**Chapter 18: Hear No Evil**
**Penny**
Today’s the day.
Penny twirled again, looking at herself in the mirror. Donna had just left the room. The dress was perfect, tailored expertly to Penny’s body. It was shoulderless with lace sleeves, a classy but sexy combination. She pressed her hand against the corset under her dress. Donna said she didn’t need it, but Penny liked the tradition. She wore white lingerie underneath for Nadia tonight.
Tonight. Penny smiled at the thought of it. Tonight was the beginning of the rest of her life, almost like everything was going to be downhill after tonight.
Her hair was up in a tight bun with two dangling curls over her ears. She didn’t want to try something new. This style worked for her. What else did she need? Her eyes were lightly shadowed, but nothing too dark or smokey. She didn’t want to look like she was in a music video. She wanted to be radiant, resplendent. She wanted people to sigh with delight when she walked down the aisle, not pant with lust.
It was a strange ritual to go through. Nadia was hers, heart and soul. Everyone knew that. Did they need a ceremony to show that off? Would a few quick vows change anything? Probably not. It was just some strange cultural indoctrination, right?
What did it matter if Penny longed for a wedding, for a day where she felt like a princess, a queen, and all eyes were on her, on her love, basking in her grace and glory? Every girl had that thought, and, for over thirty years, Penny had been denied that. She had no one to tie herself to, no one worth declaring to all the world that she was Penny’s and Penny was hers.
Now she had Nadia, and everyone would see it. She invited everyone they work with. Nadia invited her parents, Jess, and a few girls from the clinic she worked at. They would all be there, seeing how wonderful Penny was, how happy Nadia made her. They’d all see this dress, this gorgeous dress, and wish one day to be like Penny.
Then happily ever after. Nadia would be hers tonight and every night as long as she lived. Right?
Right?
Penny took a deep breath. That’s what this was for. Nadia couldn’t be trusted. Sometimes she was Dolly. Sometimes she was Nadia. Penny couldn’t tell anymore. Her words were lies, or contained hidden lies, tiny judgements and doubts. Today she’d commit herself to Penny and there’d be no more doubt. Right?
Yes. Of course. That’s what the vows meant. That’s what she was working for. No more doubts. Vows and promises. Forever and ever. I do. All that sort of thing. This will make it real. They’ll be pronounced woman and wife, and everyone would cheer. They’d remember that day forever. As long as they remembered, it’d be real. It’d be eternal. It’d be –
Someone knocked on the door of the dressing room.
“Nadia?” she asked as she moved behind the dressing screen.
“Camille,” said the thick, husky voice.
Penny sighed with relief and went to open the door. Her “friend” was standing in the doorway in a regal green dress that matched her eyes. Her curly hair was down, reaching her waste, but Penny noticed the haircut she’d gotten. Her eyeshadow and eyeliner were a bit dark, even though it matched her dark lips. Camille had a hypersensitive flair for the dramatic.
“Penny,” she said. Her lips twitched in an almost smile. “You look radiant.”
Penny blushed and twirled. “I am radiant.”
“I hope not,” said Camille as she brushed past Penny and into the room. “Otherwise my skin would peel off.”
Penny closed the door and followed her into the room. “Do you need something?”
“I came to say congratulations.”
“There’ll be time for that later.”
Camille clicked her lips. “If you want me at a wedding, keep it at night. I almost thought you were trying to kill me.”
“No. Not at all.” Penny almost chewed her lip, but then realized what that would do to her lipstick. She licked them quickly and composed herself. “I forgot. That’s all.”
“It could have been a most dramatic mistake.” Camille sat in one of the chairs in the dressing room furthest from the window. “Imagine if I forgot as well.”
“Ah, yes,” said Penny. She went and closed the curtains, cutting off all natural light in the room. “My apologies.”
“It’s nothing. The only price you’ll pay is my absence. That isn’t too harsh, is it?”
“Not at all,” said Penny. “Not at all.”
“Good.”
