The sides of the castle glistened in the setting sun as Humbert rode towards it on his trusty horse Flashdance. He could not wait to call to his love Rosita and hear her melodic voice course down upon him from the height of her tower. Rosita remained in her tower, Humbert mused, because she was an angel and thus had to keep close to heaven. Though her buttermilk skin, round supple breasts and taut buttocks made him feel devilish and think un-pure, hellish thoughts. It made his dick hard too.
As Flashdance catapulted Humbert into the castle courtyard, Rosita heard the sound of galloping hooves and rushed to her window. Her ample bosom heaved and bounced as she launched herself at the window ledge and gazed down at her beloved. The sight of Humbert already quite clearly erect was enough to make Rosita moan with preemptive pleasure.
Humbert called up to her. “Rosita my queen, I have come to feast upon your loins and splatter mine cum about your person! Allow me to bite your navel and lay my love eggs in your hair! My heart belongs to only you and it runneth over with mine love! What say you?”
Rosita let forth a banshee shriek of arousal and excitement. “Hurry my love! Ascend my tower and pluck the roses from my lady garden!”
Humbert hurried up the stairs taking them two at a time before he finally reached the oak wood door of Rosita’s chambers. The scent of fish heads and baby vomit hung in the air and he knew that she was using the perfumed snooch oil that he loved so much. His erect cock throbbed at the thought and he pushed open the door.
Rosita was lounging on her many quilted bed, her legs spread at 360 degree angles so that the sight and pungent smell of her vag hit him immediately like a tonne of vag scented bricks.
“Come to me and around me and in me and on me and with me and for me and with me lover boy” his temptress wheezed. His clothes suddenly disintegrated and his fresh cock hit the cool air and the strange particles of vag sweat in it as well.
He ran to Rosita and grasped her big milky titties with both hands and massaged them without restraint. Rosita writhed underneath him, her boobs almost coming off in his hands. He put her ear in his mouth and fingered her belly button. Rosita moaned with ecstasy and grabbed his cock in her hand and gnashed her teeth at the prospect of getting to chew on his foreskin later. But for now there was fucking and fuck they would.
They began fucking.
Humbert grunted like a mighty oxen as he plunged in and out of Rosita as if she were a swimming pool. Rosita’s pussy was wet and scaly like a fish he had caught recently and the thought of that fish turned him on even more. Rosita squirmed in pleasure as she was pounded like mochi in a barrel. A pressure began to build within her and she knew if he carried on she would go off like a fire hydrant. With a few thrusts, a jiggle of her jelly tits and thoughts of the fish, Humbert came in a crescendo of delight, his dick thrashing inside Rosita and milky cum spurting out everywhere.
With Humbert’s dick thrashing Rosita exploded with orgasm. Her hydrant prediction came true and she shot Humbert six feet across the room with the force of the torrent of lady juices that painted the back wall of her chambers.
They gasped and lay back together and licked each other’s eyeballs for a while before Humbert said “Now my love I must away, for there are things I must achieve and quests I must complete. Until the next time my angel, I shall carry your vag stench on my mind and heart wherever I go.”
“Oh Humbert”, Rosita retorted “I hate to see you go but I understand why we must be apart! Know that my heart holds a dick imprint of yours and yours alone and I shall keep my wank fluids for you upon your return.”
The offer of such selfless and horny act almost brought Humbert to tears but he didn’t cry because men don’t cry and he was a man. “Farewell my goddess” he called as he flipped backwards out of Rosita’s tower and directly onto Flashdance’s back below splitting the horse in twain. As Humbert dragged his horse halves out of the courtyard, Rosita screeched out the post coital bellow that could be heard throughout the land, telling the tale of Humbert and their salacious encounter.
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/t55fqb/the_ballad_of_humbert_and_rosita_humorous