When I Developed a Masochistic Anal Sex Kink [FM]

I a have a shameful kink that started with my ex. We were trying anal sex, and I was on top because I heard it hurt less that way, but it did. At first, I was controlling the motion, but then he started moving into me, and I said, “It’s starting to hurt a lot now” in a low voice because I didn’t feel like yelling, He kept going anyway, so I involuntarily shouted, “Nooooo” really loud and then he came. He said, “I think you screaming ‘No’ made me cum,” and looked surprised and disgusted with himself. I was kind of angry but mostly really turned on that he did what he wanted even though I said “No.”

Now, I am with someone else. We’ve had anal sex about handful of times, maybe a little less, and the same thing happens with him. The second time we tried it, he was on top of me and I was face down on the bed. It started to hurt, and I told him so calmly, but he didn’t stop. He said something like “It’s ok. It’s ok” and kept going. Then I said it a little louder, more sternly, and he said, “I’m sorry, but it feels too good” and just went a little faster, like he wanted to finish up before I could make him stop. This made me really turned on, and I could feel my pussy pulsate a bit, and he eventually came. Afterwards, I had such a strange mix of emotions, like I should be angry with him but knew that I also liked it. I really did mean it at first when I said it hurt but somehow it became part of the kink, so it’s all very confusing.

Recently, my current boyfriend and I were going at it in the same position as mentioned above, and the same thing happened. I had already told him that I was into this weird masochistic thing, so there’s no way to tell if he’s playing along or just doing what he wants, but I get super turned on nonetheless. I just want to be taken advantage of and used for his pleasure with no regards to my own protestations or pleasure. I want to fight against him while he tries to have his way with me, but I want him to overpower me.

So, yeah, I guess that makes me some kind of freak.

**Edit:** After doing some research, I learned that this kind of play is not weird, but the guys were fucked up for not obeying my “no” the first time, even if it turned out to be a kink because they didn’t know that initially. Consensual non-consensual is the way to go, and if you’re considering this with your partner, make sure limitations and safe ground rules are discussed beforehand.

Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/fw7uro/when_i_developed_a_masochistic_anal_sex_kink_fm

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