This is a long, but funny, true story about a hilarious set of events that happened to me in college… here we go.
I went to college in a small town about 3 hours from the US/Mexico border. Me and my buddies would take a few trips down there a year just to drink super cheap and act like we were cool for crossing the border.
We planned out one of these trips with me and three other guys. Two of them had girlfriends rolling with us, but my roommate Sam and me were rolling single. Sam had invited a chick from a neighboring town that he was trying to hook up with to go with us because she had never gone. She was bringing a friend so I figured I could be a good wingman at the very least. And who knows, maybe she’d be hot and I could try to take advantage of the two of us being kinda paired up.
The girls showed up at our house around 5:00. Sam’s girl, Kelsey, was pretty cute and all over him from the first minute they got there. Her friend, Jenn, was a tall brunette with some serious sex appeal. She looked like a trailer park beauty pageant queen. She was hot, but with a tinge of slutty/trashy. The kind of girl you want to hook up with, but not bring home to your parents. In other words, the PERFECT kind of girl to go on a random road trip to a Mexican border town with. She was flirty with me from minute one, and I thought to myself this was going to be a good night…
We all introduced ourselves and loaded up into 2 cars with a couple cases of beer and took off. Got to the border town about 9:00, checked in to two rooms at the Super 8 (classy, i know), and called a cab to get across the border.
We had a good buzz from the drive down and went right into the bar and ordered buckets of beer. $5 for a bucket of 6. There were eight of us so we were ordering buckets four at a time and they were disappearing quickly. Jenn was taking shots like she was on a mission to drink all the tequila in Mexico. She led me out on the dance floor, and boy could she move… before I knew why was happening, I got hard on the dance floor and she could feel it grinding on her ass through her jeans. She turned around surprised with a big smile.
“I can’t believe I just did that to you,” she said.
“What?”, i laughed. “You were all up on it! What did you think was going to happen?”
“Well I was just surprised, because you know… you are… the way you are”, she replied.
Now I was probably looking at her like she was from outer space. We had both stopped dancing and we were both confused at our conversation, but me more so.
“What does that mean?”
“Well because you’re gay!”, she exclaimed.
“WHAT?!?! I’m not gay!”
At this point I looked over at my friends who were DYING laughing. Those assholes had told her I was gay while were on our way and I had no idea.
Asshole Friends – 1
Me – 0
But their prank had backfired. Now it seemed that she wanted me even more because she thought she couldn’t have me. The problem was that she got entirely too wasted and despite our intense make out sessions on the dance floor for the rest of the night, she passed out hard on the way back to the hotel. We drove back the next morning and they left. Opportunity lost…
Turns out that Sam’s girl, Kelsey, also got way too bombed for them to do anything beyond making out, (Good. Fuck him and his prank. Lol). So the next weekend we decided to head to their town after work on Saturday night. We left our house at 11, it was almost a two hour trip, so we weren’t going to get there until 1:00 am. They had planned for us to “watch a movie” so I knew it was go time when we got there. We grabbed a 12 pack for the road and some caffeine pills (hardcore, I know). I had never taken them before but I didn’t really think much of it.
By the time we got there, my stomach was in knots. This was going to be bad… about 10 mins after we showed up, I got hit with the worst diarrhea I’ve ever had. Their house was old and small, the walls were pretty thin so they could definitely hear me punishing the toilet. I came out of the bathroom sweating and feeling like absolute shit. I knew it wasn’t over… but we couldn’t leave right away because it was two hours back home and I wasn’t going to make it without stopping. We ended up leaving at 4:00 am and driving back. My stomach was killing me, my asshole was on fire, and my balls were blue. Again.
Fast forward a month. I was having a New Years party at my house and it was a banger. We probably had about 50 people jammed into this little 3/2 house, music blasting, drinks flowing, everyone dressed up… when at about 11:00 Jenn walked through the front door with Sam and Kelsey. I had no clue she was in town! Both of us were tipsy and knew exactly what we wanted. She wasn’t there for five minutes before we were off to my room.
Quick but important note:
Earlier that summer, I had dated this girl named Ashley. She went to HS in the town where I was in college, but SHE went to college in a different town. We broke it off on good terms when she left, neither of us were wanting a long distance thing, but we semi stayed in touch and would hang out when she was in town and even hooked up once when she was visiting home. Ok back to the story…
Jenn and I wasted zero time getting into my room and getting clothes off. This had been almost six weeks in the making and we were both ready for it, I was already hard as a rock. She threw me back on the bed and pulled my cock out and immediately took all of it into her mouth… I’m not some huge porn star sized guy, but I know I’m above average. Only one girl had been able to take all of me before… she bobbed up and down for a bit when I told her to quit unless she wanted to end right away.
I asked her how she wanted it…
“Get behind me”, she said.
I quickly followed her request and started going to town on her doggy style. Her ass was even better than I remembered and I had the perfect buzz to where I thought I could keep going for a little while… she grabbed my cowboy hat off of my dresser and put it on. It was sexy as hell…
She climbed on top and was riding me wearing nothing but my hat and some red heels, lights on, no covers or anything when I heard the door to my room open. I looked over and who was standing there but Ashley and her friend who had JUST showed up to the party and were coming to put their purses in my room.
I froze for a second as I made eye contact with Ashley… this was awkward. Usually she called when she was coming to town, but I had no idea she’d be there. It wasn’t a huge deal, not like I was cheating or anything because we were both 100% single, but it was weird none the less.
She quickly shut the door and I went right back to what I was doing. After another 15 mins or so, Jenn and I finished up, got dressed and wandered back out into the party. Everyone knew what we did but I didn’t care at all. After everything I’d been through, I needed it!
Jenn and I ended up having sex again after the party was over, she left the next morning and I’ve never seen her since… y’all ready for the plot twist?
I told you the blurb about Ashley was important, and here’s why. About two years after this incident, Ashley and I ran into each other randomly one night and started dating shortly thereafter. 12 years later we’ve been happily married for 9 years and have two kids! I always tell her that she married me because she saw my night moves and knew she had to have that in her life for good!! ???
She tells me I’m full of shit… she’s probably right.
Hope y’all enjoyed my trip down memory lane!
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/g3t0g9/a_hilarious_sequence_of_events_that_led_to_an
great stroy
The ending was epic! And a little bit of “aww”.