For starters, my late teens and early 20s were not easy on me. I was dealing with improperly diagnosed mental health issues and drank myself stupid regularly. How I acted then is not an accurate reflection of who I am today. Quite frankly, I’m embarrassed by this. I enjoy fantasizing, but I couldn’t actually cheat like this again. This was a long time ago and I had to fill in some of the gaps with how I imagine things went. However, this story is entirely true and has alternated between haunting me and arousing me for nearly 15 years.
I was deployed to Germany when I was freshly 21, less than 6 months after I had gotten married to a man I barely knew. We had talked annulment as soon as I got back stateside and I hated him. I couldn’t wait to end our joke of a marriage. After a big fight over the phone, I decided to go out on the town. I settled on a small bar with only a few patrons.
“Cranberry vodka,” I said to the bartender. Again. And again. And again. He sat next to me. A gorgeous man who made my heart skip that I instantly imagined make bad decisions with. We made eye contact and I blushed. My legs relaxed as I placed my hands right at the bottom of my denim mini skirt. Flirting. Seducing. Inviting. I’m not really sure what my intentions were because I was already feeling the effects of my poor decisions.
“Cranberry vodka for the lady,” he said to the bartender with a thick accent that I couldn’t identify. I graciously accepted as my legs relaxed in his direction. We talked, often trying to find the right words to be able to communicate. His accent, I discovered, was Polish. Shamelessly, I flirted with him as the bar filled up. We talked for what may have been hours or minutes, casually touching each other’s legs and arms. To the outside, it looked innocent, but each of us felt the sparks rushing through our bodies.
I don’t even know how it happened. Was it the alcohol? The primal instincts and passion? Revenge and reparations for my whirlwind romance and failed marriage? Immaturity of a stupid girl who wasn’t ready for the real world? I don’t know, but before I could breathe we were in the men’s bathroom stall. My skirt was hiked up and my panties were at my ankles. I was on my knees choking on the cock of a man I didn’t know, and I liked it. I needed it.
I couldn’t tell you how long I was down there. Just like with our conversation at the bar, it could have been minutes or it could have been hours. It was just there. In the moment, time just didn’t matter. All that mattered was the fire in that bathroom stall fueled by our sweat and moans.
Lifting me to my feet, he threw me over the toilet. My hand pushed the lever as the sound of the toilet flushing momentarily snapped me back to reality long enough to feel myself throw my head back as he pushed himself inside me. With every thrust, my body ached in phenomenal ecstasy. There was no time. There was no one else as he held my hips and made me scream.
“Harder, harder, harder! Yes! Oh fuck yes, yes, yes, YESSSSSSSSSSS!”
I screamed as we came together, letting out smaller moans as my pussy continued to quiver and my legs shook. I regained enough composure to hear it. The cheers. The hooting and hollering of our adoring fans. I grabbed some toilet paper to wipe up the load oozing down my legs. I pulled my skirt back down as I looked for my panties. Determining them to be a lost cause, a sacrifice to the bathroom sex gods, I opened the door to my twisted emotions and new slut label.
The crowd descended on me like a waterfall. Touching, cheering, requests to go next. I looked back to see him getting high fives shoulder pats. I couldn’t decide if I was embarrassed or proud, but in retrospect it was actually shame.
“Cranberry vodka,” I whispered. “And can you please call me a taxi.” I slipped out of the bar, hoping to leave my identity as the bathroom whore behind in that single stall men’s bathroom in a bar I could never go to again.
But like a ghost, she haunts me. A reminder of the adventure that I miss when I feel like I’m suffocating under the weight of marriage and motherhood. The husband I cheated on? The one I was on the verge of divorcing? He’s still my husband. The sex has never been even close to as exciting as that night, and most of the time it feels more like the empty cab ride home than a sexually fulfilling marriage. I’m here though, and I’m doing my best. I always will because that’s all I have.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/rp5qu2/i_was_a_cheating_slut_who_fucked_a_man_in_a_bar
Most often, we have to trade ecstacy for stability. I enjoyed the highly arousing story, but I’m also glad to see you’re loving yourself.
Sexy story though sucks that it brings shame. I can sympathize though and I’m glad you’re in a healthier and better place mental health wise.
Sounds like you both might need to sit down and have a serious talk about needs not being met. Maybe he can let you explore and enjoy adventures outside of your marriage?
It takes a lot to expose yourself this way Cap. It’s definitely an arousing story but I can see how it causes shame as well. I’m so glad you’re a much better person now than you were then.
It sounds like you enjoyed it on some level, and just feel embarrassed by the slut shaming afterwards. So if you focus on how you felt during the build-up, and in the moment of it, did you enjoy it? The raw sexual energy? Would you recreate it if you could do it without the judgment?
I’m glad you’re in a better place now and maybe I just think this because my bf and I have both been through it with other people, but I think you owe it to your husband to tell him this story. And any other time you’ve cheated on him. Our pasts don’t define us but it’s not fair or healthy to keep this from him either.
Up to you of course though. Thanks for the story either way.
I’d it’s a sexless marriage. It you still love each other, is there any chance he’d be okay with you dating on the side? You’d definitely find guys interested in a no-feelings FWB situation, and if you’re after rough and dangerous, you could join your local kink community.
Another example of why I love you honest, real, and beautiful
This is the same story you posted about and deleted a few months ago right? Took a lot of bravery to re post it. Dw we know this isn’t who you are anymore ;)
You are a great writer!
It’s tough to not beat yourself up over past events – that’s just being human. The thing you can control is how you move forward. All experiences, good, bad and meh are learning opportunities. It’s what you do with them that matters.
And part of that is speaking openly and honestly about your wants and needs and desires. And that’s hard to really open up because it can be hard for a partner to hear. It’s rare that a partner can scratch every single itch you may have because… Well, we’re all diverse and kinky and have a wide range of desires. And that’s ok. A good example of this is when one partner may want contact or CNC play and their partner just can’t get comfortable with really committing to the acts (because half assed giggling CNC play just isn’t going to satisfy).
Part of being a good partner, and a GGG partner, is realizing that sometimes you have to embrace non conventional solutions and ways to have a relationship thrive. If letting you take a lover now and then improves the overall quality of your marriage, then it’s something that should at least be discussed openly and honestly. It takes two to communicate, though, and honestly, he’d need to open up about all of it – it’s on you as his partner to listen and hear and not judge.
The path forward is one you’d have to work towards together – whether it falls under the hotwife or open/ENM or even an agreed to DADT thing, the goal is the same – that your core relationship functions as well as possible. It’s a hard road but a necessary one to go down, because the alternative is agonizing. Good luck when you do begin the conversation, and know there are a lot of good wives/couples/husbands on the related subs who would be only too happy to help, offer advice and listen.
Thanks for sharing your story. You are not the only one that feels like they are stuck in a depressing marriage.
After checking your profile and pictures, am convinced you are currently an amazingly fun person.