Camille crossed her hands in her lap and sat with perfect posture. Her hooded eyes never left Penny as the blonde started to pace back and forth, trying to find something to do or say. Penny had invited Camille to the wedding, but it was more of a formality. They weren’t close; they were borderline rivals. But the community of powerful women in this town was small, and it helped to turn potential enemies into friends with the smallest courtesies. Besides, it wasn’t like she had invited Reyna. She wasn’t stupid.
“You’re nervous?” asked Camille, one eyebrow raised as she watched Penny pace.
“Of course I am.”
“Aren’t you happy?”
“Obviously.”
“She’s the one?”
“Absolutely.”
“Then relax. Everything will be wonderful. Maybe not perfect, but it will be a great day, one of the stars making the constellation of your life.”
“How can you know?” asked Penny.
Camille shrugged. “The benefits of long life.”
Penny chewed her lip, then cursed herself and went to look at the mirror. There was a slight imprint, and she got out her makeup kit to clean it up. When she finished, she looked back at Camille who was still smirking.
“They make us like teenage girls all over again, don’t they?”
Penny blushed. “Yes.”
Camille pointed her finger to her own lip, at the edge of the bottom. “You missed a spot.”
Penny cursed again, looked back to the mirror, and fixed it. She was a wreck. No matter how many times she told herself that everything was going to be alright, that this was going to be the best day of her life, the doubts crept back in. Round and round she went, her mind never settling on a happy ending. Not for a second.
“Have you ever been in love?” asked Penny. It was a personal question, a dangerously personal question, but Camille sighed at the question, her composed mask crumbling.
“Once. And only once. Trust me, Penny. In a dozen lifetimes, no one ever gets more than one.”
“You think?”
“I know.”
“What happened to her?” Penny turned to face her. “If you don’t mind me asking.”
Camille looked away. “I waited and lost her. That is something I’ll never stop regretting.”
“Oh.”
“When you have it, take it. Take it by the throat and pin it to the wall.” Camille turned back to Penny and smiled softly. “No matter what the cost.”
“Did you ever … um, did you ever use your abilities on her?”
“No.”
“Not once?”
“Had I done so, she’d be here now, sitting with me. But I was weak and lost her.”
“But if you did, how would you know? Would she be with you because she loved you or because you made her love you?”
Camille shrugged. “What’s the difference? A man buys a woman flowers. She swoons. Is it because she loves him or because he made her love her? Love is not like a hurricane, not something that sweeps you up and takes you away. It’s a house you build together, brick by brick. Don’t sell your love short just because you built a house for her to live in.”
“Oh.” Penny tried to follow. She wasn’t sure it sounded right. From everything she’d seen, from everything she’d been told. You fall in love. It *is* like a force of nature.
“But with us it’s different, right? I can build a house — to use your metaphor — and force her to live there.”
“Perhaps,” said Camille, “But then she’d be in your house. Trust me. It’s much worse to live in an empty house than to wonder why everyone is with you.”
“I just wish there were a way for me to know — to really know. Does she love me because of my power or because of me?”
“Are you your power?”
“I wasn’t always. Not before … “
“The cave.”
“Right.” Penny felt a shiver. This wasn’t the way she wanted to feel on her wedding day. She wanted all her friends to come in and tell her how beautiful she was, to eagerly talk about how beautiful Nadia was while teasing her because she couldn’t see Nadia. Not yet. There should be no doubt in her or the guests about whether or not this is a love story.
“Can I give it back?” she asks. Her voice sounds weak, but Camille doesn’t mock her for it.
“No.”
“So I’m trapped. Cursed?”
“Is that how you see it?”
Penny clenched her fists. “Yes.”
Camille shrugged. “We do the best with the demons we’ve been granted. Remember, she came to you before the cave. And kept coming. Don’t discount that.”
“That was fascination. She wanted to be tranced, and I couldn’t get her there. That isn’t the same.”
“It’s not?” Camille raised her eyebrows. “If you say so.” She rose to her feet. “You have something rare. If I had your lack of regrets, I’d go through with it immediately. I’ve been cursed with a life of mistakes. No amount of power undoes that.”
