I hooked up with an OnlyFans girl who was pivoting to “alternative revenue streams” 😳 [MF]

There I was, sitting in the corner chair of the hotel room, as the woman I met less than an hour earlier stood between my knees.

I already had some hints that things might get a little unconventional in here; but not being one to turn down an adventure, I had decided to roll with whatever happened.

She slowly kneeled, never breaking eye contact. Her tongue traced her parted lips, and her hands came to rest on my knees. Ever so slightly she stretched out her fingertips, and her red nails began to slide up my thighs, nudging my legs apart. After the longest 10 seconds of my life, she finally reached my belt and unclasped it. With that, she took a deep breath, cleared her throat, and the expression on her face shifted to an almost professional demeanor. Then two of her fingers gripped my zipper, as she spoke in a warm, smoky radio voice:

“Two million employers have used ZipRecruiter for their hiring needs,” she practically moaned the words as she straddled my lap and leaned into my ear, her hand still working my fly.

“Find your next great hire or job opportunity with ZipRecruiter. Try it free for 2 weeks and enter code LEXISEXI at checkout for 10% off.”

By the time she stopped speaking I had no idea what the fuck was happening, but my zipper was completely down and her hand was expertly stroking my ad-induced pop up. I clutched the armrests of my chair and braced myself for what looked to be a wild night of highly commercialized copulation.

Ok, I hear ya, reader. This shit needs some context…

You see, back before [I learned that Target was a superior location to meet women](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/oyhtpf/i_canceled_my_apps_and_stopped_going_to_bars_now/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) than overpriced bars, I used to have a favorite little spot in uptown. A buddy had just bailed on me but I decided to go ahead with a drink by myself. Not two sips in, a VERY attractive woman took the seat at the bar next to me.

It’s not uncommon to run into a stunning woman here, but something about this one stood out. She was intimidatingly sexy, solo, and seemed a bit overdressed for the place. I could feel her looking at me before I heard her speak.

“Seat taken?”

“Nope. All yours!”

“I’m Alexis. How’s your night going?”

“Good! My buddy bailed on me but I still needed to get out for a bit.”

“Ha! I got bailed on too. Tell ya what. First round’s on me. Second round’s on you. Then we can see what comes next.”

Hmmm. Cryptic, unexpected, and slightly promising.

The conversation was surfacey, but I managed to pick up small details like she was some kind of model, had a few sponsors and was reasonably well-off financially.

Unfortunately the alcohol in conjunction with her hotness had me in a slight haze, so dot-connecting would not my specialty this evening, and I missed some clues. Plus she was quite the flirt and I grew equally as intoxicated from her casual touches on my arms and chest.

After a couple drinks, we were definitely vibing and I asked her, “You wanna get out of here?”

“I do. I really do, BUT….there’s one thing. I’m actually on the clock.”

“Oh you work here!?”

“Not HERE per se”

Huh?

“See, my day job is I’m a social media influencer, but I have other…um…revenue streams. I guess you could say I have a few fans, and some of them tip very well to meet in person,” she explained, waiting for me to fill in the blanks.

Oooohhh shit. Hol up. There it is. “Fucking idiot,” I yelled at myself in my head. “Of course that’s why the runway model in ‘fuck-me’ heels is randomly chatting you up!”

I composed myself.

“Wait…you mean like a…” I hushed my voice and looked around. Then whispered. “Like a prostitute?”

“NO!!” She quickly corrected me. “I mean…not technically. I’m sorta popular on OnlyFans. Like top 0.1%. But now it might go away soon, so…I’m trying to pivot.”

It took me a few seconds longer than it should have to respond.

“Oh…ok…wow.” I struggled to gather myself. “Sorry if I misread the situation. Please don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t pay for sex.”

She didn’t seem put off by my response. In fact, her face told me that this misunderstanding might even happen often. Then her gaze softened and a knowing smirk formed in the corner of her mouth.

“No worries. But ya know, I have a uh…how shall I say it…another monetization model. If you’re interested, then maybe we can find some mutual arrangement and you wouldn’t actually be paying for it.”

Her hand squeezed my thigh.

“I’m very certain you’ll enjoy yourself.”

Ummm.

I wasn’t exactly sure what to say and had no clue where this was headed.

“So…uh…what exactly is the difference between the paid version of leaving here with you versus the free version?” I asked, only half joking.

She snickered. “You’re cute. I like you.”

Her hand pushed higher up my thigh as she stood up and positioned her body between my knees. Her other hand traced up the side of my neck. Then her fingers teasingly ran through the back of my hair. She pulled her lips into my ear, sending shivers down my neck.

In the most seductive whisper, she said, “Advertisements,” and I felt her tongue graze my earlobe.

“You’ll still get to fuck my tight little body exactly the same, but in between my moans you might hear an occasional message from my sponsors,” she added.

