Cutie Cumpire Measures Up [MF]

[*Original Short: Cutie Cumpire Goes to the Movies*](https://www.reddit.com/r/DirtyWritingPrompts/comments/pa4y2o/wp_its_well_known_cum_is_an_alternative_for_blood/ha4jk39?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)

*Origin Story starts with* [*Cutie Cumpire and the Subreddit*](https://www.reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/pbqgbz/cutie_cumpire_and_the_subreddit_msolomfexhib/)

*Cum works just as well as blood for vampires like Nora, and Jasper sure makes a lot of it!*

***

Jasper carefully folded macaron batter by the oven in his—well, *theirs* now—little studio apartment while Nora sat on a bar stool by the island.

“You really do measure everything!” Nora said. She giggled as Jasper counted the number of strokes as he folded.

He quirked an eyebrow at her but didn’t dare lose his count—not until the batter was at the correct honey-like consistency and ready to be piped.

“I never would have thought the math degree would be relevant to baking, but here we are.” Jasper scooped the batter into the piping bag and double-checked the oven temperature. He’d gone so far as to calculate his oven’s heating curve and to tweak the bake temperature and time accordingly.

“So we are,” Nora said with a grin.

Jasper carefully piped the macaron shells, and once they were safely tucked to the back of the counter to rest, he started to clean up.

“If you like measuring things this much,” Nora said, “I’m surprised you haven’t measured your cum yet.”

Jasper’s cock twinged eagerly as if to say, *did someone say cum?* but he ignored it. “I’ve been tempted, but I know how you feel when I waste my cum.”

Nora blinked and tilted her head. “Wait, you’re being serious.”

Jasper’s cheeks heated. “Yeah.”

Nora laughed gently and looked at him like he was a puppy slowly rolling down the stairs. “Aw, babe. You should have said something! If you cum in a measuring cup, I’ll drink it.”

Jasper could not keep his cock from responding to that summons. He gulped. “Really?”

“Yeah, as long as it’s still hot, I don’t care.”

Jasper’s cock throbbed and pressed against his jeans. “I’m a Grade A idiot, aren’t I?”

“Yeah but you’re *my* idiot and you’re *cute*, so. You’ve already got the stuff out and you’re about to run the dishwasher, right? Let’s find out!”

And though it was true that Jasper’s brain became incredibly slow when it was blood deprived, Nora also moved unnaturally fast around the island. Perks of being a vampire, apparently. Within a moment, she was stroking his cock to full hardness.

His whole body quivered with pleasure. “Fuck, Nora, how does that feel so good every time…”

Nora giggled. “Isn’t it supposed to?”

“D-doesn’t seem like it should be allowed to feel *this* good…” Her hands were so soft and warm, and she knew all his most sensitive spots.

“Well, you have a point. I *am* demon-spawn. Satan knows what’s up.”

“Remind me to send them a thank-you note…”

“Filling this measuring cup with an obscene amount of cum seems like a good way to thank Satan. What do you think?” Somehow, Nora had also grabbed a clear glass measuring cup, which now sat on the counter next to them.

Jasper’s balls throbbed in agreement. “S-sounds good to me…”

He let himself sink into appreciating Nora—the strokes from her tongue, the gentle sucking at his tip, the warmth of her hands. And then, just as he was getting close to the edge, he had an idea. Because if there was one thing that Jasper was good at, it was torturing himself.

“If you want to get a really good sample, I should go get my butt plug.” Jasper blinked, and then Nora was no longer stroking him and was instead standing in front of him with said toy in one hand, a bottle of lube in the other, and a wicked smile across her lips.

Jasper nearly came just from the sight of it, even as his cock throbbed in the air.

Satan was definitely the right one to thank as Nora started on his ass with her tongue. Nothing turned his mind so utterly and completely to mush as that. He made no conscious decision to stroke himself, but his cock was in his hand and his moans filled the little kitchen. And then, after a generous application of lube, the thick plug filled his ass and the vibrations from the toy sent him trembling with pre-orgasmic sparks of heat.

Nora let him stroke himself but took charge, encouraging him with her own moans and gasps and then ordering him to stop as he reached the edge. Then she edged him a second time. And a third.

Pre-cum dripped into the measuring cup in time to his ass squeezing around the toy, and Nora cooed eagerly. “There’s already so much!”