Camille walked up to Penny and kissed her lightly on the cheek. She stepped back, her arms on Penny’s shoulders. “The worst could be that you have her forever, exactly as you want. Even someone as powerful as I can’t have that. You’re lucky, even if you’re cursed.”
“Thank you,” said Penny.
Camille smiled and turned to leave. As she walked out of the room, she raised one hand. “Thank you for the invitation. I love any opportunity to dress up.”
She said nothing else as she closed the door. Penny looked at the mirror, making sure there was no lipstick on her cheek. Then she looked at herself. She looked beautiful, regal, powerful, and happy. Why didn’t she feel that?
***
Penny had decided that she would be the one walking down the aisle. Jess was to be Maid of Honor to both of them, holding both of their wedding rings. No one walked Penny down the aisle. She was giving herself away. No one else had the power to do so.
But most importantly, at the end of that aisle was Nadia. Jess tapped her on the shoulder and pointed to Penny as she approached. Nadia turned and beamed. The priest stood behind her, and the altar was surrounded by irises. Penny had a bouquet of them in her hand. She was happy to have something to hold onto to keep her hands from shaking. She felt the weight of hundreds of eyes turn to look at her as she walked. She kept telling herself that it was just like being on stage, that she’d done this thousands of times. The whole ceremony was like a script. It should all be coordinated, easy, and effortless. That’s what she told herself.
But that’s not what she felt. In the moment, in front of everyone, she felt the shame of her fraud. Nadia’s family was there, but she knew none of them wanted to be. None of them approved. They approved because Penny made it so. They were happy because Penny made it so. This whole church was full of Penny’s puppets, each of them dangling from the string of her words. Even the priest felt uncomfortable marrying two women in his church. He’d probably lose members of his congregation because Penny ordered him to.
Penny felt the weight of her charade pressing down on her chest like a boulder. It was like the proposal all over. Should she command them to smile more? Would it mean anything if they did? Why was Jess her maid of honor? Not only because she told her to be, but because she had no one else. The closest thing she had to a friend in the world was Harold, her butler, and she sent him away. After that was Camille, and she was absent.
She scanned the pews on both sides of her. She made sure to balance the sides out, but that meant both sides were filled with people Nadia invited. She looked to the faces of her colleagues and collaborators for all her little projects. It was a row of strangers playing nice. Why? Because they thought her a worthy investment because it was polite, because she was their employer. Was that any different from the commands she gave them? She thought about the house Camille talked about. Yes, she made them come, but that didn’t mean they didn’t want to. Right?
Penny shook her head slightly. Not enough to disrupt her hair, but enough to focus back into the moment. The music was playing. Everyone was holding their breath. Nadia was at the end of the aisle. This was it. This was it.
Nadia was heavenly. Her hair was up in a crown braid adorning her head. She wore no veil, though Penny did. Her white dress was strapless and sleeveless. Lace detailing sprawled up from the bust, climbing towards her neck, like creeping vines. It was more for effect than function, like decoration. Nadia had a pearl choker about her neck and pearl earrings. Everything about her was innocent, gentle, and pure. Her makeup was a nude look, and her smile made Penny feel like … like a queen. Like the queen she felt like she was always pretending to be. Here, in her eyes, was genuine pleasure at seeing Penny.
Did Penny force that too?
The music finished just as Penny reached the altar and turned to face Nadia. Just like rehearsal. Jess stepped forward and peeled back Penny’s veil. Nadia’s smile widened, though Penny didn’t think that was possible. The congregation sat, and the priest started speaking. Nadia didn’t turn to listen to him. Neither did Penny.
It was amazing how such a public moment could be so private. There was no one else in the world, in the universe. There was no god or death or heaven or hell. There was no demon or cave or institution or nurse. There was no past or future. There was only the eternal present, stretching before Penny in the form of Nadia.