Say whaaaaa—

Which brings us back to the hotel room, me slouched back in the chair, eyes closed, head back, and Alexis kneeling between my legs.

She had just finished a 15 minute striptease. And if you’re thinking that seems like a long time to remove 6 articles of clothing, you’d be correct. This tease, however was an erotically-veiled delivery of her lengthy terms and conditions, which featured Alexis shedding an article of clothing after each section of our contract.

There was something about “nonexclusive, nontransferrable, revocable, limited access to her Body and its Materials in accordance with these Terms”…blah blah blah. Honestly I didn’t pay attention. The seduction in her lips and the sway in her hips made me impatient. As the blood left my brain and entered my cock, her contractual foreplay had me scrolling for the “agree” button, which coincidentally was stitched into the front of her panties. By peeling them off, I accepted her terms, her cookies, her titties, and probably signed away half of my assets…just to be able to play with hers. But at this point I didn’t care.

“I uh— I’m not so sure I understand what’s happen—,”
I started to say but was immediately hushed with a gentle finger pressed to my lips.

She lowered her head, eyes locked on mine. Her tongue made 3 laps around the tip of my cock before she turned her head sideways and licked completely down to the base.

As my eyes started to close, she paused. There’s that devilish smirk again.

“Now, I want you to watch my tongue and think about how good it’s making you feel, baby. Then imagine if this tongue was too busy doing other things. Unnecessary things like…”

She revealed a single postage stamp on the tip of her finger and slowly licked it.

“…licking stamps.”

“Stamps.com. Print stamps and labels in seconds. Whether you’re a small office mailer or an online seller, like myself, it’s easy to set up and use.”

Her tongue finished another lap around my tip.

“No more trips to the post office for me, when I’d rather be here preparing your parcel,” she said as she engulfed me and then punctuated the last sentence with the sound of my dick popping out of her mouth.

“Try stamps.com and enter promo code LexiSexi for 10% off your first order”

Christ, what had I gotten myself into.

So, the night continued. And let me tell you, this woman was impressive. I mean I can barely remember my Netflix password, but here she was reciting line after line of ad copy while expertly working my cock. With her lips. With her hands. With her tits and with her pussy. And this was some seriously organic advertising. Like the Don Draper of dicks, she would masterfully weave a perfect line or two in between sucks and fucks.

There were countless times when she was fucking me so good that I almost forgot I was simultaneously being earfucked by corporate America. The filthiest threesome of my life. And somehow as our session went on, the ads became more targeted and personalized. Like a sexual Zuckerberg, she seemed to know everything about me. Eventually I started to get a little annoyed.

Then it occurred to me…
“There’s always a ‘skip’ button. Where’s her ‘skip’ button,” I asked myself.

After she stopped rambling about Capitol One rewards, I lifted her off my lap and started to carry her toward the bed. En route, she told me about Legal Zoom (which I briefly questioned as ominous foreshadowing), and as she came crashing into the bed, she reached between her legs, tasted her fingers and began a KFC ad.

Before she could utter the “phrase finger licking good,” I had my tongue on her clit and for the first time, she broke character and fumbled her lines.

Aha! Found the skip button.

I sunk my face into that sweet, ad-supported pussy and waited for the magic to happen.

She started, “All you need to create a beautiful website in minutes. Try Sqaurespa……ahhunnnnngh. Holy shhh….ohhh”
My tongue kept working.
“Try squarespace for—-fuuuuuck. Enter cock….uhh code. Enter code Lexi…Jesus fuck me please.”

Like a short-circuiting robot, for the next 15 minutes she delivered a nonsensical cacophony of fragmented advertisements and sexual expletives.

I was pounding as she was promoting. The harder I hit it, the faster the ass bounced, and the faster the ads were announced.
Short staccato bursts after each thrust brought a new product from those talented, flustered lips of hers.

“Oh my gahhh…Fuck. Hello Fresh delivered directly to you—-oh I’m so close so close ahhhj… Secret. Strong enough for a man, but oh Jesus so good for this woman. Fuck me daddy. Godaddy domains free with host—-hnnnng—Please. Harder please. 100% discreet packaging, billing and shipping from AdamEve.com. Oh god I’m cummmmmiiinmmggg… MasterCard. There are some things money can’t buy. And then there’s me,” she squealed with delight.

She and the adverts continued to come by the buckets, and I lost count of how many orgasms I gave her AND how many coupon codes she gave me

Her final orgasm was brought to us by Bang Energy Drinks. Did you know that 9 out of 10 Instagram girls agree? Bang is the preferred energy drink for you to awkwardly hold while standing on the beach in a bikini. Bang Energy Drinks.

Overall I’d say my first experience with ad-supported pussy was a positive one.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/pjmdce/i_hooked_up_with_an_onlyfans_girl_who_was