Link to part 6: [https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/cdqmsc/fucking_my_best_friend_part_6/](https://www.reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/cdqmsc/fucking_my_best_friend_part_6/)
Despite a horribly long and restless night, I swung my feet over the side of my bed. It was dead silent in my room. There was no one laying next to me. There would be no one joining me in the shower that morning. There would be no one joining me for bed at the end of the day either. I was alone.
I walked over to my mirror. For the first time in months I felt like I recognized who I saw. Maybe, just maybe, I could turn things around, I thought. Maybe not.
I walked towards the shower. It was just another day for everyone else. No, It was more than that. It was the first beautiful early spring day. I passed by the underclassmen who were scurrying to make accommodations for an impromptu BBQ later on. I passed by my friends who were coming out of their comas from the night before. I opened the door to the bathroom and heard joking, laughing, even singing coming from the various stalls and showers. I saw a friend of mine slap his girlfriends ass as she got into the shower before him. Maybe this wasn’t the end of my story, but rather, the beginning. That morning was almost too perfect to be real.
I finished up my shower and went over to Brian’s room. I wiggled the handle but it was still locked. I knocked and called his name. After a few minutes I heard him rustling inside and walk over to the door. He opened it a crack and poked his head out.
“Hey man, not really a good time.”
“Is Reagan in there with you?”
“Yea, she’s really pissed at you for what you did to Nicky.”
“What..? What did I do to Nicky?”
“You made out with that little Latina girl the other night right in front of her bro.”
“I did?”
“Is that Nate?” I heard her call out.
Brian opened the door. I peaked my head inside.
“Hi Reagan.”
“Nate! How could you do that to Nicky!”
Despite what I had just learned, all I was thinking about was that she was topless. She had the sheet wrapped around her chest to hide her breasts. It honestly felt weird that she was covering herself but I suppose she was definitely the normal one here.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize… I was drunk.”
“You don’t sound very sorry. She’s really upset you know.”
“Hey come on now, there’s no need for this! Can’t we all just get along?” Brian hopped back onto the bed with her.
“I’ll apologize to her Reagan.”
“Good, now can you get out, I’m naked.”
“Yes, sorry.” That time, I meant it.
I left. Brian wasn’t going to be of any help that day. It’s a shame I couldn’t sleep with Reagan, that really would have taken my mind off things. I went back to my room.
I sat down in the chair at my desk and picked up my guitar. It was still too early to text anyone I needed to make amends with so I just sat there and played. I wasn’t sure what to do. My mind was racing. Despite the golden rays peaking through my blinds, the sounds of laughter and morning drinking coming from the hallway, and the generally good mood everyone seemed to be in, I was scared. I was so scared to hurt anyone, to make Sarah feel badly, or to face Nicky. I didn’t want to see her look at me for who I really was. I didn’t want to lose the recognition I saw in my reflection that morning. I just wanted to hide.
I got a text from Ella.
<Good luck today Nate <3 I decided to have a serious talk with Ryan about everything too… Gulp…>
<Oh man, good luck dude, let me know how it goes.>
I guess she was going to tell Ryan. With any luck he’d come murder me before I saw Nicky or Sarah.
I thought about Ella, Sarah, Nicky, everything. I thought about Reagan and Brian in the other room and how he was probably deep inside her right now or feeling her lips around his cock as her no longer covered breasts bounced to the rhythm of the act. I wanted to barge in there and spend the rest of my morning feeling the control and power I felt in bed. I wanted to, but such a thing was just a fantasy anymore. Within the last week my cock was pressed against the walls of Sarah’s pussy with Brian’s right next to it. Ella was letting my cum drip out of her while we talked about life within the last ten hours. Nicky had gagged on my dick and let her drool fall onto her tits within the last day. Regardless of how recent this all was, it felt like a distant life to me now. It felt like I was waking up from a vivid fever dream. As I sat there at my desk, guitar on my lap, sun shining down on me, I couldn’t figure out what was real and what was not, what had happened and what had not, I needed to snap back into reality.
It was then that I noticed the excessive number of empty cans, bottles, and glasses spread around my room. I saw a dollar bill rolled up on my table where a sizable pile of cocaine had been at one point. I saw butts of cigarettes in a tray along with the remnants of a few blunts. I saw an empty box of condoms next to a cock ring. I saw ropes, a ball gag, and a tiny piece of lingerie on the couch. I saw bloody pieces of gauze in and around my trash can. I felt the scars on my body from what had created that pile. What the hell had happened to me? Was this all mine? I knew the answer, but for some reason, this particular morning was the first time I asked the question.
