Sharing my wife against my will? [MF] [M]

Sharing wife against my will? [MF] [M] With updates

Original post followed by updates. I was adding them last night but not sure people could see them.

My wife [27] and I [28] have been married almost four years. We started dating in college and got married a little while after I graduated.

She has a good sized following on Instagram and 99% of what she posts is from our workouts, whether it’s CrossFit or hiking or whatever. I will be the first to admit I married way out of my league. I will never deny that.

We have worked out at the same gym for a while now. Lots of old faces but some new ones every so often. Not a lot of people stick with CrossFit but there’s always a new person willing to try it out. On Monday, a new guy showed up. The guy is in incredible shape, and he’s a freak because of his size. He’s probably 6’5” and I’m guessing 245, but that’s a guess. He has nothing but muscle on his frame.

After we worked out he took a liking to my wife. She openly flirted back which 100% caught me off guard. I walked over and she introduced me as her husband. He told me she was amazing. I agreed and we went our separate ways. I made a comment about him flirting with her and she just laughed and said it was cute.

Fast forward to Wednesday. We worked out again and they talked after for a minute and then we all started cleaning up the room. Then he shocked me by asking me “I know we just met but your wife is amazing. Any chance I could take her out this weekend?” Without even the slightest amount of hesitation he asked if he could take my wife on a date. I scoffed and said “good luck with that, buddy”.

He waited until she was close and then asked her if she wanted to go to dinner with him on Friday night. She said “sure that sounds like fun”. He responded with “I was thinking just you and I”. She looked at me and then back and told him again it sounded fun. I said “what the hell?” She just turned to him and told him she would talk to me about it and would let him know. Not only did he ask, she said yes.

We got in the truck and she instantly hits me with a “hear me out” explanation. I’m still shocked about what just happened. Her thinking is it is just as friends and he doesn’t want anything. I disagree about 2000%. She doesn’t think he would have asked me first if he was trying anything else.

Last night we went to work out and he was there again. I was steamed the whole time but I tried to keep my cool. After, they flirted again. I could tell she was into him and it was more physical than she would admit. I walked over to them and she says “I told him we talked and Friday is good”. I just walked away. When she was ready to leave she went over and gave him a hug which probably got to me more than anything else.

She told me that she had decided she would get dolled up, go have a nice dinner and that would be it. I was overreacting completely.

Tonight is the night they are going out. I don’t know where or anything. I know we are lifting this afternoon, and then she’s going to get ready to go out. I set my iPad up so I get her messages and haven’t seen anything. She talks to her best friend about everything and told her she was going to dinner with a friend. Part of me thinks I’m overreacting. Part of me wants to go crazy. I am a push over with her, so even if this was something I should worry about I don’t know what I would even say or do. Needless to say tonight is going to be shitty. I have half way thought about following them but not convinced that’s a great decision either. Either I am crazy and overacted or it’s really what I assume it is and I end up seeing something happen. Neither is a great option.

I am also confused at whether I’m angry or turned on. The whole thing is fucked up.

Update: We are both getting off early to discuss the whole thing. Not sure what changes but at least it will be in the open.

Update 2: she came home and we talked about it. Whole conversation wasn’t even five minutes. Short version- Yes she’s sexually attracted to him and it feels like one of those times in life she would regret passing on. I followed a fellow redditors advice and asked what they talked about when I wasn’t there. She said they talked about his gym routine, his supplements and she even asked if it helps him in the bedroom. She said he replied by telling her he is quite well endowed and excels in the bedroom. I asked if she planned on sleeping with him. She said straight up that it was on her mind and she hadn’t ruled it out.

Immediately after our conversation she text her best friend and told her that we talked and she was honest with me. Her best friend asked if she was still going to go out and she said absolutely. Her best friend told her what dress to wear. My wife then told her that she asked if he would notice if she didn’t wear a bra and panties. Her friend said he absolutely would notice. Her reply was good.

