Pawn stars sex: The rise and downfall of rick harrison is a sexy story about rick harrison getting penis enlargement pills, killing his wife, having sex with the first lady, starting a terrorist group, and nuking america.
**Chapter 1, The Beginnings**
Rick harrison says “Man i wish i had a big wiener.” His son corey says “Me too dad.” Rick harrison says “Well corey lets open up the pawn shop.” Corey says “Alright.” Then a cool looking guy with twirly looking moustache and tall top hat says “Hello i am Tim and i’d like to sell you an item.” Rick says “Whats the item.” Tim says “Wiener enlargment pills!! Theyre real.” Rick says “Holy Crap!! How much?” Tim says “2 grand.” Rick says “Deal.” Old Man Harrison says “Rick You absolute idiot. Thats a bad deal. Hes lying.” Rick says “With a big wiener, I could do anything.” Old Man Harrison says “No you couldnt.” Rick says “I will prove you wrong!!!” Rick does paperwork with tim to buy the pills. Rick consumes the pills. Old Man Harrison says “Wheres your big wiener now?” Rick says “Oh it didnt work. NOOOOO!!!” But it did work rick just needed patience. Next morning he has a foot long wiener!! Rick wakes up running to the pawn shop in a panic and takes one of the guns from the shop and goes home and kills his wife. Ricks wife says “What are you doing with the gun? Help! Help! Ahhh!” Rick says “Die!!!!” Rick shoots his wife 5 times. She is dead. Rick says “Now I can bang any girl i want now that youre dead. Mwahahaha.” He goes to washington dc to seduce jill biden first lady of the usa at the white house. Rick talks to himself “Hahaha Joe biden im gonna bang your wife because i hate your political opinions!!!”
**Chapter 2, The search for rick**
Meanwhile at the pawn shop, corey, old man harrison and chumlee are confused as to why Rick is missing. He has never missed a day of work ever. Corey says “Wheres rick.” Chumlee says “I dont know corey.” Old man harrison says “Hes never late, never!” Corey says “Lets go to his house.”
They go to ricks house. They see the dead body of ricks wife. Corey screams “Mom!!!! Nooo!! Who did this??” Old man harrison has the ultimate revelation. “Rick has killed his wife so he can bang any girl he wants. The wiener pills must have worked over night!” Chumlee says “Wiener pills?” Old man harrison explains the wiener pills to the guys. Corey is still upset about his mothers death. Corey yells “I am going to kill rick!!!”
**Chapter 3, Rick has sex**
Rick has sex with jill biden in the white house. Rick says “My wiener is very Long!!!” Jill biden says “Yes indeed.” Joe biden walks in on them and says “Ahhhh!!! What are you doing!!! This cant be real!!!” Rick says “Yes it is real. This is for raising taxes!!! I hate taxes!!!!!” Joe biden cries “Why my sweet jill, why would you cheat on me. Why, why why, I do not understand, i have always treated with you with respect and love.” Jill says “His wiener is a foot long.” Joe biden is surprised “Wow really? I didnt even know that was possible.” Joe shoots his wife to death then he leaves the white house. He proposes a bill to make a TORTURE legal!!! He will torture Rick harrison for banging his wife. Joe laughs “My plan is brilliant, mwahahahaha.”
**Chapter 4, The bill passes**
Joe biden gets his bill turned into a law. Torture is now legal. Joe biden spends the government funds on an extreme torture chamber. The pain from the chamber is Very Painful!!! So painful you’d wish you were never born, so painful you’d hate your parents for birthing you!! Joe biden is on tv and he says “Hello americans, torture is legal now.” Corey is watching the tv at home alone. He says “Awesome. Joe biden is my lord and savior. I will go meet up with him and ask him to torture my dad.” So he does. Corey says “Hi joe can you torture my dad. He killed my mom.” Joe biden says “Sure whos your dad.” Corey says “Rick harrison.” Joe biden says “Funny. That man is the reason i made this law.” Rick harrison is hiding behind a apple tree. He overhears the conversation. Rick says “Oh yeah? You wanna torture me? Thats it!! Im making a Terrorist group called the Terrorble Terrorists!!! You will all die. Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahaa.”
**Chapter 5, Terror rises**
In the siberian desert there is a terrorble terrorist group forming. There is so terrorble you cant even imagine the terrorble things they would do. The terrorble leader is Rick harrison who now calls himself “The Dark Overlord” The dark overlord found a bunch of guys to join his terrorist group. They are in a cave. The dark overlord says “Hello my friends. We all hate america, dont we?” The terrorists says “Yes.” Rick harrison says “Then lets Nuke em!!!!” The terrorists have kidnapped scientists who are forced to make an atomic nuke strong enough to nuke a whole state. If they dont comply, the scientists family gets their heads ripped off. And the scientist is forced to eat the heads. And then he is forced to poop it out wearing a diaper that is superglued to them so they cant take it off!! These terrorists are so terrorble. After many days, the nukes are ready. The dark overlord says something evil in latin. Mwahahahahhaha. They will launch them very soon.