Sarah had said it to me just recently. “No more.” She said it so firmly. To this day I can hear her saying those words to me. I can still see the look on her face as she held back tears and anger and I can feel the pain behind them as she spoke.
“No more.” I said it to myself. She was right. It was time to end this. It was time to end all of this.
I still had a lot of time to kill so I grabbed a trash bag and got to work. “No more.” I kept saying to myself.
After a long while my room was finally clean. I looked around and felt good about what I saw. I finally picked up my phone and sent Sarah a text.
<Sarah, can we talk. When are you free?>
<Hey babe, I was just going to come later for the bbq, can we just talk then?>
<I think we should talk sooner. It’s important.>
<No. I’ll just see you at the bbq.>
…
What? I put my phone down in shock… Did she just say no? I heard a light knock on my door.
“Woah it’s so clean in here! You expecting company?” Brian sat down on my couch and began to pour himself a drink.
“I uhh… just wanted to clean up a bit.” I was still in shock from Sarah’s text.
“Whatever, anyway, I can tell there’s something bothering you so I have a little gift.”
Brian pulled his phone out and sent me a text.
“Is that, you and Reagan?”
“Yea! I recorded it last night and thought you might like to see it. Don’t show anyone else obviously.”
“Yea yea I won’t… Damn, this is really hot. She looks really good… Isn’t this kind of, wrong though? Like, is she ok with me seeing this?”
“What? Since when do you care about right or wrong? I’m sure she wouldn’t mind if you just keep it to yourself. Come on, throw it up on the big screen.”
Sarah, how could she just say no? I tried to do the right thing… I tried….
“Yea alright then.” I started casting the video to my TV and went over to lock the door. Behind me, Brian was dumping two lines of cocaine out on my table.
“Well don’t be shy.” I heard him say, as he was taking his cock out to start masturbating after doing his line.
Brian and I, through our relationship with Sarah, truly had lost all boundaries. There was no longer anything weird or erotic about masturbating together and it was something that happened often. We’d sometimes just watch porn together to come up with things to try on Sarah. There was nothing weird about this at all.
There was one problem though. I cleaned my room. I woke up from my fever dream. Here Brian was, still in it. Did I have to break up with him too? Fuck all of this, I thought. I went back to sleep.
I bent over and snorted my line. I sat down on the couch and pulled out my own cock while Brian and I watched him fuck Reagan on my TV.
He held the camera up as she was bent over his bed. He had his non filming hand firmly gripping her ass while he moved all the way out and all the way back in. I grabbed my phone and scrubbed ahead.
“Hey what the fuck man, I love watching her ass.”
“After this morning, I want to see her tits.”
“Yea alright. She gets on top soon anyway.”
I got to the part where they switched positions. Brian sucked at filming and the transition almost gave me motion sickness. Eventually she settled in on top of him and I had a perfect view of her tits while she bounced up and down on him.
“I wish we could fuck Reagan together.” I don’t remember who said that.
“Me too.” Or that. Although I suppose it doesn’t matter.
Brian told her to talk dirty for the camera. He asked her if she was his little slut. She wasn’t nearly as into it as he was, but she played along.
“Oh Brian I love your penis inside me.” She said.
“You’re such a dirty girl, I bet you wish you had another cock here to put in your mouth while I fuck you.”
“Oh yea, baby, so much.”
I was getting close watching her tits bounce up and down while her pussy swallowed Brian’s cock. For a second I realized that Brian probably hadn’t even showered since this. His dick probably still had her smell on it.
“Don’t finish, let’s wait for Sarah later.” I do remember who said that.
I turned the TV off and Brian and I grabbed two beers before heading out of my room.
Finally, the BBQ came. What had been so clear to me that morning was now gone. I was drunk again. I was high again. I was dreaming again.
Sarah and I were dancing on a table. The music was loud. There were people all around us, but I was there, alone with her. I hated her. I truly hated her. I leaned in and kissed her. She pulled me in closer to her.
“No more.” I said to her.
“What?”
“You said that to me. You said no more.”
“Oh yea, I did.”
“Well I have a response for you.”
The look in her eyes told me everything I needed to know. She hated me too.
“No.” I said.
“What!?”
“Nooooo.”
“You’re drunk.”
“And high.”
She kissed me again.
“I want to break up Sarah.”
“No, we aren’t doing this now.”
“Sarah, I want to…. break up, now.”
She turned around and grinded her hips into me.
“Not now Nate.”
