Act One
Some people call the 944 the “poor man’s Porsche.” Yes, it was relatively cheap for a car that can perform that well. And yes, it is not nearly as well known as the 911. I think that’s why I like it so much. Like a typical sailor, as soon as got my enlistment bonus, I went and blew it all on a car. A Canary Yellow 1987 Porsche 944. I love that car.
But, that left me broke, which is how I came to live in this flop house. A bunch of guys from the ship got together and rented a house. With the rent split 6 ways, it was very affordable, but it wasn’t the best living conditions. Someone comes home shitfaced every night, fucks up the kitchen. No one cleans. The place was also a revolving door of skanks.
Ryan, fucking asshole, was the worst. More than once someone has had to drag his latest conquest out of his bed before his real girlfriend arrived. On the occasions she would find some half naked hussy passed out on top of him, he would get mad at her for coming over so early. Fucking asshole.
I’m up early, washing my car in front of the house, trying to get out of there before all the morning after drama starts. Samantha, Ryan’s actual girlfriend, comes walking up the drive in a floral patterned sun dress, short enough to show off her amazing legs, but long enough to still leave plenty to the imagination. It’s low cut in the front, but not slutty. Samantha has small, perky tits, and I don’t think I have ever seen her with a bra on, and I make a point to look. She stands at the back of the car, watching me, looking at the car. A gentle breeze is teasing her dress, floating it up just enough to give me hope, and bathing me in the smell of her lotion. Coconut, I don’t even like coconuts, but goddamn she smells good.
“Morning Samantha.”
“I’ve told you, call me Sam, it’s fine.”
“Sure, Samantha.” I say her name in a playful way, it’s my thing, calling her Samantha, absolutely no one else does.
“You spend a lot of time on that car.”
“I love that car.”
“Is it, like, rare, or something, yours is the only one I’ve ever seen?”
“Samantha, since when do you care about cars?”
“Since right now, and I’ve been spotted from the window, I’m killing time so that he can….tidy up.”
Tidy up. His girlfriend is standing in the yard, giving him time to get rid of the evidence from the night before. Ryan, fucking asshole.
We walk to the house together, she has made the mistake of asking more than one question about the 944, and is hearing all about weight distribution and compression ratios.
Ryan, fucking asshole, meets us at the door.
“Hey babe, he boring with that stupid car?”
“It sounds pretty fast, I mean, I think that’s what you were saying.”
“Yeah, it’s a Porsche, it’s pretty fast.”
A while back, we had a liberty call in Spain, and some us were renting cars, to get away from the Naval base for a day. Ryan, fucking asshole, was in line in front of me, and I overheard him tell the clerk that he can’t drive a manual transmission. He does not know that I know that, and I have been waiting for the right time to give him shit about it.
“Here, take her for spin.” I unexpectedly, and a little too forcefully, throw my keys at Ryan’s chest. They hit him, he fumbles to catch them, fails, and they fall to the floor. I don’t even try to hide my smirk. Fucking asshole.
“Fuck that, I’m not driving that bright yellow piece of shit.”
“That sounds fun, babe, take me for ride.” Samantha begs him, placing some extra emphasis on ‘ride.’
“No babe, it’ll probably break down, and he’ll blame me for his car being shitty. Besides, since when do you care about cars?”
“Since right now!”
“Sam, it’s not like you’d know if you were in a good car or not, you don’t know shit about cars, just let it go babe.”
Ryan, fucking asshole.
Samantha watches two strumpets emerge from the back hallway, wearing their club clothes from the night before, smeared makeup, sex hair. I wonder if she’s trying to figure out which one her boyfriend fucked. I wonder if he even knows. Ryan, fucking asshole. She looks at him, shakes her head no, looks at me, and demands:
“You drive then.”
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/pk7pkr/i_love_that_car_mf