I’ve really enjoyed lurking on this sub and it inspired me to post this story of a night I think about too often. It’s my first ever time attempting this so please let me know what you think. It’s written off of memory mostly, hope you enjoy.
It was almost a year that my ex (19F) and I (21M) had been separated and I had a very tough time moving on from her. She was easily the best fuck I’ve had, but we also had a lot of non sexual interests in common so the things I normally found comfort in detoured me into thinking about her, like certain songs or movies or even some memes. When we split up I lost a lot of friends, but I rationalized that they were mostly her friends (both M and F). All of this had me feeling isolated and into my first notable battle with depression. It felt like I needed to restart my life from scratch, so I did.
I started doing everything differently. I grew my hair out, I tried to become more assertive, I now had some tattoos and even started to dabble in hard drugs. These were all in opposition of who I was up to this point. I still really missed these friends and after some time I decided I wanted to reach out.
The conversation between one of my lost friends and I went really well. He told me the guys still ask if I was ever going to come back around and that they’d all welcome me back. I explained I couldn’t bear it, seeing how my ex and her cousin were always hanging there (her cousin was dating one of the other guys in the group), but then he enlightens me to the fact my ex stopped coming around several months ago. She had a new boyfriend and ditched them. With this in mind we made plans to hang out that weekend and just have some beers together like old times.
The weekend comes and I’m extremely nervous about it. I had the nerves like it was a blind date, but it was just my friends. I pull up to the house and everything looks normal but I have a pit in my stomach that something is wrong. Chalking it up to me being normally very anxious, I text my buddy about my arrival and he asked me to stay put for a minute and he’d come outside, which sounded odd. He jumps into my car and we’re both so excited to see each other we go right into “how ya been” talks. After a couple minutes of this he tells me that my ex is on her way over and starts apologizing for putting me in this situation. He said he hasn’t seen her show up to parties or hang out in 6 months or so and would’ve never guessed she randomly chose today to come hang.
As a side note, my ex and I shared a weird bond with each other. During our relationship, we always seemed to be able to just sense the type of mood the other was in. For example, I just so happened to reach out to her moments after she found out her grandma died. Another time I was pleasuring myself to a low quality, cell phone recorded video of our sex a few nights back and she happens to send me a nude, completely unprovoked saying “thinking of you ;)” Coincidences like this happened a lot with us and it continued even after our break up. There were days post breakup I’d really be missing her and I’d get a message from her “checking in” on me. Maybe I had it overblown in my head, but to me, it always seemed like we could read the other’s thoughts or moods despite whatever else was happening in our lives. It’s very easy to make the assumption that someone from the group let her know I was going to be around, but to me, it just felt like she knew instinctively. Anyway.
Still sitting in the driveway with my friend, he put the ball in my court and said I could do whatever made me comfortable and they’d all understand. At first I was just going to cut my losses and leave but there was a part of me that wanted to flex “new me” so I stayed.
Everything was going really well until she showed up. I felt myself becoming unglued by anger and sadness and decided maybe it was best to ignore her completely. She didn’t have a license at the time so I assumed her new boyfriend would be with her, but for some reason he wasn’t. Ignoring her was going well until we started playing a drinking game as a group. My ex sat about 3 chairs diagonally to my left and while peering at my cards in hand, I could see her checking me out. My anger started to turn to lust for her again.
Flashing back a year, to just after our breakup, I gave up on having standards or expectations on women. I just wanted to fuck any girl that gave me the time of day, but not a single one of them could work me anywhere close to the way my ex did. I hated this more than anything and missed it most of all.
As we furthered into our drunkenness I gave up on being discreet as I also started to check her out too. I’d let my eyes be caught by hers and after a momentary awkward stare, we’d both smile and look back to our cards. We finally had struck a nice conversation with each other from across the table. Our friends were talking to each other at the same time so I didn’t know who was listening to my ex and I and who wasn’t. When she started reminiscing with me about fun times we once shared the intense flutter of nerves returned to my heart, I could feel there was a piece of me she still liked. I would pull up photos on my phone from the days she’d talk about and walked over to her to show them to her and she’d do the same, leaning over my shoulder, talking nervously into my ear, touching my arm or hand as she wanted my attention. I could feel her heart pumping as fast as mine from a foot away and for once I actually noticed signs of attraction.
My ex and I found ourselves talking alone in the kitchen when my feelings for her overtook me. At the first lull in conversation between us I dropped my tone in my voice and very intently told her how much I wanted to kiss her again. She started to look very upset and nervous and I thought I may have pushed it along too fast. The silence from her lasted uncomfortably long but she finally spoke and just said “please don’t make it obvious.” As she turned to leave the kitchen she motioned for me to follow her with a silent wave of her hand. The jitters returned in full force and I could feel my knees wobble as I walked, trying to stay 10 feet behind her while focusing on moving casually and not staring at her every move. I saw her go upstairs and while the attention of the group stayed elsewhere I walked up to the second floor too. After looking in both bedrooms she opens the bathroom door and motions for me to come in.