“Fuck you Sarah.”
She turned around and angrily looked at me.
She got off the table and found Brian. I watched her walk upstairs with him. I didn’t follow. I stayed where I was on the table. So much for that.
I had never felt worse in my entire life than I did in that moment. I thought I was going to get closure. I thought I was going to do the right thing. She wouldn’t let me. I didn’t care anymore.
I saw Nicky. Great.
I walked over to her.
“Nicky… I’m, uh, sorry.”
“Nate… whatever. I don’t.. we weren’t dating, I don’t know, whatever.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“I was, but, it’s really whatever. I don’t care.”
“…”
“I don’t think we should really spend time together anymore. I think you are a bad influence on me.”
“Nicky.. I’m…”
“I mean look at you Nate, you can barely put sentences together.”
She was right. I didn’t know what to say anymore, but when I looked her in the eyes I knew what she wanted to say. She didn’t hate me. She wasn’t mad. She felt sorry for me. But there was something else. She was ashamed.
“I understand. I’ll… leave you alone.”
I walked away. I went upstairs. I figured they’d be in Brian’s room so I headed there. The door wasn’t locked. I guess they were expecting me.
“Hey Nate.”
“Oh… Hey Reagan.”
“Have you seen Brian? I just came up here to get a drink but I haven’t seen him in a while.”
“No, I don’t know where he is.” I sat down.
“Did you talk to Nicky? I saw her down there earlier.”
“I did.”
“How’d it go?”
“Fine. I don’t think she’s really that upset anymore.”
“You know she had a huge crush on you right?”
“Yea.”
“…”
“…”
“You’re kind of a dick sometimes haha”
“…Yea.”
“Nate, you look really sad.” She sat down next to me.
She looked amazing. Her shirt was too small for her, but she really pulled it off. I couldn’t get the recording of her riding Brian out of my head. All I wanted in that moment was to fuck her. I wasn’t sad anymore. I was just horny.
“I am. I’m really sad.”
“Awh, why? You can talk to me.”
No I couldn’t. How could I? Where would I even begin?
“You know, you look gorgeous in that Reagan.”
“Oh, unexpected, but thanks Nate.”
“I mean it. Brian is a lucky guy. I wonder what would have happened if I had met you first.”
“You did meet me first.”
“I meant before Nicky, not Brian.” I looked directly at her.
“Are you hitting on me right now? Seriously?”
“Do you ever wonder what it would be like to fuck me?”
“Nate, what the fuck? What about Brian? Or Nicky?”
“What about them?”
She paused. For a second I thought I saw her consider it. If not consider, maybe just picture it. But she wasn’t dreaming like I was.
“I think you should go.”
“Yea, sorry.” I said as I stood up.
As I was walking back through the hallway, I saw Brian and Sarah.
“Hey Brian, Reagan is looking for you.”
He high-fived me and continued on towards his room.
“I’m kinda tired, Brian fucked me pretty hard on your bed. I think I’m going to head home so I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you babe.” She was lying.
“Yup.” So was I.
She left.
No more.
Yup.
I knew it was going to be at the time. I knew that was going to be the last thing I ever said to Sarah. I was right.
She said it. She said, no more. This was all her idea.
I went back downstairs. The music was loud. The whole room was jumping. Everyone was happy. I saw all the underclassmen smiling. I wondered which among them were making mistakes this very moment. I wasn’t as drunk anymore. My friend handed me a beer. I took it from him and cracked it open. I looked across the room and just like that my entire life changed. I saw a girl. I saw *the* girl.
She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. There was something about her. She was magnetic. The beer I was holding dropped to the floor as I walked over.
“Hi. I’m Nate.”
“I’m Kim. Nice to meet you Nate.”
“Do you, want to go upstairs?”
“What? Haha, no. I just met you.”
“Right, right. Sorry, I…”
“It’s ok, you look like you’ve had a long, drunk, day. How about, I give you my number, and you text me sometime?”
“I can do that.” I said as she took my phone.
“When you do text me, maybe put a little more thought into it than, do you want to go upstairs? You’re cute, but I have no patience for bullshit.”
“That seems fair.”
“I’ll see you around, Nate was it?”
I stood there staring at my phone. Kim. She had no patience for bullshit huh? Well so be it. No more. No more bullshit.
While looking at my phone I got a text from Ella.
<I talked to Ryan.>
Right, Ryan… I forgot about him. I hadn’t seen him at the BBQ. I guess he was at her place.