Nadia gave her full attention to Penny. Penny blushed as Nadia’s eyes darted around, drinking in each detail of Penny’s body. Nadia missed nothing. She glanced at each earring in turn, at Penny’s sleeves, at her rings, at her dress, over her bust, raising an eyebrow when she noticed the cinched waist from the corset. Everything. Absolutely everything that Penny was and is. Nadia saw it, and she smiled. She saw that Penny was good.
The priest said something to Penny, and she blinked a few times, clueing back into the ceremony. “Sorry,” she said. “She distracted me for a second.”
The audience laughed. Penny blushed. It was good laughter. Nadia looked around, confused. She turned to Jess, but Jess gave her a sign not to worry about it. Nadia shrugged and went back to admiring Penny.
“The vows,” said the priest.
“Ah, yes. Proceed.”
The priest cleared his throat. “Will you, Penny Lane, have this woman to be your wife, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?”
“I will,” said Penny. She never meant anything more in her entire life.
Jess tapped on Nadia’s shoulder, breaking the spell of staring at Penny. Nadia blinked and turned her attention to the priest.
“And will you, Nadia MacQuarrie,” said the priest, “have this woman to be your wife, to live together in holy marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?”
Jess tapped Nadia’s shoulder again.
“I will,” said Nadia, but it came out wrong, like she was underwater or listening to music. It was too loud, and something was off.
Penny thought she heard a chuckle in the crowd. She turned to face them, but whoever it was stopped immediately. The priest continued talking, but Penny was scanning the crowd. Who was it? Another heckler? Another skeptic? On this day, her day, of all days?
Nadia tapped Penny’s hand. Penny turned back around and smiled at her love. Jess had both rings and handed one to each of them. Nadia went first, and Penny’s hand trembled when she touched her. When would it click? She wondered. When would it feel real, feel final? They’d said the vows, and yet that was another script. More rote memorization. The ring slid on her finger.
The ring she’d picked out.
No. She didn’t feel a flood of endorphins. She wasn’t suddenly entranced and transported to a magical place of feeling loved and seen. She was just a girl playing make believe, playing dress up with all her dolls because no one else wanted to play with her. What was that game when she was little? Pretty Pretty Princess. That was it. With the fake rings and necklaces and earrings and tiara. That was Penny now. She was seven and powerful enough to force everyone in this room to play along with her.
Except perhaps Nadia. When she went to slip the ring on Nadia’s finger, the redhead looked up and smiled at her again. Chills washed over Penny’s skin. Maybe it was make believe, maybe it was just a game, but there was one other person playing with her. That had to count for something, didn’t it?
Nadia came back. She had to remind herself of this whenever the doubts slashed at her. She ran away, but she never left entirely. She called Penny every night. Maybe it was entirely her free will to be here, but some part of her wanted this. There was something inside of her that wanted Penny and nothing else. Remember that. Remember that.
The priest gave them permission to kiss. Nadia looked caught off guard when Penny leaned forward for the kiss. She was too busy looking into Penny’s eyes and smiling. God, if only she knew what that smile did to Penny.
The crowd erupted into a roar of applause. Everyone was happy, so happy for them. Of course they were. But the bitterness in Penny slowly unwound itself from her heart. From the moment they kissed, for the rest of the day, Nadia kept her hand in Penny’s. Even throughout the pictures before the reception, she never let go.
Nadia was quiet most of the day. Not reserved. She smiled at everyone. She thanked them for coming — loudly to talk over the music — and kissed them on the cheek. She was great in pictures and never left Penny’s side. But she didn’t talk during the reception or their first dance. She kept herself focused on Penny. Or sometimes Jess. Nadia’s former best friend was attentive all day, anticipating their needs like a perfect Maid of Honor.
Penny didn’t think too much about it. She knew Nadia would wait until they were in private. That was typical for her: reserved in public and chatty in private. Tonight would be their wedding night, and while it wasn’t the wedding night young Penny had imagined, it would certainly be special.
Once they were alone in the limousine on the way to the hotel, Penny fell quiet. She didn’t think of herself as a quiet person, but nerves took over. The whole day she’d wondered when she would feel the click, when she’d finally know forever that she was loved and seen. When would she get that happily-ever-after feeling? It hadn’t come yet. If it didn’t happen soon, if it didn’t happen tonight, maybe it would never happen. Maybe Penny would never know with certainty that she was seen, loved, and wanted.