So there you have it.

Update 3: She decided it would be better not to go to dinner but wants to invite him over. I told her that if he does, he is an outsider. This ain’t a him and her thing. It’s an us and him thing. I’m willing to see how I feel about it if it’s done slowly and respectfully. I don’t know if he’s coming tonight or later but the date thing isnt going to happen.

Update 4: Probably last update. I told her that she could go if she wanted. I made it clear if she went it was over and I would be filing for a divorce. She said this was something she needed to know. So she’s out now and I’m drunk and I need a lawyer. She texted her friend what we talked about. Her friend said if she needed to know then so be it. Last update text she sent said he had his hand on her thigh at dinner. Turns me on and tears me up at the same time. She has text me to make sure I know she’s safe but no details.

Update 5: she text her friend because they are going to his place

Update 6: too long to explain but she’s home. She text her friend during and it seems nothing happened. He did a work call (at 1130pm?) and that was it. He text me from his own phone (she gave him my number?) saying he wouldn’t do anything with her if I said no. I said no and apparently he respected my wishes? She did text her friend that she rubbed his dick from outside his pants on way home and she almost got off from it. Also not sure how that works.

Her and I talked during and I asked questions but all of the answers basically defaulted to she was going to sleep with him if he made a move to. When they got to the house he got out and let her out of the car and then hugged her. His hands were completely on her ass and her dress was riding up so you could see her ass. You could also see he’s massive from through his jeans. I’m going to smoke some weed and go to bed because my life is so fucked up right now. To those supportive of me thanks for being good humans. For the assholes, fuck you.

Update 7: we have talked a lot about everything today. Honestly don’t think anything has changed but I think it’s more out there in the open now.

I told her where I stand. I think the whole situation could be fun but it seems to be happening without any concern for me. She says she honestly can’t explain what it is about him and that it’s driving her and she’s scared of missing on something and regretting it. I asked at the end of our last talk if knowing how I feel she would go about it different. She said maybe a little bit not sure how. Also said she still thinks she would sleep with him if he tried.

She text her friend about how she was feeling. She sounded a little more remorseful but that could be me reading it differently.

She knows I posted this anonymously to Reddit. I told her I had to vent and she gets it.

Update 8: So far not much has changed between us. She posted a response comment on here which is whatever. She has continued to text him but nothing sexual or flirty. Her best friend told her I a text she thinks she should get permission to go out one night no limits and next day decide stay or go. At this point I think she goes out without permission and decides we are over or I give her permission and it’s over anyways.

I confronted the guy at the gym. Told him my headspace and what’s going on. He wasn’t as nice as he was when he text me. He said that those issues are between me and her. Also said that he wants to see her again but that’s on her and he won’t push. Not sure she needs a push. He also said he was under the impression when he approached me the first time we were open to the idea. I asked where he got that idea from and he said he just did. I asked what happened on the date and he said he wasn’t going to say anything and if I wanted to hear I should hear from her. I asked if they had sex, foreplay, kissed. He just said it wasn’t like that and to talk to her.

So if my math is right, somehow this guy thought we were into sharing, doesn’t know from where he got that and won’t comment on whether he’s done anything with her. So literally a man without a single answer.

Earlier I told my wife to do whatever she thought was best. No qualifiers. Just flatly do whatever.

I did see a text she sent her friend confirming I said she could go (I didn’t say it like that but that’s what she heard) but she thought it was a trap. Welcome to another fucked up day.

Update 9: She has decided to go out on Friday. Her friend asked her if she wanted a hotel room and she said no. I finally told her she can go Friday with my blessing but to know it is killing me. I also said I see little to no chance we reconcile afterwards regardless of how she feels. She asked me to support her and wanted to know if we could all, including him, could go out to eat this week and talk. We are going to take an hour or so and come down from being heated with each other and will sit down to talk later.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/ifzxuw/sharing_my_wife_against_my_will_mf_m