<How’d it go? Did you tell him about us?>
<No… It didn’t really come up, but he got a really good job across the country. He’s moving down there in a few months once he graduates.>
<Oh, Ella, I’m sorry… Are you guys breaking up?> I smiled.
<No, he asked me to move down there with him after next year when we graduate.>
<Oh my god, isn’t that a little soon? Also you’re going to be long distance all next year?>
<I guess it is soon, and yea long distance will suck, but I said yes Nate. I can’t lose him.>
<Damn, well, just damn I guess. I hope it works out.>
<Me too. How did it go with Sarah?>
<We never really talked. But… I’m done with her Ella. I ‘m going to delete her number, I’m just, done. No more bullshit.>
<Hmm, fair enough I guess. Lunch tomorrow?>
<Sure.>
I opened up Sarah’s contact. I pulled up the delete option. I didn’t even hesitate. I hit the button and that was that.
No more. No more bullshit.
My bullshit was a problem today. It was going to be a problem tomorrow. It was time to start fixing things.
(End of part 7)
Epilogue:
Ella and I didn’t get lunch the next day. In fact, I barely saw her at all the rest of that year. She spent all her time with Ryan, while they still could. I understood that. She loved him as much as I hated him. The year after, we hung out every now and then, but we didn’t live that close to each other so it wasn’t nearly as often as it used to be. She went to visit Ryan whenever she could. When we did hang out it was still fun. We texted a lot. But everything that happened between us felt like a distant memory. Ella had woken up. We had both moved on.
It didn’t bother me that much though. I was getting to know Kim. We saw each other all the time and for the first time in a long time I was happy. She didn’t make it easy for me and I really had to clean up my act. She meant it when she said she had no patience for bullshit. I stopped binge drinking. I stopped doing drugs. I stopped sleeping around. I told her everything pretty early on. She became friendly with Ella through me and was surprised we had ever hooked up based on how we interacted. Luckily Kim was very kinky like me, and into a lot of different things. We tried, well, everything. I finally had a healthy sexual relationship that I enjoyed.
I still saw Nicky from time to time. She was sort of friends with Kim actually so initially, that was a little awkward. We are friendly to this day, but she doesn’t know the extent of what happened. She likely never will, but nevertheless, she is happy and doing well in a serious long term relationship.
I never spoke to Sarah again. She never tried to contact me either. She still saw Brian and some of the other guys she’d become close with over the years, but I don’t think she ever slept with Brian again. Not that it mattered to me. I hated Sarah at the end, but looking back on things, I hope it all worked out for her. Sarah and I were terrible for each other. We never got closure on anything that happened between us, we never even technically broke up. The way we left things was immature and a big regret of mine. To this day I feel like I owe her an apology that she never got. It was so easy to see her as a villain in this story, but none of it was ever her idea. None of it was ever her fault. She was just as scared and confused as I was. There is no way for me to ever apologize to her now. All I can do is hope things worked out for her and pretend that is enough.
Brian dated Reagan for a year or so, but they broke up eventually. That was a bit of a wake up call for him and he finally cleaned up his act too. Brian and I live in the same city currently and I see him all the time. He is still one of my best friends, but much like with Ella, everything that happened feels like a distant dream. We don’t masturbate together. I don’t picture myself fucking the girls he dates, nor do I picture him with Kim. He has a good job. He is doing well. Brian finally woke up too.
Kim and I are still dating. We are going to move in together soon and the years I have spent with her have been the best of my life. Kim is the reason I wrote this story. I struggle with depression, so no matter how well everything in my life may be going, I still get upset for no reason. Not too long ago however, I got upset for a really good reason and it was related to this story.
Kim and I took a road trip a year or so ago. Our route happened to pass through where Ella and Ryan lived so we stopped in to see them. Kim had never met Ryan and despite us having a nice dinner with them, she agreed that he seemed like a dick, and somewhat abusive towards Ella. Either way, it was uneventful, but nice to see her after so long.
Ella and I kept in touch over text and facetime over the years. I would often vent to her like I always did when I had problems with Kim or life or mental health and she would do the same. The many snapchats we sent to each other were notably more family friendly than they used to be. The past few months however, nothing.
<Hey Ella, Merry Christmas!!! Hope all is well, let’s chat soon!>
<Hey Ella, you alive? lol>
<Hey Ella, Happy Easter!>
<Ellaaaaaa?>
Nothing.
A few weeks ago. Kim suggested I reach out to a mutual friend to make sure she was ok. I did. Soon after I got a text from Ella.
