[MF] That one time I got punched in the naked dick by a crazy lady.

This story is absolutely true, and absolutely ridiculous.

I think the most awful random hookup I had occurred about 2 years back. I had broke up with a girl I’d been with for about 6 months one morning, and proceeded to go on my way and hook up with a few women to get my mind off the whole situation.

I slept with a girl that I met on tinder in the early afternoon, and almost immediately after this girl I used to party with got ahold of me on FB and wanted to hang out. I wound up picking her up and getting a room at a shitty motel 6 cause my ex was at our apartment.

Girl is sexy, but batshit insane. In the middle of casual conversation she decides to go completely rogue and go for my zipper. She winds up wrestling my pants off and gets my cock out, and it hits me that I didn’t even take a shower after the girl I had just left when she hit me up.

I told her strait up DO NOT PUT THAT IN YOUR MOUTH! And she just so happened to ask “why did you fuck some other bitch earlier?” I was completely honest and told her I actually had and said just let me shower and we’ll be fine.

She said she didn’t fucking care cause she fucked girls all the time and stripped but ass naked. Smokin hot body, but big weird gnarly bush she’s all about. I don’t even honestly know what’s happening at this point with how crazy this woman has gotten since I used to know her.

She finishes showing me her bush then like has a cartoony lightbulb moment and remember she was trying to blow me. She hops back on that task with full speed and starts inhaling in a way I can’t even describe… it was fucking intense…. she was doing some weird moan/growling and talking to herself.

I felt like I was in bizarro land but it was fucking spectacular head. She pushed my thighs hella far apart and then out of fucking nowhere reared up and went ACHHHH and fucking fired off a wad of spit at my dick then followed it with a strait up punch. Right to my naked balls and wiener dudes.

I rolled off the bed onto the shitty fake wood floor and finally was screaming what is your fucking problem?! She started flipping out saying my dick tasted like some bitches pussy and then spat at me again like some hairy pussy camel…

I had to chase her out of my room, and she disappeared out of my life completely after that. She left all her shit. Phone, clothes, the works. Just lost her fucking mind I guess idk.

One of my darker moments. Left me with two forms of blue balls.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/iaifbe/mf_that_one_time_i_got_punched_in_the_naked_dick