The Romeo and Juliet Suite at the Peabody Hotel was a sight to behold. Even Penny, who was used to luxury, felt giddy as she opened the door. A spiral staircase rose from the parlor with a fireplace roaring to the loft bedrooms. Nadia gasped when she saw it, and that was enough for Penny.
“Glad you like it,” said Penny.
Nadia said nothing. Penny turned to her, and she was gawking. “Come on,” said Penny with a smile, “I have plans for you.” The room shook slightly with her power.
Penny went to the bedroom, but Nadia didn’t follow. Penny turned around and waved a hand. Nadia caught her eye, smiled, and followed into the bedroom.
“Get undressed,” commanded Penny. “Your outfit is in the bathroom. Wait until I tell you I’m ready.”
Nadia looked confused.
“Get undressed,” commanded Penny again. The paintings on the wall rattled as the command wrapped around the redhead.
Nadia didn’t move. She shuffled her feet, bit her lip, and looked at the floor.
“What’s happening?” asked Penny.
Panic wrapped its fingers around her throat. Was something wrong? Did she lose her powers? Was this it? Was Nadia one second from walking out the door and leaving her forever?
“I can’t hear you,” said Nadia. She didn’t quite shout it, but it was louder than necessary. Something about it was off, abrasive.
“What?”
Nadia pointed to her ears. “I can’t hear you.”
“What do you mean?” Penny talked slowly and loudly.
“I can’t hear anymore,” said Nadia. “You or anything.”
“What?” Penny’s knees gave out and she sunk to the floor. Nadia scooped down to try and catch her. “What do you mean?”
“Look at me,” said Nadia. “I need you to look at me and talk slowly. I can’t read lips or sign, so this is going to be slow and awkward.”
Penny nodded, but her mind was somewhere else. This was it. She was going to lose Nadia. This was the end of everything. If her power was worthless, she was worthless. There was nothing keeping her here. Nadia came to Penny for the power. Why would she stay now?
“I’m still recovering from surgery. I had to put on a brave face tonight, but I’m tired and my ears hurt. A lot.”
“How?”
Nadia grabbed Penny’s face and turned it to look at her. “Try again.”
“How?” mouthed Penny.
“Jess helped me find a doctor. He was reluctant at first. There’s precedent for people blinding themselves or intentionally deafening themselves, but it’s ethically sketchy for a doctor.”
“Why?”
Nadia smiled. “It was the only way we could be together. You can’t help your power, and I want to be with you. But I want to be me, myself.”
Penny tried to talk, half forming words but not finishing them.
“Don’t you see?” asked Nadia. “You can keep your power and me. I can keep myself and you. It’s perfect.”
Penny ran her fingers over Nadia’s ears. “But your hearing.”
Nadia shrugged. “Small price to pay.”
“No.” Penny tried to stand, but Nadia held her in place.
“I need you to stay still and look at me, dear. It’s the only way.”
“But … why?”
Nadia kissed her. Penny tried to feel it, to melt into it, but her mind was everywhere. It was back in the cave, begging for more power. Back in the institution, begging to be let out. She was in The Rabbit Hole, like Alice herself, shrinking, becoming nothing while a giant Nadia loomed over her.
“Look at me,” said Nadia.
Penny obeyed.
“I want you. All of you. Just you. Not your power. Not your money. Not your hypnosis. You. I know you don’t understand that right now. And that’s fine.” Nadia’s smile widened. “I’ve got a lifetime to prove that to you. But as long as you have power over me, we don’t work. I can’t be myself, and you can’t trust or accept anything I do.”
Nadia touched her ears. A bit of sadness crept over her face. “This is the price I have to pay. Maybe I’m being reckless, but I don’t care.” She looked back into Penny’s eyes. Her face was intent, bold, and beautiful. “I know what I want. I want you. I want you to know that when I say I want you, it’s me doing it, not you. When I kiss you, it’s because I want to kiss you. I want you to see with your whole self, that my whole self is in this. Forever.”