<I had to tell Ryan everything and he’s furious.>
<Oh, wow that was all so long ago. I kinda forgot he didn’t know.>
<I know, me too. It came up recently because we were talking about Brian of all people.>
<So, what happened?>
<Nate… I can’t lose him. He said I can’t talk to you anymore. He’s furious. Like really really mad. I’ve never been so worried.>
<I understand, I’m sorry Ella. Hopefully things can be normal again one day.>
<Me too, thanks for understanding. I just can’t lose him.>
And that was that. I fucked my best friend and ended up losing her just like every movie ever said I would. We never developed feelings for each other beyond friendship. We never had a big fight. We never did anything but care about each other. It didn’t matter though, and now, she’s gone and I doubt I will ever talk to her again.
I was upset. I didn’t know how to handle it. Kim suggested I write my story. She suggested I relive everything I can remember and put it in writing. This way, in writing, it’s no longer a dream. It’s real and it’s something that happened to me. It’s something that I was at one point in my life. Everything ended in one way or another and I need to live with that. I need to face the reality of all of this.
It’s time to stop trying to remember if any of this really happened or not. It did. And now that I’ve told my story. It’s time to let it go. Whether I made the right decisions or not, it doesn’t matter. Playing an endless game of what if in my head is not good for me. It’s not good for anyone.
This story is over. I wont let it haunt me. No more. No more bullshit.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/cf19x3/fucking_my_best_friend_part_7_finale_and_epilogue
Hey everyone! So I am finally done telling this story after starting a month or so ago. It really meant a lot to me to have everyone tell me they enjoyed the story and to have read this far.
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I know this part was really not very sexual, but this is how it happened and I didn’t want to exaggerate or make anything up just for the sake of porn. That aside, I really like writing here and will try and think of some other more nsfw experiences I can share with you all. Who knows, maybe there will be some things in the future to share as well!
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If you’ve read this far, just know that I really appreciate it and I thank you. Whether you liked the ending and the story, or not, it means a lot to me that you read it and that I was able to get it out.
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I try to answer all my pms and as many comments as I can, so if you have any more questions please feel free to ask! Kim and I, like I said, are very kinky as well, so if you want to share any lewd thoughts please feel free to do so as well! We both read the comments/pms here!
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Lastly, I am doing very well currently, despite what recently happened with Ella. It saddens me, and I worry about her, but I trust her to take care of herself and I hope that one day we will be able to be friends again. I truly only ever wanted her to be happy and still do.
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Thank you all again!!!!!
I’m low key kinda happy the story is finished. My friend’s coming back from a trip soon and I don’t need whatever having this in the back of my head will do to our relationship when we meet again. Her name isn’t Ella, but she fucking looks like one. Anyway, hope you’re doing well man
Wow man, I don’t even know how to express how I feel about the ending and everything, been following from the start and began caring less and less about the sexual bits as we all realised there was something more important to your story than that. The whole time I was hoping there would be an amicable ending to your relationships with ur friends and of course, Ella. But it seems like it is as you said, just an ending, not a definitive happy nor a sad one.
In a weird way I feel happiness yet the same amount of sadness for you. Happy because for once in a long time you’ve made progress on urself and not kept yourself stagnant, along with developing a stronger and real relationship with Kim.
However I personally feel what you and Ella had is extremely special and no human deserves to just have someone so close and someone whose been such a big part of their life, just drop off outta their lives like that. Doesn’t seem that there was any closure or time to slowly adjust the lost of a friendship. I don’t care what ppl say, but most of us aren’t emotionally built to handle that well. And it doesn’t help with the suspicions that Ella’s with someone who may or may not be abusive and etc.
In the end, I think its important to never feel bad that you may be depressed, as most of us would very likely be in the same state of mind had something like this happened to us.
I do think that at some point, and it’s hard to speak how much you still care, to reach out to Ella at some point. I don’t know but it feels as though if you never talk to her again, you’ll always wonder. But as you said for now it’s good to let go, and when your ready and feel like it’s time, then maybe reach out just to check if she’s okay.
Nonetheless man, thanks for sharing your story, it’s not easy to talk about things like this. I hope the story doesn’t end though, if in years down the line there’s an update, most of us would be here to read it, and we’re all hoping for the best for you. :)
Note: sorry if I rambled alot, like I said I was feeling alot of emotions with your story haha.
Thank you for sharing man. You’re a hell of a writer. I hope you and Kim continue on and I hope you can reestablish friendship with Ella eventually. Best of luck and I hope you continue doing well.
I haven’t read a real book in a long time and this was better than most books I’ve read!
