This is the weirdest thing I’ve ever written. A zombie-filled, pornographic, apocalyptic comedy. It’s more fun with the pictures (mobile friendly). May your quarantine be full of laughter and orgasms.
https://crazyhotzombies.com
Here’s the start…
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The Crazy Hot Zombie came into the house naked. Her nipples were glistening on her swollen titties. She was smoking.
Literally.
Her golden Hawaiian skin was smoking, because she was shot. Someone had tried to shoot her in the head but missed. She had a bullet-hole in her collar-bone. Her beautiful skin was closing over the injury, giving off smoke like incense.
She healed in only seconds. Then she was standing there perfectly whole. Perfectly hot. Her dark Hawaiian hair fell back from her golden face. Her lips were red and luscious from the brains she had been eating earlier.
10/10 I would hit that.
“Yo, fuck these bitches,” said Mickey.
He put a sawn-off shotgun up to the Crazy Hot Zombie’s face. He blew her head off – that’s the only way to kill a Crazy Hot Zombie.
“She was fine though,” I said.
“She was,” said Mickey. “Now she’s got an apple bottom and a watermelon head.”
I stepped over the dead Crazy Hot Zombie, and I stood by the window. Mickey and I were on opposite sides of the living room. We were holed up in 6-room house in Waikiki, Hawaii.
The house had been abandoned by a rich guy – or I guessed that from the pictures on the wall. The rich guy had a small airplane in the pictures, a Cirrus.
Maybe the rich guy had tried to fly his plane away. Maybe he made it. But the Crazy Hot Zombies had taken over. Every part of the world was just as fucked as Oahu. So, if the rich guy had tried to stop for fuel, he was probably dead, eaten.
Or maybe he was a Crazy Hot Zombie himself.
“Oh, shit,” whispered Mickey. “Look outside.”
I leaned out the window with my shotgun. I looked over the sloped yard. The road was quiet. But there was a long shadow on the grass, stretching out from the brick mailbox.
The shadow moved. It moved again. From around the mailbox came a skinny white college-girl. She had a snobby face, like she was too good for Harry Potter even when she was a kid.
Also – I’m white, and I read everything. So I’m allowed to talk shit.
“She’s alive,” said Mickey. “She’s one of us.”
“Hey, hungry girl!” I called out to her. “Hey, skinny! Come up here.”
She saw me and started up the yard. But then from the bushes to her left came a rustling. Out stepped a tall naked man-zombie. The man-zombie had jet-black hair. His eyes were like piercing cobalt.
“Don’t look at him!” I called out. “Hey, skinny! Ignore him!”
But the man-zombie moved closer to the college-girl. He made a low sultry noise, like a friendly tiger. It was like he was going to hurt her – just a little – but she would like it too, and after that he would take care of her…
—–
https://crazyhotzombies.com
Source: reddit.com/r/eroticliterature/comments/gc0c0x/mfz_crazy_hot_zombies_the_apocalypse_is_coming_so