“But … but …” Penny tried to form words. She was the little girl back in the institution, stuck at the whims of those in charge, those in power. No one came to get her. Her parents abandoned and abused her. Her nurse hurt and defiled her. Her doctors tormented and scarred her. Everyone that should have taken care of her made things worse.
Everyone but Nadia.
“I know it’s not ideal,” said Nadia. “We’ll have to watch movies with closed captions on, and I know you hate subtitles. I’ll probably be a shitty assistant on stage, unless we do a lot of more visual cues. Same at work. I’ll need lights when you want me, not beeps and rings. It’s going to be an adjustment, and I know that’s a pain in the ass. Maybe I should have talked to -”
Penny kissed Nadia with everything she was. All the brokenness, all the shame, all the pain, all the rage, all the darkness, and all the silly, naive hope. She grieved what Nadia had lost, and what she had gained. She grieved the gift, and yet, the pain in her broke from it. The invisible girl was seen.
She closed her eyes as she kissed Nadia. She saw herself, the poor little girl, locked in the institution. She imagined the nights curled up and cold, too afraid to ask the nurse to give her another blanket or turn up the heat. Not the nurse. Anyone but the nurse. But there was no one else. No one was coming. Then Nadia came. In her mind, she saw it perfectly, the memory reforged. Nadia crawled into the bed with her, wrapping her arms around her, cuddling with her, warming her.
And so it was again. When the nurse left and Penny was bruised and crying, Nadia would slip into her room and hold her. After the shock therapy, Nadia was there, holding her hand, cleaning her cuts. When they abused her and left her sore and crying, Nadia was there, kissing her cheeks, stroking her hair, telling her everything was going to be alright.
Nadia was in her attic, hiding from her parents.
Nadia was on stage with her, holding her hands while faceless hecklers mocked her from the stage.
Nadia was with her in The Rabbit Hole, the safest place Penny could construct, where no one could get her.
No one but Nadia.
She pulled away and looked into Nadia’s eyes. They were soft and green, almost a teal. “Thank you,” mouthed Penny.
Nadia reached out and wiped away the tears on Penny’s cheek. “It’s for both of us,” she said. “Both of us.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.” Penny smiled. It sounded right. That’s what was different about her voice. It had been too long since Penny heard it. It wasn’t Dolly. It wasn’t Penny’s edited version of Nadia. It was Nadia. Simple Nadia. Pure Nadia. It was all Nadia, and it was all for Penny.
“I have one more gift for you,” said Nadia.
Penny smiled wider. “More? How could you do more?’
Nadia held up a finger and went to the bathroom. She returned with a small box, fit for a necklace. Penny opened it. Inside was a leather choker with a metal heart connecting each side.
“What?” asked Penny. “Is this for -”
“It’s for me,” said Nadia. “I know it’s technically a choker, but I wanted something I could wear to work. I figured this would do.”
Penny looked up, making sure Nadia could read her lips. “Why?”
“I want you to know that I’m yours. You can’t make me Dolly with the sound of your voice, but I don’t want to lose that.” She put her hand on Penny’s. “Despite what you think, I love being Dolly. I don’t want to be her all the time. I don’t want Dolly to marry Penny. I want Nadia to marry you, but I don’t want to lose the part of myself that disappears and is completely under your control.”
“So this -”
“And I know you don’t want to lose that either,” added Nadia. She winked, and Penny blushed. She never did that. God, was this what she’d been missing out on the whole time? This was like a whole new start, a whole new romance with no script for anyone to follow.
Nadia sunk to her knees. “I want you to collar me, Mistress. You are my wife, first and foremost, my bride, but you’re also my Mistress. I want to wear this as a constant reminder to myself, to others, and to you. I’m under your control willingly. I give it up freely. It’s a gift for you, not something you’ve taken from me.”
Penny’s eyes flooded with fresh tears. It was too much. Too good. She didn’t deserve this. She didn’t … she didn’t know what to do with this kindness.