This was simply incredible. I found part one the day you posted it and eagerly awaited each subsequent instalment. The best writers tell the stories they know and feel from life experiences, and that shines brightly in your words, man. Bravo.
Your story comes at a particularly difficult time in my own relationship; a “dead bedroom”, an unhappy marriage that resembles roommates more than lovers… two people realizing they’re very different than when they first met but have never addressed it in the 10+ years together.
Your struggle with depression resonates with me – I do as well, and it can be crippling. It always seems easier to try a quick fix or avoid the tough conversations altogether. Avoiding conflict is the cowardly, but also the understandable, course of action. Numbing the pain with substance abuse and sex is a good idea in the moment and a terrible regret in hindsight.
Your story has helped me reflect on and make progress with my own insecurities and problems. I was so wishing for a relief for you in the end and I am so glad you have it. That gives me something I don’t have a lot of: hope.
Thank you for your story.
Wow is all I can say, this story has been by far my favorite GWS series and the only series that I’ve felt the need to consistently check the subreddit for new posts. This is more than smut, it’s history and reality; something not many stories on here share. Your diction and wording was spectacular and intriguing. Thank you for this wild ride and I’m glad you made it through everything and put it in the past
Epic tale, great insight to your life. Thanks for sharing.
While this series was long, I was very vested in seeing it through. It is good that you told things as you saw and experienced them. Writing is good to relieve your problems. After Part 6, I figured this was where it was heading. You may never get the closure you seemed with Sarah; life goes on. I am glad you did find your happiness and are moving forward. It is also good to remember things so that you don’t make the same mistakes as you did before. Overall, this is a really good story. Good luck on your future.
“Slow clap, standing applause”. That was was easily the best story ive read on here. Excellent job and I truly hope everything works our for you
Great story, great writing. Thanks for sharing
I have tears streaming down my face. There’s so much I want to say but I just don’t know where to begin, so I’ll keep my comment as brief as possible. That was such an exhilarating and relatable journey. The immaculate detail, the intricacies of emotions and thoughts, the honesty, the rawness… all breath-taking. I’m happy for you that you found solace in recounting your memories, as bittersweet as it must be for you. If you don’t mind me asking how old were you when this all started and how old are you now? I’m glad that you’ve found happiness with Kim and wish you two all the best.
Thank you for telling us your storey. You have been through a lot and I hope for the best for you and Kim in the future.
Thanks again.
This was a great series. I hope you and Kim have a nice life!
I’m not going to lie, i teared up reading this. I am so happy that you rose above all of that and my heart feels so wrenched for you and all you’ve been through.
I know you said this wasn’t sexual, but this part NEEDED to be written man. I’m glad you found a good woman to settle down(ish) with. No more bullshit man, do it right.
Ella……you’ll get her back in your life, one day. Be well.
Whoa
Glad you met the gal that made you get your shit together, was an amazing ride. Many thanks for sharing. Saw alot of my self in some of these situations perhaps not to some of the extremes, but none the less was great for a bit of self reflection. Hoping to meet a “kim” soon and stop the whoring lol
I was a little confused by Sarah and her “storyline”. She wasn’t into sex earlier, but then was sleeping with both you and Brian? So did she get over that? And do you ever think that she might’ve been asexual?
Ever thought of making this into an actual book?
That was one hell of read. Hope you’re doing well my friend.
You still need to try and reach out to Ella in my opinion. It was a great read and instead of reading something erotic, I just read something that reflects about the harsh reality of life. I hope you finally get the closure you need.
Also, that Ryan dude is possesive man and MIGHT be abusive. I seriously hope you get to talk to Ella again and have her back in your life (in any form especially as a friend) and I’m almost guaranteed you will. Even if you remove the sex, you’ve been an integral part in her life as much as she is in yours.
I have never been this hooked to any story of any kind ever before. I found myself scrolling through GWS trying to find your title with a new part. Fantastic writing. I could feel the emotion, especially in this last part. Bravo to you, sir.
What an unbelievable rollercoaster this series has taken us all on. Unfortunately I can relate on far too many aspects, whether it’s the substance abuse or sex to mask the mental health issues or clinging to the last bits of a dying relationship hoping it’ll keep you grounded but in reality is doing more harm than benefits. Lately I feel like I’ve been drowning and losing sight of who I truly am but it is so fucking refreshing to be reminded we aren’t alone in this daily battle that is life… I wish you nothing but the best in life and hope you continue to share your story to help others!