**Chapter 6, Coreys evil bloody rampage**
Corey is so upset his mother died, he grabs a knife and says “I am going to kill every bald man because they remind me of my father who is also bald.” Corey kills so many bald men, not just the bald but even the balding. And even babies. Corey has descended into madness. Corey is so evil now. He is being hunted by the police.
The policeman chief gerald higgins is not enjoying coreys ideas of killing people especially babies. Gerald higgins says “Who would kill a baby? What a monster. I will kill this man or die trying!!!”
**Chapter 7, The message**
On tv, there is a video playing. “This is the dark overlord. You will all die in ten days. Were the terrorble terrorists. Mwahahahahahahahahhaha.” Chumlee says “I know that laugh!!” Chumlee goes to the pawn shop and talks to Old man harrison. Chumlee says “Old man!! I was watching tv and we are going to be nuked by rick harrison in ten days!!!” Old man harrison says “Stop doing drugs.” Chumlee says “You gotta believe me!!” After a while, the old man believes chumlee. Old man harrison says “I cannot believe it. My son is going to nuke our country in ten days!!”
**Chapter 8, Corey vs higgins the showdown**
Gerald higgins the police chief sees the message on tv. “Damn it, i only have ten days to kill this baby killer.” Gerald spends 3 days searching for clues as to who the baby killer is and where he is. Then he gives up. And watches pawn stars. Then he sees corey on tv. Gerald gasps “This is the man. The man who fits the description of the baby and bald person killer!!” He finds out coreys address and breaks the door open.
Corey says “Higgins, i have been expecting you.” Joe biden says “Me too.” Higgins says “Mr president, what a wonderful honor to meet you!” Joe biden says “Eat my rocket.” He grabs a rocket launcher and shoots Gerald higgins. But higgins is saved. A noble man grabs him quickly and throws him away from the rocket. This noble man is Old man harrison. Old man harrison says “Corey my grandson, you baby killing bastard. Why!?” Corey says “Rick is why!” Old man harrison says “You are no better than your father, the man who is killing us all in seven days!!!” Joe biden says “You mean rick is the terrorist who is going to kill us all?” Old man harrison says “Yes, we need to stop him.” Joe biden says “Obviously but we have no idea where these terrorists are located. We will all die in seven days because we cant find them” Old man harrison says “No we wont, we got higgins. The smartest detective ever.” Higgins gets up from the floor and says “Damn right i am. Hello richard, its been how long?” Old man harrison says “Its been 20 years, pal. Nice to see you.” Higgins says “You too. And anyways i will find the dark overlord.” Joe biden says “Great finally we are saved!” Higgins says “We? Its not you. Its me. And old man harrison. And not the baby killer either!” Higgins shoots joe biden and corey they are dead.
**Chapter 9, The battle of the desert**
Its one day until america gets nuked. Higgins finally cracked the clues and found out where rick and the terrorble terrorists are located. Higgins says “Yes!!” He calls old man harrison. They are going to fly to the siberian desert. Old man harrison says “We will never make it on time!! He will nuke america before we reach him!!” Higgins says “Believe in me, mr harrison, you gotta believe.” Old man harrison says “Alright, i believe in you.”
They reach the desert with 2 hours until america is nuked. Most americans have left the country. But the poor people are gonna die. They find the cave. The dark overlord says “What have we here?” Old man harrison says “It is me your father rick. Your actions have killed your son, they turned him into a Baby and bald person killer!!!! And now hes dead!!!” The dark overlord says “Rick is not my name anymore. I am the dark overlord.” Old man harrison says “Rick. You bastard!!” Old man harrison sheathes his sword and duels The dark overlord. The dark overlord gets his leg chopped off. “Ahhhh my leg, owwwie!!!” Old man harrison and gerald higgins kill the rest of the terrorble terrorists. He and higgins destroys the nukes, and frees the scientists.
**Chapter 10, the Aftermath**
Old man harrison is the new president, gerald is the new vice president. They have put rick in a torture chamber. His balls get stabbed a lot. Its very painful. Rick says “Oww!! Stop help it hurts!” Old man harrison says “You did this to yourself, son, you should’ve known better than to bang the first lady and start a terrorist group.” The end. The lesson of the story is not to bang the first lady and start a terrorist group and devise a plan to nuke america and wait a long time to nuke them.
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/r8f202/pawn_stars_sex_the_rise_and_downfall_of_rick