not be freaked out if you hear anything.”

This leaves them all staring at me blankly. My roommates have many great talents, but they are not kinky. 2/3 are virgins and they’re all lawyer nerds.

“We get a little weird,” I continue waiting for them to catch my drift. They continue to stare blankly so I try again. “We have been known to say shit during intercourse that might sound odd, but it’s consensual.”

“What exactly have you been known to say?” One asks.

“She has a foot fetish and makes me wear a skirt,” my best friend says from the doorway. This results in me chasing him to my bedroom and jumping on him. He tells me I shouldn’t talk about our sex life like he’s a “common whore” and I tell him he can punish me.

He does.

He handcuffs me, bends me over, and spanks me when I orgasm too quickly because I’m “not supposed to be enjoying it” as our intercourse is “only for him.” He also comes on my face and makes me beg him to fuck me for a solid half hour.

Good times.

I get a text from my roommate who says, “I can’t tell if this is great sex or if you’re about to be murdered.”

I wake up the next morning and he is not in my bed. Instead he is hanging with my three roommates. I emerge to find him massaging on of their backs. I stare at them in horror.

“What’s happening here?” I ask.

“He has a bad back,” my best friend says.

“You don’t even give me massages.”

“You hate being touched. Do you want a massage?”

“No…” I was just inexplicably jealous he was giving a massage to someone else.

“Hey Viola,” one of my roommates says. “Did you know this guy is getting his PHD?”

“Yes, I knew that.”

“He’s writing his dissertation on [redacted].”

“Yes, I’m aware.”

“And he was in the army!”

“I’ve known this man for years. I’m aware of all of this.”

My other roommate comes out with champagne and Orange juice and announces we’re getting day drunk on mimosas. “Do want one, man?” he asks my best friend.

“Sure thing,” he answers.

“Are you SURE you want one?” I ask. He won’t fuck me if either one of us is drunk so this is not going in my favor.

“Let the man drink, Viola! Don’t be controlling.”

This is how I came to be sitting across the table from four drunken men, glaring at them all as they interrogate my best friend for more of his life stories.

*He is an interesting person and I’m glad they’re enamored, but I also need sex, damn it!*

What’s worse is my best friend knows I’m itching for it and is laughing at how grumpy I am. He takes his damn shirt off at one point because my roommates ask about his tattoos. Then all of my roommates take their shirts off for reasons I’m still working out.

Eventually I ask to talk to him and pull him into my room.

“You came to see ME,” I say.

“Are you mad I’m getting along with your roommates?”

“I’m mad you’re drunk and won’t fuck me.”

I lie back on my bed and announce I’m going to fuck myself and he can watch. At first he just leans against the wall and looks amused but when I really start playing with myself he gets flustered and finally drops to his knees.

“You could have been the one doing this,” I say as I arch my back and play with myself dramatically.

“To be fair, I also like watching you.”

I glare at him as I orgasm and then flip him off. He laughs and makes a comment about how I’m cranky when I don’t get fucked.

One of my roommates bang on my door and asks if we want to go to our friend’s rooftop pool. My best friend agrees without asking me and laughs when I get pissed.

“Don’t drink today or I’ll punish you,” he says.

“You’re drinking!”

“Don’t question me.”

The four of them continue to drink throughout the day and have a jolly time. Meanwhile, I sulk in the corner and have to explain over and over again that I am not pregnant. The drunker they get the funnier this seems as that joke is made at least 8 times.

Meanwhile, this fucking conversation happens.

Roommate 1: “What’s it like being as attractive as you?”

Viola: “What kind of a question is that? Don’t answer.”

Best friend: “Why wouldn’t I want to answer?”

Roommate 2: “Yeah V! Let him answer. Do women just never say no to you?”

Best friend: “Sometimes V does when she’s mad at me.”

*Everyone laughs but me.*

Roommate 3: “What’s Viola like in bed?”

Best friend: “Boring.”

*Everyone laughs again but me.*

Roommate 1: “What’s the weirdest thing a girl has let you do in bed?”

Best friend: “I can’t tell you guys that. I don’t want you to look at V differently.”

*I hate all of these men.*

I jump into the pool and my best friend joins me and grabs my ass under the water. He keeps doing it as he talks to my roommates who have no idea this is going on. At one point we make out and then he whispers we have to stop because he’s getting hard. My roommates overhear and think this is hilarious.

*I hate them all.*

Finally after a couple of hours I announce I’m leaving and get up. My best friend follows me out and corners me in the stairwell.

“You’re cranky, huh?” He asks.

“Fuck off.”

“Viola, why don’t you have a drink?” He sticks his cup in my face and I glare at him. Still, I take it and chug it just to spite him.

“This isn’t alcohol,” I say. It’s literally just sprite.

“Nope.”

“You’ve been faking it.”

He laughs and winks at me. I take his hand and drag him home. We walk 8 blocks without saying a word and I tell him to shut up when he laughs.

When we get back to my place I take his shirt off and push him against the wall. He’s thoroughly entertained as I rip his swimsuit off and throw it behind me.

“You’re never like this,” he laughs.

“Yeah well you’re hard right now so apparently you like it. Come on. You’re going to fuck me on the table.”

“The one you all eat off of? Won’t your roommates me pissed?”

“Yeah they can deal.”

I lead him to the end and he strips my dress off and then unties the top of my swimsuit before bending me over. He rips my bottoms off and then presses my head to the table as he thrusts into me.

“It’s been killing you all day hasn’t it?” He asks.

“Yes,” I groan and he presses my face harder against the wood. I come in like thirty seconds and let him keep going until he does as well.

I’m in a much better mood when we all have dinner later and don’t even mind that 90% of the jokes made are at my expense. When we get up to go to bed one of my roommates makes a joke about it.

“You see this table you’re all sitting on?” I ask. “We fucked on it earlier so enjoy that piece of information, assholes.”

I miss them.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/ucguf9/when_my_roommates_developed_a_man_crush_fm