Much love <3
When something eventually happens down the line, you gotta let us know about Ella. I’m sure most of us on this have our own “Ella” be it sexual, or just platonic we all have that friend that we’ve known forever and wouldn’t want to see them hurt even if that means you have to drop out of their life. But every time that happens it’s with the hope that they come back. Ultimately, I believe she’ll see that Ryan is just controlling her life but it may take time, and she is gonna need friends for when it happens. It’s the little things that I believe will help, you get a new number let her know so that she always knows you’re still an option to vent too.
Ngl I can only picture Ronald Reagan when you say “Reagan” and it’s improved the story
This shit should be published. My feelings feel weird.
Haha is Kim korean?
Edit: awesome story btw, props.
Holy fuck man. Talk about some shit to go through. Hope things will work out but bigger thing is hope you’re good man.
Holy fuck man. Talk about some shit to go through. Hope things will work out but bigger thing is hope you’re good man.
Quite the rollercoaster, a very good read
Damn what a rollercoaster
Awesome story man!
Two spare thoughts though, it’s never too late to apologize or seek closure. It seems like it would make you feel good to talk to Sarah one more time about everything. Closure is really important, and based on everything that you two went through she probably wants some too. You said it yourself, the ending of your relationship was kind of immature, but you two are older now and in different phases of your lives, she’s probably woken up too. FWIW I would recommend not closing that door.
Also, you should definitely reach out to Ella and tell her your concerns about Ryan. Definitely a difficult situation and honestly probably nothing that you can do about it, we all have friends we’ve lost to horrible relationships unfortunately, but as her friend it’s the right thing to do, especially if he is abusive. Their relationship seems kind of sick frankly, he clearly has issues and she seems dependent upon him, which is really unhealthy. I doubt that she’s able to see clearly enough for anything you say to make a difference, but if he is abusive and you don’t at least try to get through to her, you’re going to regret it.
Anyway, loved the story, thank you for the great read! And good luck with everything moving forward, having a good partner is the best guard against dreaming again.
Dude, seriously… I’ve enjoyed reading these. You are a gifted writer. I hope that you have found, or can find, peace.
Thanks for sharing.
Holy shit dude… I grabbed my phone and hopped in the shower ready to masturbate and ended up almost crying…
So just about everyone in this story has been having nonmonogamous relationships, most of them dysfunctional.
I highly recommend [blackdragonblog.com](https://blackdragonblog.com) as a guide to getting those right. Indeed, the guy’s introductory ebook is currently [available for free](https://blackdragonblog.com/2019/06/17/a-message-to-roosh-and-heartiste-readers-please-read/), so why not give it a shot.
Thank you for sharing your storie with us!! It saddens me that it ended like that I feel for you but it also give me hope that in the end you could pull your shit together it helped me pull my shit together and thinking that it will end well :) that’s why I wanted to thank you for sharing your stories and fears thank you!!!
I don’t know if a stranger’s perspective matters, but… of all the many, many things you did that you need to feel badly about (and have been working to recover from), losing Ella is *not* one of them.
All the rest was a mess, and you know that. The intent of this isn’t to rub that in but I bring it up just to verify we’re starting front the same perspective. But Ella… Ella lost *you.* And everyone else, to a jealous abuser. If it had only been your perspective that he was like that then maybe it would be less clear, but Kim agreeing nails it down.
You may not be the one who is able to save her from any of that. That’s fucking shitty, I know, but it’s not a matter of fault. But it’s one big bundle of guilt that you don’t need to be carrying around, because it’s the one that isn’t yours in the first place. Ella never woke up; she just dove deeper and decided to pretend everything was okay. That’s not something you taught her… and to be honest, it might have even been something *she* taught*you.*
This is an amazing story. Not necessarily for the NSFW aspects of it, but for the raw honesty and emotion. For me, I feel the story isn’t complete. I understand that for this sub, it had to end, but I would like to here how Kim helped you turn your life around. I know from personal experience that it takes a special kind of person to help turn someone’s life around in the manner that Kim has done for you (and my wife for me).
I’m sure that I’m not the only one, but after this part, I just wanted to give you a hug. Not because I feel bad for you, because I don’t. Your choices where yours, and you alone have to deal with the consequences. No, I wanted to give you a hug because you have felt with those consequences, and you are finally ready to heal.
I wish you and Kim all the happiness in the world. It’s not going to be easy. Happiness is something that you have to work for, and you can’t do that on your own. But, it sounds like you have the perfect person to work with.
