1. In 2002 – Was in college a went home with a very petite sister of a friend. We tried every position and exorbitant amounts of foreplay and lube, but could not fit it in. I am very average size, definitely big enough not to fit. Approx 5 ¾ x 5. We ended up just trying to get it done with oral. After she came in 69 she sits on my stomach and goes to town. GREAT BJ, using both hands very energetic. I cum in her mouth she sits up right on my stomach and forces out the loudest fart ever about a foot from her face. Super embarrassing, she never mentioned it, but on the ride home she said she wanted a raincheck on the sex. We had a couple opportunities after that, but she was not into it. I imagine it had something to do we me farting in her face.
2. In 2000 – College again and one of the college bars had dime draws every Wed night. 10 cents for the cheapest skunkiest beer you could find. I was in the dorm sleeping as I had baseball practice at 6am the next morning. My dorm mate had a gf and never once slept in our dorm so I basically had the place to myself. At about 2am my door opens (we never locked it) and it was a girl that she and I always had a mutual crush on each other, but the timing never worked. She would either be seeing someone when I was single or vice versa AND another one of her friends. The one I was crushing on was a legit 9. Long brunette hair, nice body, georgous face. Her friend was a solid 7/7.5. Tall (I’m short -5’8) curly hair, but pretty. They are both coming from dime draws. Neither said a word and they get into bed with me. They are alternating making out with me and are both rubbing on my chest and stomach. As I’m kissing the friend the 9 says “do you think he is ready for this?” As soon as she says that the door opens again and it’s my fucking dorm mate. He and his GF got into a fight and came back to sleep. He says don’t mind me I’ll go to sleep. Of course the girls leave. Nothing happens. I never got a chance to hook up with either one in the future. To this day (21 years later) I still wonder if I would have been ready for whatever they had planned.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/qcwhng/what_are_your_funny_embarrassing_or_missed
I feel like a good roomie would have about faced and let you do your thing