Penny bent down and slipped the choker around Nadia’s throat. She latched it and lifted Nadia’s chin, guiding her to her feet.
“Thank you,” she mouthed.
“I love you more than you know.”
Penny smiled and kissed her. She kissed her and kissed her and kissed her. She wondered if this was what teenage girls felt when they first fall in love, that impossible hunger to have more, that flattered insecurity at being seen and wanted. She ran her hands over Nadia’s body, and melted into her bride, her wife. Nadia ran her hands over Penny’s back, unzipping Penny’s dress. Penny responded in kind, hungrily taking off Nadia’s dress.
“For now,” said Nadia between kisses. “I want to make love to my wife.” The dresses peeled off bodies. “Let me celebrate being,” the dresses slipped down legs, “Mrs. Lane.”
“Yes, Mrs. Lane,” said Penny. She felt giddy to say it. Warm. Impossibly warm. But she didn’t stop kissing. It felt impossible to not want one more kiss, to see if each one was going to be as good as the last one.
But throughout the night, she was never disappointed. Each kiss got better.
Nadia stumbled back to the giant bed. Penny collapsed easily onto her. When their lips were chapped, they kissed their necks. They kissed their shoulders. They kissed every inch of exposed skin, until they needed more. Corsets came off in fits of laughter and gasps of relief that were followed by kisses. Everything was followed by more kisses.
Garters came off. Panties came off. Stockings came off. Heels came off. Penny was amazed at how much skin Nadia had. There were so many spots she hadn’t kissed, and yet she had a lifetime to learn them, to study them. She would know their habits and preferences. She would have a special kiss for each of them. A kiss for the crease of the elbow. A kiss for the upper thigh. A kiss for the back of the knee. A kiss for a big toe and a kiss for a little. A kiss for a chin. Three different kisses for the right ear, four for the right ear. When she ran out of ways to kiss, she made them up. The night was filled with sighs and moans, but more than anything, it was filled with laughter.
Penny had been served before. She’d ridden Dolly a dozen different ways. Nadia knew her body. And when Penny was hungry, she would seize what she wanted, what she needed from Nadia. But this was different. This was a whole new kind of sex. No one ruled the other, but everyone was served. No one took but everyone received. Everything was a gift, an offering. Nadia didn’t let Penny kiss her all night. Her fingertips explored, running over Penny’s skin, finding the parts she’d never touched, that Penny never opened to her before.
Now Penny was sprawled out. There was no hiding. Nadia could search her and know her. Nadia could taste and experience every inch of her. She didn’t tell Nadia where to go. She opened herself up and let Nadia explore. She could ask the questions Penny ran from, questions about scars or the long shadows cast over her heart. She could ask, and Penny would answer. More than that, Penny would invite her deeper. Penny would bring her into the pain, into the institution with her, and together they would find peace. They would make peace.
And Nadia was a new world Penny had never seen. It was richer than she could have imagined, with twists and turns she couldn’t have written herself. Nadia was fifteen times the woman Penny thought she was. She was funny and playful in bed. She was flirty and risky. She pressed when she was turned on, sometimes pressing down on Penny or grinding into her. The closer she got to orgasm, the more she purred and growled. There was a fierceness to her, a primalness, but Penny wasn’t afraid of it. She walked into the challenge and pressed back. Nadia tried to finger Penny quickly, but Penny held her wrists, guiding her to the pace she wanted. Then she let go and gave Nadia the choice to follow what she wanted or to pick back up to her feral speed.
But Nadia followed Penny’s lead. She went at Penny’s pace. She loved her. She saw her. She was patient with her.
And yet she pushed her. She surprised her. She excited her. She loved her, but she saw more. She explored her and explored with her.
They were finally partners, and that night, for the first time, they didn’t fuck. They made something new. It was fragile and scary. It was volatile and risky. But it was powerful and deep. It was necessary and transformative.
That night they didn’t fuck. They made love.
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Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/kxf4si/the_rabbit_hole_part_18_ff_mind_control_hypnosis