Best regards,
LG
Damn I went from beating my dick in the first few parts to crying in my pillow at the end. I hope you’re all good mate and if you ever need someone to talk to I wager any of us in the comments got your back my guy. Thanks for taking the time to write this all out, it was a beautiful tale.
At First, i read the Story because of the sexual parts, but soon after Part 2 or so, i read it because of the Plot. Stay strong!
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I hope everything will go well.
that was a good ending to the saga
Wow, such a wholesome epilogue. I loved your writing, and it’s weird to realize that a real person actually went through all this, and reacting to this almost feels like a farewell. I wish you all the best together with Kim!
These 7 parts were amazing. You have a real storytelling gift.
Why dont u try and talk to the guy and straighten things out and just explain things to him it was something that happened that ur not proud of but it happened and u cant change that but she is ur bestfriend and he also is a good friend and u dont want any hard feelings between u guys and that u r really sorry from the bottom of ur heart and that it was something that will never happen but that u dont want to loose them as friends and u have turned ur life around u have a good girl that u love dearly and wouldn’t do anything to mess that up either. Just try to talk to them about it. But thanks for the store it reminds me of some of the stuff that I have gone through in my life that I wish I could change and go back and take away but I cant all I can do is move on and go forward in life. Again thanks
Great story and very well written. Thanks for an at work distraction the last few weeks. Several parts hit close to home and I’m glad things worked out for you in the end. Cheers.
I never comment on these things, but after reading all 7 parts, I really must say, bravo, sir. Your writing is phenomenal and worthy of publishing. Your story is one of the few on here I feel is legitimately non-fiction.
With that said, I’m glad things are going well. I’m sorry for your fall-out with Ella. I too had a big falling out with my closest friend, albeit under very different circumstances. It took over 2 years but we eventually reconnected. I can’t possibly know that the same with happen for you and Ella, but I certainly hope it does.
I connected with a lot of what you wrote about. Granted, my time in college wasn’t even a fraction as exciting as yours. I walked away from your stories with a renewed appreciation for my relationships, friendships and my own struggles with depression, substance (ab)use and sex. I sincerely thank you for putting the time into what you’ve written.
Wishing you a prosperous future with Kim. In reference to your earlier comment, perhaps I will DM you my lewd thoughts. Thanks again.
Awe you a hoe dude. How are you gonna let that girl be with someone that beats her, not do anything about it and is obviously no good for her if she’s been hurting herself. You should’ve manned up and been a good friend and got her out of that relationship. Looks like either way you’ll end up getting out of touch with her but at least she’s not in an abusive relationship. ?
Thank you for taking the time to share your story with us.
I can only imagine the mental stress you went through. I’ve always told myself that college was a strange place and time where social rules did not apply and everything was one big party haze.
After waking up, I went on with life like it never happened, no one spoke about it ever. We’ve all moved on, we’ve landed good jobs, we’ve found good partners, we’re doing fine – we grew up.
I had a similar ‘Ella’, we’ve not spoken in many years except for the odd polite social media like. He’s now married and seems to be doing well. On the rare occasion I would think about him for a split second, my mind would go ‘huh, strange times’, chuckle to myself and then the memory’s locked up again.
I appreciate those moments we’ve spent together but I’m proud and content with where I am today, it doesn’t haunt me anymore.
I hope one day when look back at the past, you’ll see the positive things and moments you’ve experienced, not the bullshit.
ps. Kim sounds cool. I like her.
I bet you wish you gotten your act cleaned up a little bit sooner, but hey, better Nate than never.
I like how you tried your best to make Ryan the bad guy. He said to ella he dosnt want her to hang out with you (may be because you were a womanizer using drug and alcohol )but she lied and even cheated with you. The guy may be an abuser. But then again . that doesn’t make your actions any better.
I hope you found what you needed by sharing this story.
Man, your story had my full attention for the past hour and a half. I was there with you the entire way. It actually feels like years have passed when I remember back to the beginning of the story….
I’m glad writing this has helped you as well as entertain us.
.
D mk d d vs ncgggggg MN
Undeniably great writing and story.
That aside, it’s hard to relate to your experiences because you embodied the douchebag frat bro lifestyle that every nerd and non-attractive guy, like myself, could only dream of and envied throughout college. So as mean spirited as this may sound, it’s personally satisfying to read that you ultimately got the end you deserved. You were a dick but still drowning in pussy—as Kanye put it, no one man should have all that power, lol.
Despite that, however, I am glad that you are doing better and that your mental health is okay. I look forward to reading all your future content.
I’m not crying, you’re crying.