Another thick surge answered. “Fuck, Nora, I’m gonna…”

“No,” Nora commanded.

Jasper gasped, groaned, and somehow stopped stroking long enough to recede from that point of no return. “H-how do you do that to me…”

Nora grinned. “You’re just naturally obedient.”

Jasper spurted pre-cum again.

“Stop,” Nora ordered.

He did. But the sparks of pleasure lingered, trailing around his ass and his base, through his aching prostate, riding on the vibrations from the toy. If he’d stopped even a half a second later, he would have cum even while he wasn’t stroking at all.

“Nora… this toy is…” He clenched around it, grimacing. “It’s gonna make me…” His hand started stroking again, despite his best efforts to stop. “Nora…”

Nora growled hungrily. “Make this fucking cup overflow.”

The heat ignited, gathering tight at his base. “Nora, I’m gonna…”

“Yes,” she hissed. “Cum for me!”

Jasper cried out as his two remaining brain cells struggled to direct the torrent of his orgasm into the measuring cup. Every spasm of his muscles around the toy was so intense, every spurt was so thick that he could feel it all the way down his length, his balls and ass and cock throbbing in time with each other and fulling the measuring cup with pump after pump, right to the brim.

It was only by Nora’s careful attention and balance that it didn’t spill all over the floor. She waited patiently for every last drop.

Finally, Jasper was finished. He turned off the toy, but left it in place for now. He didn’t dare look away from Nora, because she was staring up at him with those bright blue eyes and a wicked smile on her lips.

She unfolded her mouth, curled her tongue under the spout of the measuring cup, and then tipped it back and chugged his cum.

Jasper caught himself on the edge of the counter as he wobbled. His nerves had no idea what to do. He was so exhausted, so empty, so spent, but a sight like this deserved nothing less than bone-boiling arousal. Jasper memorized every detail. He would fantasize about this for many, many orgasms to come.

As Nora tipped back the glass and drank the last of it, Jasper’s body finally started to relax. But then her tongue arced out, and she licked the viscous remnants from the inside of the glass, like a cat licking out a bowl of cream. The glimpses of her tongue through the glass and the milky white of his cum sent his frayed nerves buzzing.

“I think I’m short-circuiting,” Jasper muttered.

Nora laughed, but she didn’t stop licking until the measuring cup was clean. She wiped off her mouth and then proudly deposited the cup in the dishwasher.

Jasper sunk another few inches. “I need to go lie down.”

Nora snickered, but wrapped an arm around him and helped him over to the couch. She returned to the kitchen to get him a glass of water and then snuggled in next to him.

Jasper drank almost the whole glass immediately. “I, uh… I knew I came a lot, but I didn’t realize it was *that* much.”

“How else did you think my ass was getting so round?”

“One, your ass has always been amazingly round. Two, you know I don’t understand vampire metaphysics.”

“I’m kinda surprised you didn’t cum again from watching me drink it.”

“Oh, my body tried to, believe you me. Fortunately, it doesn’t seem possible. If it were, I think I’d end up in some kind of infinite while loop—when Nora is drinking cum, cum more for Nora to drink. It would only end with you too full to drink any more or me dead, and my money’s on me dying first.”

Nora snorted a laugh. “We can’t have that. You should video me next time. I want to see what it does to you once you’ve recovered.”

“I will, and don’t worry, I took a very detailed mental recording too.”

Nora nestled her cheek against his shoulder. They rested there for a long few minutes, Jasper’s body doing its best to restore his internal fluid distribution to equilibrium.

Then Nora said quietly, “Just… for the record… If you’re ever sick or sore or just not feeling it… I can still go get cow’s blood. I don’t want you to get hurt. And if—well if you ever stopped cumming so much or even not at all—I’d still want to be with you. I mean it.”

Jasper looped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her tight against his chest. She fit so perfectly there. They fit each other so perfectly in so many ways. “I believe you,” he breathed. “Thank you for saying so. I am, for the record, very happy with our arrangement. I promise I’ll tell you if I need a break.”

Nora wrapped her arms around him. “Good. Yes. I love you.”

Jasper kissed the top of her head. “I love you too. Now how about we finish these macarons and then head to bed and see how many ways we can thank Satan for making us so lucky.”

Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/pbscla/cutie_cumpire_measures_up_mf