# SPECTRUM SEX
Welcome to SpectrumSex.com. I’m the owner/publisher of the site. My name is Quinienne Martens, and I am autistic. I have Asperger’s.
I made this site for people with autism and people who are in a relationship with an autistic person. I want it to be fun and educational. Mostly fun, of course!
When I first got a boyfriend, we talked about the usual stuff that people talk about. We liked a lot of the same video games and anime. We liked some of the same music. I only liked some of the foods that he likes. We enjoyed talking, and found things in common. He said I was “refreshing”, which I think meant that I was different from other girls he talked with. I say things differently, I act differently, and I think differently from people not on the spectrum. We had a lot of fun in those days.
One of the things that brought us to differences between us was sex. I was told about sex in general terms – maybe my mother didn’t believe I would get a boyfriend – but I was never taught about what to do or how to do it. I have all the hormones any other girl has, so I have these feelings and urges. I just didn’t have any way to express them. “I want” is not a complete sentence. Also, not getting what I wanted, although I didn’t understand what that was, made me grouchy and hard to get along with.
My boyfriend suggested porn to me as a reference. I searched for porn and found a few sites. The first few videos were pretty rough, I thought. Girls were pounded in every direction. Some of the titles of the videos were hard to take, so I stopped after watching just one of them. “Destroying” asses. “Ruining” holes. Fucking “skulls”. It was more like horror movie titles then sexy movie titles. I definitely didn’t want to be destroyed or ruined or fucked in my skull.
I told my boyfriend what I found, and he made some suggestions. I thought it was funny, but one suggestion was to look at “vintage” porn. “Vintage” to me means “antique”, so thinking of “antique” porn was hilarious. I did find some really old porn in the form of black and white photos of naked ladies in hats and pearls and stuff like that. They were weirdly beautiful. Later on, I will post about where those photos led my boyfriend and me. But for right now, I will explain the choices on this site and give you recommendations.
There are buttons for oral sex, vaginal sex, and anal sex. Some of the videos are vintage porn, some of them are videos of my boyfriend and me. I don’t want to discriminate, since some people have discriminated against me due to my disability. It isn’t fair. So there are buttons for gay and lesbian. If you push gay, you see buttons for oral sex and anal sex. If you push lesbian, you get buttons for oral sex, vaginal sex, and anal sex. Both selections will give you links to vintage porn and videos of friends we asked to help us on this site.
For people on the spectrum, I suggest you only look at a couple of videos at a time. It can get overwhelming to see a whole lot of different things at one time. My boyfriend and I went slowly through each video we found on our search for vintage porn. We didn’t view another one until I understood what we already watched. Sometimes that meant doing what we saw. I learn by doing, so watching the same video a few times, talking it over and doing it myself gave me the learning and confidence I needed.
For partners of people on the spectrum, you can view whatever you choose – but remember your partner can only take in so much before getting overwhelmed. Go slowly with your partner. It isn’t a race to see how many things you can try! Maybe you will need to stick with one thing for a while like my boyfriend and I did, until your partner is ready to go to something else.
There is a reading section for those who need words rather than pictures. Press the reading button to get to that section. You will find the same choices for reading that you have for videos. There is also a dictionary in both word form and picture form.
Mostly – this site is about enjoying sex. If you don’t like something, don’t do it. If your partner doesn’t like something, don’t do it. Sex is like pizza. I don’t like mushrooms, and my boyfriend doesn’t like olives – but we can find pizza to enjoy together!
Big thanks go out to my boyfriend, Pete Daggett. He helped me so much just in our relationship, and supported me in creating this site. He proofed everything I wrote and made sure it all fit right. We also practiced so much of what we found.
Thank you to all the following people: Jack Spencer and Bryan Knotts for their participation in videos, Dara Simms and Sage Adams for their participation in videos, my grandparents Leo and Verna Martens for the use of their garage and basement, “Sarge” Argent for his camera work, and Bruce Demm for his assistance as web designer.
The following sections are more advanced, so they are in construction status: toys, BDSM and role play. If you have suggestions, please contact us, and we will see where it takes us.
*Quinienne Martens*
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/kuj6y4/spectrum_sex_disability