[F]un at the [M]all

Hi all, I am a long time subscriber from a different account. I’ve been writing for a while but never submitted anything. Here’s a short story I wrote just to get some feedback and gauge interest. Let me know what you think.

We arrive at the mall to get you some new shorts and a bathing suit for our upcoming beach trip. We walk into JCPenney and you find a cute pair of cutoff’s and some other things you want to try on. You walk into the dressing room and call me when you’ve changed. I come in. The shorts look amazing on you. I tell you to bend over so I can get a good look at your ass. Your ass is absolutely phenomenal. You look back at me and smile as you bend over. Quickly, I pull the shorts down along with your panties. I swear your asshole winks at me so I plant my tongue firmly against it. I quickly lick over your pussy, dragging my tongue over your clit, between your lips and into your tight hole. I stand up and reach into my pocket. I run my left hand under your shirt and firmly grasp the end of the leash that is hidden and pull on it, causing your collar to tighten and restrict your airway as I push the plug into your ass. I pull tighter on the leash as I unzip my pants and slide my manhood into your waiting pussy. We don’t have much time before we are discovered, so I quickly pump in and out of you, beckoning you to cum. With the cold steel plug in your ass, it isn’t long before you are moaning and your walls are tightening. I feel my balls swell and tighten as I pull hard on your leash and cum deep into your womb. I pull out of you, my cum dripping out of you into the floor, and onto the shorts you were trying on. I pull your panties up and pull the shorts off of you and place them back on the hanger. You get dressed and smile when you feel my sticky seed leaking out of you. I kiss you and run my hand over your neck, tracing my fingers over the initials on the collar you wear. You compose yourself and we walk to the counter. You present the shorts to the cashier. She looks at them and can clearly see the cum stain on them. She blushes and I grab your ass and you jump slightly, reminded that the plug is still in your ass. I pay the woman and we leave the store to walk around the mall.

“Thank you for my shorts!” You say.

“Hungry?” I ask.

You reply, “Yes daddy, I’m starving! Can we get Chinese?”

—-

I apologize if there are any formatting issues, I am on mobile. Let me know what you think and I may post more of there is enough interest.

Source: reddit.com/r/Erotica/comments/6kxi57/fun_at_the_mall

One comment on “[F]un at the [M]all

  1. Just some r/erotica guidance:

    Our typical title format would read: “Fun at the Mall [MF] [Domination]”

    Or something like that. The tags let us know the pairing and the general sexual tone of the story. This helps readers get a feel for it before reading.

    Tip on the story:

    Work some dialogue in the middle and definitely in the beginning even just a little. This gives your characters some personality, allows a visual break from walls of text, and can really flesh out your story.

    That being said, this was a really hot tale. Definitely keep them coming!

Comments are closed.