The door had barely latched shut before we were so intensly kissing. I felt like a war hero returning home the way she jumped into my arms and pinned her feet around my waist, locking her feet around me and grabbing my face. It was the same perfect rhythm we still had with each other with no awkwardness at all. As our tongues wrestled in each others mouths she hops down from me and says “we have to be quick” as she peels her clothes back to reveal what I’ve been missing.
Despite her asking for brevity, I still took the time to drop to my knees to taste her again. She was bare shaven and could taste her nectar and she shivered as my tongue ran along. Her ass was still just as toned and tight and I playfully bit it as I returned to my feet with my pants and underwear down to my ankles, exposing my fully erect self. The black leggings she wore were bunched at her thighs and she turned her ass towards me and leaned onto the sink grabbing it by the sides of the bowl for support. I pushed her shirt up a bit and grabbed her tiny waste as she grabbed me to guide me inside her. Her pussy still felt molded just for me, coated with her sweetness but I could feel a bit of pressure pushing on my cock from all sides like it no longer has room for me. As I pushed my way down to my base, her head snapped up from looking down, her sexual energy hit me fully when she stared into my eyes from the mirror. Her mouth wide open, but silently holding back all sounds I’m sure she wanted to make. I almost came right then, but I was adamant to not have it end so quickly.
I pulled out to change positions and regain composure but first she dropped to her knees, eager to return the favor from earlier and engulfed my dick with her mouth. Attempting dirty talk, I asked her if she liked her own taste and with a slutty sexy grin she nodded with her mouth full of me. Her pale green eyes shot through me with lustful desire. She was the only one I’d met who could make me cum from just a look. She bobbed her head up and down with meaning like she wanted me to release it right there, in her mouth…but still, I couldn’t let this be over.
As I fought back the urges to finish she took her mouth off me and said “We’re gonna get caught” in a whispered panic and I was reminded of the reality of it all. I picked up her petite frame, toned from years of ballet, grabbing her by her ass cheeks and lowered her onto me. After a few struggled pumps with her in the air, I put her onto the sink again, facing me this time, and hammered into her as hard and fast as I could, relishing in every stifled moan and breath. Feeling the fluids rising in me I grabbed at her passionately, kissing, biting and sucking her neck, “I’m close” I said quietly with heavy breaths into her ear. A few more frantic pushes later a river of pent up cum unleashed violently like a breached dam, flooding her pussy. She moaned quietly and her legs spasmed in my hands as she felt it gushing into her. She was scrunching my hair with one hand and pushing my lower back closer to her with the other, digging her face into my chest. As my orgasm was passing it’s peak my thrusts slowed as I slid a bit further inside her gliding along the warm fluids we produced while allowing my senses to overwhelm me in joy for the moment.
I still didn’t want it to be over, I didn’t want to pull myself out, but it had to be done…for now. We raced to put clothes back on and catch our breath when she whispered how much she’s missed my dick. I repeated the same, but I was referring to everything about her: her smile, her vibe, her laugh, I missed it all. It was then I knew I was in love with her again, or maybe it never left.
She left the bathroom first and I gave it a few minutes before I tried to sneak back downstairs inconspicuously. She seemed to feel really guilty afterwards and didn’t want to talk with me nearly as much as she had been to this point and I took a realistic assessment of what our situation was. Not long after this, her boyfriend came to get her. He was waiting in his car across the street and called her cell when she looked at me sadly and showed me his name pop up on her phone. I walked her to the door (it was still shut with us inside) and I asked if it was ok to text her. She said she’d rather text me in case he’s around and I figured that was better than nothing. I gave her a huge kiss, which was definitely visible to a few people at the party, if they bothered to look, before walking back to the party.
I gotta hand it to them, I got the sense each one of them knew what just happened but not a single one asked me or her about it or made any comments. They just carried on like normal with no perceived judgement. During our relationship it wasn’t odd for her and I to use a bedroom upstairs in the middle of a party so it’s possible they had become used to this behavior. The thing that stuck with me most though is they all had met her new boyfriend and not a soul snitched on us. It almost seems like they didn’t know what had happened, but it wasn’t a huge party like it used to be and our absence would be easy to noticed. I like to think they knew and just had my back, but I couldn’t tell for sure.
We did hook up a few more times all while she was with him, but we never got back together. However, on days like today where I miss her a lot, I have the sense she’s thinking about me too.
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/j3z5hl/the_one_that_got_away_mf_cheating_nonfiction_long